work VS retirement

So, I have worked as an RN for 45 years now. I have enjoyed being a nurse. I recently resigned from a very stressful job. I just got fed up with the stress. Prior to this year, I HAD to work to support myself and my family. Now, I DON'T HAVE to work because I can get SS, and I support only myself. Part of me wants to get another job, because having money is a good thing,but part of me doesn't want to work. I don't feel that I am as alert and on the ball as I need to be, to be a competent RN. I have short term memory loss, and fatigue.I basically don't want to be responsible for anyone. I don't want to make decisions. Basically I just want to stare at the TV and sleep.

On the other hand, I don't want to spend the rest of my life doing nothing.I am at a crossroads and I don't know which direction to go. Any suggestions?

Short term memory loss may be dangerous in a nursing position. Did you give that med, or did you not? Does the fact that you charted it mean you gave it, or did you chart it in anticipation of giving it but the patient refused it and you got distracted before you could chart it as refused? You're in the med room getting . . . what exactly? D50 because your patient's glucose was 25 or Fentanyl for that post op complaining of pain or the Vitamin D you forgot to bring with you that's due now? You just took that blood pressure, now what was it?

Having money is a good thing, but there may be other ways to get money. Is there something you've always wanted to do? Dad always wanted to be a Walmart greeter. (I know, crazy, right?) He'd have the opportunity to see and chat with everyone in town, he'd have a legitimate reason to get out of the house and he'd have a little spending money, too. My husband (also a nurse) retired from nursing two years ago and wants to work at West Marine, both for the social opportunities and for the employee discount on boat parts.

Sleeping and staring at the TV are fine for a few days, but not as a lifestyle. You'll probably be happier if you can get out and about. Volunteer at the library or the animal shelter or take a paid position leading tours at the museum or aquarium. If you love horses, get a job feeding them and mucking out stalls at the local stable for four hours three days a week (or whatever you can tolerate). Not needing to get paid frees you to do all sorts of things you've always been interested in but never had the time to try. A friend of a friend has a full time, non paid position as the church pastor's assistant/secretary/organizer/gofer. She's on disability so she can't get paid, but she loves being so involved in her church. My mother volunteered at the nursing home reading to residents and leading them in various crafting activities.

You can volunteer to mentor new nurses . . . I'm sure there are plenty of new nurses on this forum who could use some mentoring, someone to answer their various questions, some encouragement.

There are plenty of things you can do besides watch TV and sleep -- find something that interests you and commit to as many or as few hours as you can manage. Good luck! Let us know how you're doing.

Volunteer! You have so much to offer.

I'm thinking there might be a degree of SITUATIONAL DEPRESSION present. Retirement may not be all it's cracked up to be for some folk. To go from everyday 'with some purpose' to wake up and be somewhere on time, to do something for someone and to be PAID for it is MOTIVATION!

Then to be without that job motivator, esp when after a disappointing and/or disagreeable, (and unplanned for) job cessation, can be a source of depression. My guess is that some of OP's distress began BEFORE her resignation from her job that was so negatively stressful.

Volunteering may NOT be the answer. 'Warm fuzzies' just don't pay the bills which becomes a rude awakening whenSS & Medicare become major foci directing one's new lifestyle!

JMHO, OP's fatigue, jumbled memory loss, inactivity, etc could really be S&S of depression.

My recommendation for OP is to get checked out. Make sure there's nothing medically wrong; simple anemia, vitamin deficiency, need for a new medication or change, etc may be needed. Or there might be something more medical, but it needs to be checked out.

Feeling better health-wise might be a first step. When one is NOT hitting on all 8 cylinders, it's hard to feel 'good', physically, mentally, socially, etc.

Maybe taking a non-credit class in bread baking, ceramics or a language would help. Could just be FUN!!! And mentally and socially stimulating.

OP doesn't mention anything about social support system. (I just made a phone call to an old childhood girlfriend today on her birthday. Haven't talked in a while. Just left a message, but I feel good about it!)

Maybe a non-nsg job might be a mood elevator and provide the focus and direction and purpose desired. Although it might be tough to make that kind of change when nsg has been THE career for 45 years.

Let me just say for OP, that I kind of know what you're experiencing - 'been there, done that' to some degree. Will be holding good thoughts for you.

Thank you AmoLucia. You are very insightful. I think you are right.

So, to follow up, I took a 6 week vacation which I sorely needed. I feel MUCH better.And I decided to do an easy private duty case which won't stress me out. Salary and no stress. Win Win.