I'm almost in tears right now and don't know what to do. I have been a stay-at-home mom for 5 years now with a 4-year-old and 1-year-old. I have always wanted to work in obstetrics; however, I wanted a family first. Now that my baby is getting older I am interested in taking the pre-reqs for either an ADN program or an LPN and then bridge to ADN...depending on issues with my closest school.
I was talking to a "friend" who is always pretty negative about stuff. I was telling her about my plan to enroll for the pre-reqs soon and she was like...
"You do know that it's very competitive to get in, right?"
"High school is different than college. College is a lot different and a lot harder."
"Those people competing aren't going to be high school students. They're going to be wives and mothers and people who work that are going to be competing for your spot."
"I'm just trying to inform you since I've been there."
"I'm just telling you because I live in reality and you are dreamy."
"It doesn't matter that you had a 3.8 in high school...if there are 250 people with 4.0's trying to get into the same program and end up with 4.0's on the pre-reqs."
I told her exactly how I felt about all that she said. I felt like she was saying, "You're too stupid. Don't apply." I feel like people, usually my husband, always try to make me feel stupid or uneducated. I was in the top 5% in high school! I feel like I am a smart girl and I feel like I can do it. Does it make me nervous that there is such competition? Sure. Does it make me want to do something else? No. Do I think I'll be accepted the first try? I hope so! I told her how I felt and she just said she was trying to help and that I was being sensitive. If she was just trying to help, she could have said something like, "Well, just make sure you do as well as you can on your pre-reqs since it's competitive." But no, everything I said she kept saying something against it.
I have to admit that I am a little discouraged now and am doubting my abilities now. But, and no offense to anyone...she has an AD in Business Administration. I'm sorry, but that is NOT the same thing as nursing!! My husband occasionally makes me feel stupid because I stay at home and have no degree. But I am a smart girl! I'm not stupid! I just want to shout that to the world. Just because I did things in a different order doesn't mean I'm stupid and incapable of getting a 4.0 on my pre-reqs and getting into a nursing program! God...why do people have to try to beat you down??? :crying2:
You have to realize that you may not actually start the nursing program until your child is almost in kindergarten anyways. It took me 2 years from start to finish to get into the nursing program, but for many people it takes several years. I don't mean to sound discouraging, I am just giving you another perspective. You could meet both your goals by taking time on your prereqs and staying home and then begin applying once you either feel more comfortable with the idea of daycare, or your child gets closer to going to school. And you could even ease your children into daycare by having them go once or twice a week when you have to attend classes on campus.
I just graduated as an RN and I really regret the time I wasted listening to other people's c*** about how hard it was to get in.
Don't listen to them and keep working toward your goals because now that I've reached my goal- I can look back and see that it wasn't all that difficult school wise... the hard part for me was to believe in myself and not let other people get you down.
:madface:please don't let others opinions get in the way of your journey in this life. it doesn't matter how old you are, how many kids you have, and unfortunately it doesn't matter if even friends and family don't understand your dreams and goals. (although it would be nice wouldn't it?)
i am 44, have 4 sons, 19,17,11, 9...have also been a stay at home mom....and over the last two years, just started to take two classes a semester, also starting with online classes. i really didn't have full support from family members...my mother not wanting to "hear about that school stuff talk, why do you put yourself through all this work ???"! well, i had a 4.0 gpa going through these pre-reqs, and ended up with a 3.94 when i applied this spring to our community college's rn program....much to my surprise i was accepted!!! (extreme shock!)
i just want to say that you can do this! there have been many negative opinions sent my way...i ignored all and kept on plugging away. funny, after time people see that you are serious and that their negative vibes just aren't going to shake you. you know what? they start praising you and will tell you, " wow! you're really pulling this off! i knew you could do it!!" ()
2 years flew by..and i'm hoping the next 2 in the program do too!!!
you will be a fantastic role model to your children!!! i'm hoping my boys will know as they get older that just because they may make some mistakes, or don't achieve the things they want to achieve at a young age; there is always tomorrow and you can pick up and start over at any time in life. you can achieve anything you want , you really can. of course there will be people that are naysayers..but they are just worried and scared because of change..you will become stronger and smarter than ever and you will then change and gain so much self esteem---that threatens some. they'll come around. and if they don't, that's ok too, you will be so proud of yourself and you will empower yourself...you wont need others to define you.
i was an average student in high school, i surprised myself with my grades! (20+ years later) you can do it too!!! my school accepted 3.4 gpa and above as well as the results of the tease, our nursing entrance exam.
take it one class at a time, start with online then gradually add a class ...you'll be amazed at just what you can accomplish! by the time you are finished with the pre-req's, if you do it slowly like i did, your little ones will be in 1st grade/preschool and you'll find it easier to take more classes.
dont give up---i wish i had support when i started...but it's kinda funny to watch others opinions change right before your eyes while they witness you forging ahead and acheiving great things!!
take care and do what's right for you!!! lisa:heartbeat
i wasn't there to hear the conversation with your friend, but I'm going to go against the "advice" given to you in this thread
I was talking to a "friend" who is always pretty negative about stuff. I was telling her about my plan to enroll for the pre-reqs soon and she was like...
"You do know that it's very competitive to get in, right?"
"High school is different than college. College is a lot different and a lot harder."
"Those people competing aren't going to be high school students. They're going to be wives and mothers and people who work that are going to be competing for your spot."
"I'm just trying to inform you since I've been there."
"It doesn't matter that you had a 3.8 in high school...if there are 250 people with 4.0's trying to get into the same program and end up with 4.0's on the pre-reqs."
These are all true statements. Real friends are not ones who blindly encourage you and tell you "you will do great, don't worry!" even though they know it will be a real challenge, and not at all easy or a cakewalk.
I don't choose to surround myself with people who unthinkingly encourage me and tell me what I want to hear. That isn't a good idea and is basically what everyone in this thread is doing, unfortunately. They don't know you, I'm assuming. The people that do know you are apparently telling you to be careful, that this will be difficult. That is good, sound advice.
Now, understand I would never be friends with someone who constantly crapped all over everything I thought and wanted to do. That's different than this. She didn't say you were stupid. She didn't say you 'couldn't do it' and I'm betting neither did your husband. I bet he told you similar things to what your friend told you. That it would be HARD, and difficult.
It is hard, and a LOT of people don't make even make it to the point where they even qualify to apply for the program. Don't kid yourself into thinking otherwise. However, if you really want to be a nurse, it's the only way. You'll feel better about yourself for having gone through the experience, and knowing that you really conquered something tough and difficult, and lived to tell about it.
That's worth more than a lot of empty/meaningless compliments from people who aren't really considering what you've said or are going through, right?
Flame away, but so far in my life, I've found what I'm saying to be true time and time agian.
it all depends on how you perceive your situation, if you CHOOSE to perceive yourself in one way, it will be like a self fufulling prophecy...you really have the will to do whatever you would truly like but it is up to you to truly realize that regardless of your circumstances...if people tell you negative things about you or the career path you may be after, you shouldnt internalize what they say and at the least, you should see it as even more motivation to work harder to accomplish want you want. When you really put things into perspective, you will realize that you have it in you to do what you want and get the grades that you want to get into nursing school, its more about determination, and again as I cant stress enough PERCEPTION and will power. Regardless of what had happened yesterday, what will happen tommorow, what may happen today, you have the choice to feel the way you do and perceive your circumstances in whatever way, your attitude and the way u feel is up to you!. Now go out there and achieve!!! think strategically and DONT let anything hold you back, NOTHING !!! i know it sounds simple, and it really is, just focus on your perception of things and how you evaluate your thoughts..dont be obstructed by the negative,because all that does is hold you back!
I would just like to share with you that it is not good to let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. When I started getting serious about having an education and a career, I started with getting my GED. I later went to my nearest community college graduated in 3 yrs. with a double degree in Liberal Arts & Sciences and in Health Studies. I later applied to a graduate degree Master of Divinity Program and got accepted without a bachelors. In addition, in 2002 I got my doctoral degree in Theology. I am now pursuing my bachelors in nursing. Lastly, my grade pt. avg. is a 3.3. If I can do it, you can too. Now, stop talking to people who make you feel small (its due to their insecurities, when you arise) and talk to those who will sharpen your gift and leadership abilities. Remember, iron sharpens iron.
First of all, do not listen to this "so-called friend". She is expressing her own insecurities on you! Let me tell you my story...I too was a stay at home mom for 17 years...found myself in the middle of a nasty divorce with 3 sons, ages 9, 11, and 13. I was not a great student in high school, and dropped out of college after two years because I was bored, and hated it. I enrolled in the community college, did my pre-req's and got into the nursing program on the first shot. Yes, it was hard, but I loved it! I met new friends with similar interests, and we encouraged each other to push forward and succeed. Do not be discouraged, if this is a dream of yours to become a nurse, by all means move forward to attain that goal! To let you know how my story worked out...I graduated from the AA degree with honors,and a GPA of 3.8. Than after working for a few years, I went back and got my BSN, with a GPA of 4.0, and recently graduated with my MSN - GPA of 3.92. And my ex-husband always made me feel stupid too because I never finished college the first time and chose to stay home with my sons! If you find something you enjoy, you will excel at it, and when you do your self-confidence will soar! Do not give up on your dreams...nursing is a wonderful career choice, especially with a family as it allows for flexibility with your schedule, and the capacity to support yourself. GO FOR IT!
PS...I was 40 when I became a RN, so you are never too old!
Well seems like your dedicated. The good thing about pre requisites is that they have classes in the morning, afternoon, or evening that you can choose from. Another thing you want to keep in mind is that nursing is competitive but as long as you have the drive and determination then you will get in. I am not a competitive person and I know my GPA is not in the top ranking. So I applied to several and all colleges and I did get in. I do not worry about which school I go to as long as I get in because when they need nurses they do not stop and ask which school you went to. I have been in school on several different occasions I am now 30. Have a BA degree and Certificate in Medical Assistant and now I am back in school for nursing. Friends say I will be in college for ever and I just say well at least I know I will be learning forever and as they say you learn everyday. So do not give up and just make sure you do what you do for you. And as far as anything goes think about if you ended up all alone at least you have a career in the end something and didnt let time pass you by. Cause no one can waist your time but you.
Don't listen to those naysayers! Sure, it's competitive, sure it's hard work. You may or may not get in to nursing school the first time. You know what--you're definitely not going to get in if you don't ever attempt it.
I'm really annoyed by the fact that your husband makes you feel dumb for being a stay at home mom without a degree. One of the greatest things a woman can do with her life is raise her children! My mom's a former stay at home mom (all of us kids are grown up and out of the house) without a degree and she's one of the smartest people I know.
Yes, it will be hard. Yes, you may run into a brick wall. But if you don't try won't you always wonder? I know for me that's what it is. I'm scared to death but I know that when I'm 90, even if I never was a nurse, I'll KNOW I tried. I started taking classes at the community college when I was 18. In those days I didn't get financial aid and was paying for classes myself so could really only afford to take 1 or 2 classes at a time. I had people laugh in my face and tell me I should get loans but I didn't listen. A year and a half ago I had a baby. I took a break and then this last fall I went back to school. This time I got financial aid. So I worked full time (bills, bills, bills), and went to school full time. It was hard! There were days I saw my daughter for 2 hours. Those were the worse! But now I'm 24, have all the pre-reqs under my belt. I got my acceptance letter recently. I didn't have a 4.0. More around a 3.5. In September I'll be going to school full time, working part time, and raising my daughter. I'm really excited that I can cut back on my hours at work. I realize I'll be really busy with school work but it will be stuff that really applies to my dream being a nurse. I'm pursuing my dream.
I suggest you take it one step at a time. Take your pre-reqs first, before you worry about getting into the program.
Pursue your dreams. YES it will be hard. Yes sacrifices will be made. But it will be worth it. You won't have to wonder what if.
I do think that people are discouraging becasue they worry about changes. People don't like change. If you become a nurse, things WILL change.
I did things "backwards" too! I started my rereqs with a 2 year old and a 7 year old. I finally got into a program 4 years later.... and now I graduate in 10 months!! What you do is up to you... There will always be people trying to drag you down and steal your joy. Why is your husband so negative and hateful? I couldn't have gone this far without the support of my husband. And believe me, you are going to need his support once you get into a program and the real fun begins! Keep your chin up and keep us posted! You are an amzing role models for your kids!!
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Cilantrophobe
704 Posts
You have to realize that you may not actually start the nursing program until your child is almost in kindergarten anyways. It took me 2 years from start to finish to get into the nursing program, but for many people it takes several years. I don't mean to sound discouraging, I am just giving you another perspective. You could meet both your goals by taking time on your prereqs and staying home and then begin applying once you either feel more comfortable with the idea of daycare, or your child gets closer to going to school. And you could even ease your children into daycare by having them go once or twice a week when you have to attend classes on campus.