Why Does Nursing Eat Its Young?

Charles S. Smith, RN, MS · Jan 28, 2001

I, too, have heard, felt, witnessed, experienced the feeding frenzy around new and/or inexperienced staff memebers. Over the last 30 years, I have come to understand that RNs are HUMAN first and nurses second. Is this an important consideration? For me, yes, because it lends some plausible explanation to the issue of personal destruction of other people. I have found that the unhappy nurses are just as unhappy outside of nursing, that the nurses with personality issues in the workplace have just as many issues outside the workplace, but somehow these negative issues in the workplace get rewarded. We were taught as nursing students to treat the patient with dignity, but somehow missed the fact that all persons, including our nursing colleagues, must be treated with dignity and respect too. Simple, honest, open, direct communication is the easiest way to combat the negativity, but the hardest to learn. But it must start with the individual. I can not take responsibility for any one else but me or blame any one else for my shortcomings. Somehow we, as a group, have lost the ability to look inside for answers. In fact, we may even function at the level of "the oppressed group" behaviorally. I work on me first and hope that my role modeling of positive behaviors (as I learn and enact them) gives others pause to reflect.

regards

Chas

susanmary · Jan 30, 2001

Chas: Enjoyed your insightful and meaningful post. Hope every nurse reads it! It's true that we are responsible for our actions. Nurses that eat their own, nurses that are mean spirited and hell bent on hurting other nurses are, I'm certain, the same way outside the workplace. We all own our actions and behaviors. We can continue to work on ourselves and be positive role models for nursing -- we can't control others actions/behaviors -- only our own. I know it's a cliche, but a little kindness goes a long way. Have a great day.

Charles S. Smith, RN, MS · Jan 30, 2001

Originally posted by susanmary:
Chas: Enjoyed your insightful and meaningful post. Hope every nurse reads it! It's true that we are responsible for our actions. Nurses that eat their own, nurses that are mean spirited and hell bent on hurting other nurses are, I'm certain, the same way outside the workplace. We all own our actions and behaviors. We can continue to work on ourselves and be positive role models for nursing -- we can't control others actions/behaviors -- only our own. I know it's a cliche, but a little kindness goes a long way. Have a great day.

It is never a cliche to speak truth SusanMary..great insight!! The Golden Rule still applies in my life....and i sense it does in yours!

Thanx

chas

[This message has been edited by Charles S. Smith, RN, MS (edited January 30, 2001).]

Natalie25 · Jan 30, 2001

Some people are mean spirited. We women allow gossiping to get way out of hand. If you here nurses talk trash about another nurse, you have to assume that someone is going to talk trash about you. It's not just nurses. You have a responsibility to not engage in that kind of trash talking. Don't act like you're interested and don't feed the fire. Sooner or later, most of the trash talkers will get the message. Especially if you confront them on it or address the general problem at a staff meeting.

In the ER I work in, trash talking is kept at a minimum and the general working environment is wonderful here. In fact, I love my job here! And I have worked in a few different areas. Teamwork = Job satisfaction!! Love and Respect eachother as if you were part of a big family :-)

EMT_125 · Mar 6, 2001

Hello all. I am an EMT-B and just started as a PCT. I will be starting nursing school next spring. I have found that a few nurses are cold or indifferent towards me and other EMT's. At first I was kinda put off by this. I have made it a point that no matter how cold, mean, or indifferent a nurse is to me, I will still smile at him/her and wish them a great night. Well, wouldn't you know it, after a couple of weeks of this, they actually go out of their way to say hi, and they all seem to be really nice to me now. I feel that as long as you do your job, don't get the "I know it all" attitude, and be friendly to them no matter what, you will get the same in return. And most importantly, you won't be one of the eaten.

------------------

Don't meddle in the affairs of dragons. You are crunchy and go good with ketchup.

**canoehead, BSN, RN** · Mar 7, 2001

I hope that the student that was too busy to take the vital signs does not berate the nurse when she is too busy to answer a question.

I'm surprised the inappropriateness of this response by the student is even a question.

tonie · Mar 8, 2001

I am a second year ADN student in North Carolina. After reading these posts, I don't feel all of the fault lies with the experienced nurses. A lot depends on the attitude of the new nurse or student in the situation. New people have to realize that they are going into a situation where the ground rules are already pretty well established. Too many students go into a clinical area with one of two attitudes: either I know it all and don't need your help, or they go hide in a corner and hope to melt into the wood work. If all students could go into the clinical arena with a learning and helpful attitude, many problems could be circumvented all together.

jamistlc · May 3, 2001

Originally posted by EMT_125:
Hello all. I am an EMT-B and just started as a PCT. I will be starting nursing school next spring. I have found that a few nurses are cold or indifferent towards me and other EMT's. At first I was kinda put off by this. I have made it a point that no matter how cold, mean, or indifferent a nurse is to me, I will still smile at him/her and wish them a great night. Well, wouldn't you know it, after a couple of weeks of this, they actually go out of their way to say hi, and they all seem to be really nice to me now. I feel that as long as you do your job, don't get the "I know it all" attitude, and be friendly to them no matter what, you will get the same in return. And most importantly, you won't be one of the eaten.

Totally agree! :)

res04lly · May 8, 2001

EMT-125 you have found the secret to stopping the eating of our young. I have been around nursing close to 25 years first as an aide and then as an LPN. In the 16 years i have seen alot of eating but it has to do alot with attitude. As someone new to the field of nursing the biggest benefit you have is to Listen to what your mentor is saying to you. Listening is a form of respect and that you are hearing what is being said by acknowledgement. I have read many posts on this bb and the mentors are frustrated because they can not get the feedback that they need to know that they are truely getting the job done that management has given them. I believe that if you respect someones experience and knowledge base that pretty much takes care of the eating, it is when the individual feels that the person being mentor is not Hearing them based on not listening that the problem of Eating comes into play. Years ago i learned to listen, i worked with the mentally ill and i had to listen, really listen to what it was they were saying because they talked to me from their world,and i would get my peices of information as they chose to give it to me. I took that and used this listening concept especially in any new job that i have taken and I have not been eaten.

res04lly · May 8, 2001

To add an addition to my previous posts, We as nurses MUST stop the nursing schools from telling the new student We eat our young.I remember being told that my first day of school and it is really intimadating and it sets up a US verus Them type responce. As Nursing Educators you can stop this right at the very get go by not telling this to your students, they have enough on their plates without worrying if someone will eat them. I feel that is a cruel statement to use to put fear or intimadation into a student. They will be less willing to ask questions and be less eager to learn if this statement is in the back of their mind. I also think the positive and negative aspects of the job should also be taught-that we don't have 2-3 patients, some nights i have 10 and they have multiple problems not just one or two. give them the benefit of knowing what they are walking into before they go threw the program and then realize this is Not what I thought it would be, or this not like i learned in school. The educators of this profession could really help the profession by being really honest and then the students don't have culture shock when they walk into a nursing home and have 15-30 patients they are responsible for, or go to the hospital and have 8-10 really sick people. As an Educator you can stop the cycle before it begins.

fiestynurse · May 8, 2001

I have never understood exactly what "eating your young" means. I have not witnessed this as being that prevalent. What we do to our old is much worse!!

jamistlc · May 10, 2001

Originally posted by res04lly:
To add an addition to my previous posts, We as nurses MUST stop the nursing schools from telling the new student We eat our young.I remember being told that my first day of school and it is really intimadating and it sets up a US verus Them type responce. As Nursing Educators you can stop this right at the very get go by not telling this to your students, they have enough on their plates without worrying if someone will eat them. I feel that is a cruel statement to use to put fear or intimadation into a student. They will be less willing to ask questions and be less eager to learn if this statement is in the back of their mind. I also think the positive and negative aspects of the job should also be taught-that we don't have 2-3 patients, some nights i have 10 and they have multiple problems not just one or two. give them the benefit of knowing what they are walking into before they go threw the program and then realize this is Not what I thought it would be, or this not like i learned in school. The educators of this profession could really help the profession by being really honest and then the students don't have culture shock when they walk into a nursing home and have 15-30 patients they are responsible for, or go to the hospital and have 8-10 really sick people. As an Educator you can stop the cycle before it begins.

15-30 pts! Where? Here I have had up to 50 pts at one time and even as an experienced nurse it is a shock! :eek: