Why would they ask if I have kids????

mariedoreen · Aug 12, 2004

maggie,
i don't know if it's a legal question but whoever asks is probably wondering if your children are going to be an interference while you're in school;
if there are going to be issues with babysitting, time for studying or anything else that can potentially take away from your schooling.
again, i don't know if this illegal what they're asking.
good luck.
leslie

None of their business. Questions like this are not legal when it comes to issues of employment because the answer is often used as a basis for whether or not to give the applicant a position.. ie the reasons you described above: will there be issues with babysitting, will these children take the mother away from her work, interfere with her commitment to the job etc.. it is completely discriminatory. As such, questions like these also have no place in a nursing interview. I would be incensed if the school I was applying with used that information in any way to make their decision!! I would be very interested to hear the viewpoint of a nursing educator on this one... How, exactly, do you justify such a question? How do you justify basing a decision of admittance on whether or not the applicant-parent (who has worked just as hard or harder than other applicants to get to this point) makes it into the program?

Gitane56 · Aug 12, 2004

I was an executive for years in an unrelated field and during interviews we could not ask if someone had children. (if they volunteered the information, that's a different story...) If that's the case, WHY ask if you have kids if you in a nursing school interview??? Should that have bearing on whether I am qualified to be a nurse? Am I crazy for thinking this way? I hate to "buck" the system but I also don't see the relevance. Someone enlighten me please...

Yes they do ask if you have children. Are you interviewing for an L.V.N. spot ?

The reason is because they want your attention. Once the class starts you have so many days to drop . If you choose to drop it would be very difficult for someone else to come in and catch up. Chances are that seat will stay open the rest of the year and that isn't good for the school.

Having children increases the odds you will drop. Nursing school is very demanding .

Good Luck!

Gitane56 · Aug 12, 2004

Furthermore , most schools have an attendance policy. When I was in school a nursing student was pemitted to miss 3 days a semester ...period. If you missed more then 3 days you were *out* . Having children increases the chances of you missing more then 3 days....your *out* the seat stays empty....blah blah blah. I believe it is legal for them to ask the question after all the whole idea is to find *the best* possible students that can be taught and will pass the class.

mariedoreen · Aug 12, 2004

I believe it is legal for them to ask the question after all the whole idea is to find *the best* possible students that can be taught and will pass the class.

You know if you really think about it a mother has had to work a lot harder to get to the point of application than say... a 20 year old with few responsibilities because they're still being supported by mom and dad (bring on the flames). They have to juggle the needs of their children, their relationship with their spouse, running a home with or without help from that spouse, their schoolwork and often... their job. If you're looking for the "best" applicant then the reality is that this applicant has had to work a heck of a lot harder and has demonstrated an even greater ability to stick to her goals than those applicants who aren't juggling nearly the balls that mom is. So, I find it downright insulting to say that because a woman has children they should be passed over in place of someone who doesn't because they may eventually drop the program due to "the added stress." (Which seems to beg the question..... WHAT DECADE ARE WE IN???!!)

Give me a break! Whether this is a perceived reality or not, it is discrimination pure and simple. There is a good reason why we have laws against such things!

lynn27 · Aug 12, 2004

During one of my 2 interviews for medical school, I was also asked if I had kids, my back up plans for my kids and also, "How do you think you'll manage at your age?" I was a whopping 32 years old and had always looked younger than my years--later I got carded for buying beer at 35y. I felt that these were unethical questions and became annoyed with my interviewer, especially since I realized that I was in a no-win situation. First, a strike against me for having kids/ my age...or if I refused to answer, then I became a hostile applicant. Anyway, now much older (and looking every day of it), I realize that they were wanting my answers AND my reaction. As you can imagine--I didn't get into medical school and became thoroughly disgusted with the interview process--which I now feel is a blessing because there is no way I would want MD hours. So, my advice would be to go into the nursing school interviews expecting questions like these and plan for them. That way, you'll feel totally prepared and will feel confident.

Quickbeam, BSN, RN · Aug 12, 2004

Nursing school isn't employment. I think the schools that ask do so because they have seen so many people drop out due to lack of backup planning for their children. I saw that a lot at my school. My school was pretty rigid on absenteeism and a lot of the moms felt that this didn't apply to them. Quite a few lost a term or had to take clinicals over again because of child care problems or sick kid days.

It might be smarter for the school to put the information together as a handout and include it in a packet for interested students.

CNMtobe2012 · Aug 12, 2004

Quck question, what do you say when you go on an interview as a new grad for your first job and you ask do you plan to continue your education in the next 2 years? This is interesting to me because I do plan on going back about a year after I graduate to get my MSN. But do I tell my potential employer this?

Quickbeam, BSN, RN · Aug 12, 2004

Honestly, I wouldn't tell anyone that. You could say that you are interested in continuing your education but need clinical experience or something like that. But I'd never commit my future plans to a recruiter. None of their business.

Furball · Aug 12, 2004

I had a very different experience......

I was also asked if I had kids...I said "yes" and then received a stack of information for quality childcare in the area including the childcare center on campus. :)

Quickbeam, BSN, RN · Aug 12, 2004

Good point, Furball. I don't think it is meant to be a negative or disqualifying question. I think often it is a service question about meeting student needs.

NewEnglandRN, RN · Aug 12, 2004

When I recently interviewed for a work/ scholarship program. I was not asked if I had children, but volunteered the information. I told them how supportive my children are about my return to school...

I'll even admit to taking out a photograph of children and passing it around! It was a very relaxed, informal atmosphere and I had worked there before. My former radiography clincal instructor stopped by before my interview which is how the photograph was brought up.

Hopefully they don't think it was too weird! But I love my children.

Michelle

MistyDreamer · Aug 12, 2004

A similar situation happened to me, only I had asked to sit out a term to care for my hubby after back surgery (he was in a fusion brace and could not get up on his own). I was told I needed to get my priorities straight if I wanted to be a nurse. I was already an LPN at the time. I told them I felt that my priorities were in the correct order and that I would reapply when my husband was better. 1 year later I was back in school (they couldn't deny me, my grade avg. was 4.0) and now I have graduated. Sometimes you just have to stand firm. Good luck to you in school.