When Others Say You Aren't Right For Nursing

[purplegal]

I am sure that many of us have come across someone who doesn't agree with our career choice. You could be the perfect person for a job, but still, there will be some naysayer who says something like, "I don't see you in that position," or "That doesn't seem like the right career for you."

The thing is, how much should one consider other people's opinions when choosing their career? With most careers, other's opinions wouldn't matter greatly, as people's lives generally wouldn't be directly affected. Advice for people seeking non-nursing careers would be something such as "You have to do the job, and enjoy what you're doing. Don't listen to others if this is what you truly want to do."

With that said, nursing is a bit different. When you are a nurse, you are directly impacting patient's lives. That is the best--and the worst part of the profession. Anything you do can and will affect the patient, either positively, or negatively. Therefore, it seems like other people's opinions if you may matter more, especially if they come from those who are already successful nurses.

One person saying that they don't see you as a nurse may not be that big of a deal. Some people simply won't see our value, or what we can contribute. However, if you have had multiple people suggest you find a different career, should you pay attention to their opinions? If others have had concerns about your ability to perform the job safely, is it worth it to consider their thoughts? If more than one person has seen you struggle with aspects of the profession, is it a sign that nursing is not right for you?

More questions to ponder:

-Would you consider the opinion of ANYONE who says you should not be a nurse?

-Would you value the opinions of other nurses more than those who are not in the profession?

-How many people who are opposed to your being in nursing would it take for you to step back from your career?

-If you struggle with nursing, and others have noticed, should you continue to push forth anyway, in the event that you truly want to be a nurse?

-Would you ignore other people's opinions and simply pursue the career because it is the one you want, keeping in mind that the safety of patients may be affected?

With not all of our fellow nurses being encouraging, it seems worth it to discuss how much of their opinions, if at all, should affect our decision to continue nursing.

[Been there,done that, ASN, RN]

For most jobs, I would agree. However, is it good for someone who struggles clinically to continue on in nursing, when they are directly impacting people's lives, possibly resulting in death? Someone can continue to believe that they will be a good nurse, but if others are observing issues with their performance, should their opinions be taken into any account at all?

The only opinions that matter are your colleagues and management.

If you are "struggling" with your clinical decisions.. there is the problem.

What are the issues with your performance?

[Libby1987]

If most of my friends and family expressed concern about me being a nurse, I'm sure there would be a common theme between them and I'd give it consideration to what they were saying, or at least I would now. Immature? Flakey? Wilting flower? And whether I could do anything about it.

If I had more than one credible professional take issue with my ability to practice, hell yeah I would pay attention. First I would be crushed, then I would again consider the issues pointed out and whether I could do anything about it.

I had some negative feedback when I was new. I was very young and emotionally immature. I could pass tests with basic effort and I was responsible with things like promptness but I was a late bloomer and at 22 I was a bit of a silly girl.

But it was fixable. A couple of come to Jesus moments and I was startled into growing up and being more present at work. I grew up quickly in a short period of time and it's all worked out. I'm a very good nurse in my field. Thank goodness I heeded the constructive criticism even though it was hard to hear after growing up coddled.

Had I blown it off and made no changes, it would have been disastrous and I would have limped out of an unsuccessful career.

Self examination with some mediation to keep it from going sideways might help you.

[Paschurr]

When I first started in nursing I heard a lot of comments like that. Not to me personally but that "new graduates don't belong here". A lot of nurses think that you should start out in Med Surg and then move onto a more complex specialty. Now that I am 8 years in, I have mixed feelings about it. It wasn't necessary to have that experience but it would have made my life a little bit easier. In regards to the comment in general, nurses are just really mean to each other I don't understand it.

[NurseOnAMotorcycle, ASN, RN]

When I was in nursing school I had several instructors tell me that they didn't think I was going to do well as a nurse. Most of those instructors were in particular specialties such as long-term care, MedSurg, OR. I graduated nursing school and ended up in the emergency room. I was such a perfect fit for it that I can't imagine ever having considered not being a nurse. I love my job and I'm good at it.

Nursing needs as many different personality types as you can ever imagine. Outgoing, introverted, nights, days, weekends, family types, singles, travelers, stay at homes, loves kids, loves the elderly, loves doing paperwork, hates doing paperwork, tough and gritty, snuggly and comforting, etc. Don't listen to somebody who prefers to work in long-term care tell you that you would be a terrible nurse because you could be perfect for a different specialty. You just have to find it.