What I am Taking This Summer (Is it too much?)

austin heart, BSN, RN · May 27, 2005

Well that is very harsh, and my son isable to entertain himself for long periods of time, and usually doesn't like to be disturbed. And if he is he'll basically have an over stimulation break down, because of an outside source. I never ever said that I "stick them in a bouncer by themselves all day in front of the TV and not enjoy them?", or anything of that nature. He swings in his swing every now and then, an I sit him there so that he can look through his books. And I don't happen to believe "A child's emotional and physical development depends entirely on their parents and the amount of time spent with them."Yes emotionally they need affirmamations, but physically I think most or atleast some can learn on there own. For instance my son learned how to roll from his back to his tummy and push up on his hands (not his arms but his hands kind of like a push up)when he was about 10 weeks. That he stumbled on himself since I had been at the time trying to stop him from rolling, as directed by his doctor for his head. He did it on his own. I don't believe in "babying", I do however believe in quality time and teaching which is a big difference from a child totally relying on their parent to learn. My mother didn't baby me, and I think I developed well, after all I graduated from high school at 15 with honors, my brother graduated at 16 with honors, and a full scholarship to Tulane University, from where he graduated with a BS in Biomedical Engineering, and continued on to grade school at Purdee University, where he will be graduating this December with a Doctorate in Biomedical Engineering. So for children who were left to our own devices, and to teach ourselves, I think that we did pretty well.
My son has a mixture of qualities. On one had he likes to be left alone to work, as I do, and on the otherhand he likes to be with and around people to learn and interact. And with that said I will raise him accordingly.

Ok then, here is me being harsh again.......The more you post the sadder it sounds for your child. You DID say that you left your child alone for up to 4 hours at a time with a book or in front of the TV. My son can not even go an hour with out a diaper change. Pushing up on their hands while on their tummy is normal development for a 10 week old so that is not anything special (sorry). I just can not imagine a 4 month old wanting to be in your words "left alone to work". One has to wonder due to your course load if that is what YOU want him to do. I don't believe spending time and interacting with your child is "babying" them, especially at that age. And I do disagree again with you, as I think that others here will too, when you say that a child's emotional and physical development does not depends on the parents and how much time they spend with them. At that age they are unable to do anything for themselves. I don't know, I may be off base here. I just think as a mother of a 4 month old myself, that this is just sad.

GrnHonu99, RN · May 27, 2005

Human Anat & Physi 1 (CCCONLINE)
Human Anat & Physi II (CCCONLINE)
ORGANIC AND INORGANIC CHEMISTRY (CCCONLINE)
Microbiology (ECE)
English Conp (I & II) (ECE)
Life Span Psyc (ECE)
General Psyc (CLEP)
Is this too much. Well if it is I will just be studying my a$$ off because I have no choice. DO ya'll think that I can do it.

Good Luck!! if you are really committed you can do anything!!!!! I dont have any kids or work(so i may not be able to relate as well to your situation since ive never had kids), but I am taking a LOAD of classes! im taking

AP2 (with lab/same class)

MICROBIO(with lab same class)

PATHOPHYSIOLOGY

PHARMACOLOGY

HEALTH ASSESMENT

HEALTH ASSESSMENT LAB (diff. class from health assessment)

PHARM LAB (again totally seperate class)

PROFESSIONAL ROLES AND ISSUES

NURSING SKILLS LAB

im in class about 50 hours a week and the rest of the time i spend studying (literally)...lol i have no life but for me its worth and it can be done!! im doin great so far and soon itll all be worth it...long story short...if there is a will there is a way! make sure your time management skills are primo and that everyone around you is very supportive or you dont have a prayer! you have to be committed and completely focused! oh and most importantly DONT GET BEHIND!!!!!!!!!

good luck!

Jess RN · May 28, 2005

double post, sorry.

Jess RN · May 28, 2005

Ok then, here is me being harsh again.......The more you post the sadder it sounds for your child. You DID say that you left your child alone for up to 4 hours at a time with a book or in front of the TV. My son can not even go an hour with out a diaper change. Pushing up on their hands while on their tummy is normal development for a 10 week old so that is not anything special (sorry). I just can not imagine a 4 month old wanting to be in your words "left alone to work". One has to wonder due to your course load if that is what YOU want him to do. I don't believe spending time and interacting with your child is "babying" them, especially at that age. And I do disagree again with you, as I think that others here will too, when you say that a child's emotional and physical development does not depends on the parents and how much time they spend with them. At that age they are unable to do anything for themselves. I don't know, I may be off base here. I just think as a mother of a 4 month old myself, that this is just sad.

You know what- I don't dissagree with you here- but judging other's parenting decisions doesn't really change much. I think it's unlikely that the OP will decrease her courseload or change the way she cares for her child based on advice/criticism from an online forum. So, for me personally, I try to avoid being so judgemental.

To the OP- 4 hrs is a looooong time for a young baby to entertain themself. Even if he will let you leave him on his own entertaining himself now at 4 mo, I doubt that will be the case in a month or two. You will be surprized the first time he "follows you" by rolling from one room to another. Or when you leave him on one spot on the floor and come back in a few minutes and he's hanging out under the dining room table! It is wild- because when they are so little I kind of think of them as potted plants- but then all of a sudden one day they are on the move!

Enjoy your little one and good luck with whatever you choose!

-Jess

LydiaNN · May 28, 2005

You know what- I don't dissagree with you here- but judging other's parenting decisions doesn't really change much. I think it's unlikely that the OP will decrease her courseload or change the way she cares for her child based on advice/criticism from an online forum. So, for me personally, I try to avoid being so judgemental.
To the OP- 4 hrs is a looooong time for a young baby to entertain themself. Even if he will let you leave him on his own entertaining himself now at 4 mo, I doubt that will be the case in a month or two. You will be surprized the first time he "follows you" by rolling from one room to another. Or when you leave him on one spot on the floor and come back in a few minutes and he's hanging out under the dining room table! It is wild- because when they are so little I kind of think of them as potted plants- but then all of a sudden one day they are on the move!
Enjoy your little one and good luck with whatever you choose!
-Jess

The OP did ask for opinions, and part of what we are basing our responses on is what she has volunteered about her parenting style. I am not sure it is fair to label these responses as being judgmental. It all plays in to the answer of the original question, which was "it is too much?" I also have to add to the OP, I thought it was interesting when you said you don't believe in "babying" your child. Your child IS a baby! Anecdotes aside, research has consistently shown that babies' brains develop most fully when they receive lots of one on one engagement. Those synapses are forming as we speak!

Jess RN · May 28, 2005

The OP did ask for opinions, and part of what we are basing our responses on is what she has volunteered about her parenting style. I am not sure it is fair to label these responses as being judgmental. It all plays in to the answer of the original question, which was "it is too much?" I also have to add to the OP, I thought it was interesting when you said you don't believe in "babying" your child. Your child IS a baby! Anecdotes aside, research has consistently shown that babies' brains develop most fully when they receive lots of one on one engagement. Those synapses are forming as we speak!

The OP didn't even originally make note of the fact she had a 4 mo old when asking the question "is this too much?" in her original post. Someone else brought it up because of her screen name. Sorry, but I do think your earlier post's tone was pretty judgmental. And honestly, I think that must have been intentional on your part, given your opinions and information you offer about early childhood development.

I guess my point is- I don't really think people change how they do things based on other people's opinions of how they should do them. Especially when those opinions are shared by people you don't know, in fairly anonymous online forums. Parenting involves tons of really personal decisions. It's easy to judge, much harder to really know the circumstances under which people are doing their best to raise their kids. Kids should never watch TV. Agreed, in a perfect world. But putting baby mozart on for a half hour so you can get a shower or make dinner or finish a thought for the first time all day is far from a crime. Sorry, this hits a nerve with me.

-Jess

LydiaNN · May 28, 2005

I didn't say that she mentioned her child in the original post, I said that she volunteered the information about her parenting style. Which she did. Which is why two of the posters have since expanded on their original input, based on additional information. None of which contradicts anything that I've said, thankyouverymuch.

austin heart, BSN, RN · May 28, 2005

The OP didn't even originally make note of the fact she had a 4 mo old when asking the question "is this too much?" in her original post. Someone else brought it up because of her screen name. Sorry, but I do think your earlier post's tone was pretty judgmental. And honestly, I think that must have been intentional on your part, given your opinions and information you offer about early childhood development.
I guess my point is- I don't really think people change how they do things based on other people's opinions of how they should do them. Especially when those opinions are shared by people you don't know, in fairly anonymous online forums. Parenting involves tons of really personal decisions. It's easy to judge, much harder to really know the circumstances under which people are doing their best to raise their kids. Kids should never watch TV. Agreed, in a perfect world. But putting baby mozart on for a half hour so you can get a shower or make dinner or finish a thought for the first time all day is far from a crime. Sorry, this hits a nerve with me.
-Jess

Sorry, this hits a nerve with me too. If someone does not want to "hear" someone else's opinion they SHOULD NOT ASK for opinions on an online discussion board. I am basing my opinion only on the information she provided. I am sorry if you feel that I am being judgmental, I feel that children are a gift not a given! I don't disagree with you that putting your baby in front of a baby mozart tape for half an hour so that you can take a shower or even have a moment for yourself is a crime but OP says that she leaves her child in front of the TV for up to 4 hours at a time. I feel comfortable sighting information on child development due to the fact that I have made it a priority to make sure that my son meets developmental milestones on or before the appropriate age. I also do not know how far along you are in your nursing studies but basic child development is taught in most nursing curriculums. I also agree with mercyteapot when she says research has consistently shown that babies' brains develop most fully when they receive lots of one on one engagement.

My days, or life for that matter, are planned around my son and his needs. At 4 months of age he is dependant on me and his father to meet those needs.

My son is the first thing I think about when I wake in the morning and the last thing I think about before I go to sleep. I just can't imagine feeling any other way.

DianeMyra · May 28, 2005

... but OP says that she leaves her child in front of the TV for up to 4 hours at a time. .

Excuse me, but looking at this thread I am unable to find her saying what you quote. What I do see her saying is, "He has essentially sat by himself awake for 4 hours at the longest, many times" Please copy paste where she said what you are suggesting she said. Otherwise, I believe it's time you stop bashing her. - Diane

Jess RN · May 28, 2005

Sorry, this hits a nerve with me too. If someone does not want to "hear" someone else's opinion they SHOULD NOT ASK for opinions on an online discussion board. I am basing my opinion only on the information she provided. I am sorry if you feel that I am being judgmental, I feel that children are a gift not a given! I don't disagree with you that putting your baby in front of a baby mozart tape for half an hour so that you can take a shower or even have a moment for yourself is a crime but OP says that she leaves her child in front of the TV for up to 4 hours at a time. I feel comfortable sighting information on child development due to the fact that I have made it a priority to make sure that my son meets developmental milestones on or before the appropriate age. I also do not know how far along you are in your nursing studies but basic child development is taught in most nursing curriculums. I also agree with mercyteapot when she says research has consistently shown that babies' brains develop most fully when they receive lots of one on one engagement.
My days, or life for that matter, are planned around my son and his needs. At 4 months of age he is dependant on me and his father to meet those needs.
My son is the first thing I think about when I wake in the morning and the last thing I think about before I go to sleep. I just can't imagine feeling any other way.

Wow, this is getting heated and for my part I really didn't intend it to be. I'm not interested in a flame war. The OP never said she left her baby in front of the TV for 4 hrs. I have two children myself (ages 2.9 and 9 mo) so, while I'm not an expert I'm pretty aware of the developmental milestones you refer to. Bottom line, the OP didn't ask for advice on parenting. She was asking if her planned academic schedule was "do-able". She has lots of opinions on that to consider. This parenting advice, while maybe well intentioned, can come across the wrong way. Especially when, as in your last paragraph, you imply that the OP (or me, not sure who you are comparing yourself to here) doesn't share your devotion and/or prioritization when it comes to meeting her child's needs.

Sleepy, off for the night.

-Jess

LydiaNN · May 28, 2005

Wow, this is getting heated and for my part I really didn't intend it to be. I'm not interested in a flame war. The OP never said she left her baby in front of the TV for 4 hrs. I have two children myself (ages 2.9 and 9 mo) so, while I'm not an expert I'm pretty aware of the developmental milestones you refer to. Bottom line, the OP didn't ask for advice on parenting. She was asking if her planned academic schedule was "do-able". She has lots of opinions on that to consider. This parenting advice, while maybe well intentioned, can come across the wrong way. Especially when, as in your last paragraph, you imply that the OP (or me, not sure who you are comparing yourself to here) doesn't share your devotion and/or prioritization when it comes to meeting her child's needs.
Sleepy, off for the night.
-Jess

But the fact that she has parenting responsibilities, which must and should come first, play directly into whether her proposed schedule is do-able. If she didn't have any other responsibilities, I might have said that I thought it could be done. Knowing that a 4 month old baby is involved, no way, no how.

Tweety, BSN, RN · May 28, 2005

The OP did ask for opinions.............

The OP basically has already made up her mind if you read further. I think she might have been looking more for validation than hear the answer it might not be doable.

(How many days did you last without stirring something up again? :rotfl: )