We're supposed to be perfect everday?

[TeflonNurse]

*Everyday (thanks for messing that up autocorrect)

I mean, that's it right? No mistakes, no foul ups, customer knows best, CYA x1000, smile (always smile, even though you feel like crying), *sigh*

I promise I'm not always this cynical but these new grad blues are seriously getting to me. Been off orientation for a few weeks now and it seems like every shift my Charge nurse walks up to me with something for me to sign saying we talked about it or mentioning some small (but of course important) box I didn't checkmark in my charting the last shift I worked.

I'm developing a Pavlovian response, every time I see a Charge nurse I start sweating. Hear my Unit mgr's voice and my stomach suddenly climbs several inches north of its usual position and threatens to dump everything I ate before I came in.

I know I'm incredibly lucky. I work with the most supportive team you've ever seen. Even my manager (who has assured me I'm doing fine) is awesome. I critically think well and have had several nurses tell me after report that they never would have guessed I'm a new grad but I'm human and when I make a mistake I beat myself up so bad.

I cry on the way home. Some days I feel so lucky. I can't believe i get to do this and I feel certain that I will eventually get it. But most days I walk around with a knot in my stomach knowing im only one small mistake away from hurting/killing someone and losing the ability to be the only thing Ive ever wanted to be.

So how do you deal?

[labordude, BSN, RN]

I'd be more worried if no one ever brought anything to your attention. It's nurses like that who never learn and end up being involved in larger mistakes.

So you have a few things that have been brought to your attention to work on, what are you doing about it? Do you need more training on something? Do you have to double check or make yourself a checklist? You need to advocate for yourself because no one else will. Give yourself a little bit of a break, but don't ever get complacent. Also, take a deep breath. At some point in every nurses career, they will make a mistake. It happens and every individual and organization deals with things differently. You have said you are in a supportive place. Take advantage of that and learn and grow as move further away from your student days.

[llg, PhD, RN]

It sounds to me that you have a good job that you enjoy ... supportive teammates and management ... and are doing well. You're just tired of having to work so hard and "be perfect" etc.

You need a break -- and to learn to balance the stress of work with rest & relaxation. Pamper yourself a little ... take a mini-vacation ... buy yourself a treat ... have some fun with friends ... etc. Be sensible about it and don't do anything foolish and/or outside your budget. But by all means, stop and smell the roses and enjoy life a bit. That will help you refresh yourself and keep you going for the next couple of months. In a couple of months, you will have settled in sufficiently that the stress won't be so bad. But you should always remember to take care of yourself to prevent burnout. That's what you need to focus on now.

Refresh yourself regularly with a little R & R and build that into your regular life for a long and happy career.

[SoaringOwl]

Two words: night shift! One of the best parts is limited contact with management.

(Not that I don't appreciate the feedback, it's just nice to know it's only gonna happen at 7 AM. That keeps my anxiety level down knowing I don't have to worry about her coming around the corner all night!)

Don't worry so much about all the papers you have to sign. They have to talk to you about stuff and make you sign stuff to justify their jobs to their bosses. It's more about them than you. But if it really bothers you that much, night shift baby!

[mindofmidwifery, ADN]

Two words: night shift! One of the best parts is limited contact with management.

(Not that I don't appreciate the feedback, it's just nice to know it's only gonna happen at 7 AM. That keeps my anxiety level down knowing I don't have to worry about her coming around the corner all night!)

Don't worry so much about all the papers you have to sign. They have to talk to you about stuff and make you sign stuff to justify their jobs to their bosses. It's more about them than you. But if it really bothers you that much, night shift baby!

That probably has to be one of the best perks of working nights.

[seconddegreebsn]

Haha, seconding night shift! I have two more weeks of days, and management - no joke - rolls around the corner and will QUIZ ME Jeopardy style on nursing policies, and if I can't quote them verbatim I get a long speech. OY.

[stuphRN]

Word for word how I feel right now! Thank you for sharing…feels good to not be alone!