Weirdest, funniest, grossest male teenager pt. Stories

SHGR, MSN, RN, CNS · Apr 6, 2012

Awww, man, I thought this was going to be a funny thread. So disappointed. As the proud possessor of a very, very adolescent-male-style sense of humor in which farts are hilarious, I am so, so, very disappointed that everyone's minds turn to "PERV!" Really... maybe I am just naive...but, the teen boys that were my patients at the peds hospital cracked me up so much every day. I loved it. They had to do stuff like fill in their own hospital admit paperwork. "What can we do to make your stay here better?" "Do my every bidding." I still think that's funny, yeeeeears later.

**off to find "funny" somewhere else**

BostonTerrierLover, BSN, RN · Apr 9, 2012

I can just say when I was a teenage boy, they ought to have given me my very own ER room for the summertime.

MONDAY: Wanted to go fishing, climbed a Cawtawba Tree to get Cawtawba Worms (for bait), and fell on tin, needing stitches- didn't get to go fishing:bluecry1:.

TUESDAY: ER Head of Emergency Department was reviewing charts, seen that I had not been XRayed, and called me back into ER, Stiches cut, opened back up, and irrigated. Stitched shut.

WEDNESDAY: Successful worm collecting (Had to sneak out after parents went to work), called friend, picked him up on GoKart, caught several, Friend caught large Catfish (was afraid to pull fish of hook), slung fish over to me. Out of reflex, I put my hand up to catch it, and got finned on my hand. That night by about 7, my hand had swollen into a baseball. There was a "Fishing Line" looking string coming out of where I got finned, and my mother thought I had gotten a hook in my hand, (ended up being part of the fin that comes out), and was removed by cutting a small incision beside it and MD got it out, stitched it up, and on to Thursday.

THURSDAY: Woke up to what felt like getting shot in the leg. Leg had swollen overnight (where I had got gashed on the Tin), and popped open. Went to show my father (my brother vomited, and passed out). Back to ER, Irrigated, left open for Skin Graft, and dressing care. Cried self to sleep thinking it would always look horrindous, and worried they would take my leg. (poor teaching if you ask me, but I remember being afraid to ask what they would do next.)

FRIDAY: Swelling totally gone, a clean looking wound, some debridement, Stitched shut, discharged home on antibiotics, and Tylenol #3.

FRIDAY EVENING: Noticed I felt funny after nap on Sofa, went to look in mirror, and noticed I was a funny color with funny feeling in throat and mouth. Called my mom at work, and realized I couldn't talk, Mom rushed home- short of breath by then, and whistling sound with breathing (I sounded like my Boston Terrier does now, Lol). Allergic Reaction.

SATURDAY: Intubation removed, feeling much better begging for "Real" food (turned down), and to go home, (also turned down).

SUNDAY: D/C'd Home, Really feeling guilty now about Hospital Bill (my family was not rich), and just wanting to be home. 4 miles away from Hospital, Head-on collision. My seatbelt malfunctioned, Hit the dashboard from rear seat. Lost 6 baby teeth, and broken jaw, clavicle, several rib Fx, and had some mild internal bleeding. All other family members were fine (I was the one with the ER curse), and was Air Lifted to Level I trauma. 3 more weeks in a hospital, and I knew 2 things.

1. I didn't want to go to a hospital for a LONG LONG LONG time.

2. I wanted to be a Nurse.

No Stars In My Eyes · Apr 9, 2012

BTL....WOW! And if it were me I'd never want to go fishing again, either! What a spectacular story!

BostonTerrierLover, BSN, RN · Apr 9, 2012

I should hold the "stitch" record at my local county hospital from my youth, but regardless- I was never afraid of a scar competition, that boys are sooooo fond of, and only lost one in my youth!

An_Apple_a_DayLVN · Apr 10, 2012

Here they "roll" yards. Literally get toilet paper, and roll your yard with a case or more of toilet paper. It looks like there has been a snow storm!

It is messy, and worse after a rain. They usually do it in Fall around Halloween.

Sue Damonas, BSN · Apr 12, 2012

I didn't think this changed once the teenage years were over - I have two male friends in their 20s who try to regularly outfart each other, and think it's even more awesome when women are around to witness!
Also, I had a boyfriend who just did it whenever. One time I asked him if he could at least hold it until we were out of the car, and he said, "I didn't know you could hold it!"

My brother and his friends high five one another when one of them clogs a toilet. These are middle aged men!!!

Alex Egan, LPN, EMT-B · Nov 26, 2012

I work summers at a camp. Co Ed 7-16 plus counselors 20+. We have observed that two boys in a room will quickly develop bunk funk, to the point we have to air it out after they leave. Girls in the same type of room for the same amount of time, do not leave funk. I had a boy about 13 who presented with a large blister covering half the bottom of his foot, ON BOTH FEET. They popped soaking his shoes and leaving flaps of skin the soze of an instant waffle hanging off the bottoms of his feet. He was positively hobbled. I dressed them and asked just how he managed to get such big blisters. He replied that he was playing basket ball on the asphalt barefoot. I angerly looked at his counsoler, who immediately broke down and admitted he had done it too, and had matching wounds!

BostonTerrierLover, BSN, RN · Nov 26, 2012

My mom thought my brother and I had ringworm, but it was from sticking a vacuum hose to each other, and watching the little the mound it left:)

And then,... One day she walked in and nearly passed out. I had been watching TV sucking the top of a yoohoo bottle, and letting it pull my lips in, they were swollen, gray, and blue. Guess she thought I was having a heart attack at 8 years old. Never done that again:)