Wanting to Quit - Apply to old floor again?

Nurses General Nursing

Updated:   Published

Specializes in Oncology, NICU.
Wanting to Quit - Apply to old floor again?

Super indecisive...

Thinking of going back to my old job.

So I've posted about this before.

I've been a registered nurse for two years. I started in oncology. I did nightshift for a year and then I moved to days. I prefer days even though the I know night shift vibes are chiller. But I'm a morning girl at heart and care about my health/fitness.

Not too long after starting on days, I met my boyfriend who happened to work there on dayshift. It was great and our relationship flourished while I was there. We always remained professional at work.

I kept growing in my position as an oncology RN. However I had an interest for critical care, so I started applying to adult ICU's. I was never offered a job. So then I applied for the NICU and was offered a job for a level 2 & and then a level 3 nicu. 

I was anxious to take the job because it's for nightshift and at a different hospital.. but I figured the change would be good for me. I went for the level 3 NICU. Now I'm 4 weeks in, on orientation.

I know I'm still early on, but I keep doubting myself and stressing that I made a mistake. I'm in a whole other environment where I know no one and I'm sooo afraid my relationship with my boyfriend is going to suffer and I'm going to have FOMO when we do opposite schedules. Nights suck for me mostly because of the BF.

I love my bf dearly and I don't want to risk us or lose him! 

Sometimes I sit and miss the flow of my old unit. I never hated it but I did feel stuck and like I needed some kind of change. But I do miss the floor, my friends, my adult skills, managers, etc. I knew all the doctors and felt confident at my job..

In the NICU it's been tough because I'm naturally shy and it's harder for me to make friends. I'm obviously not as confident and know nothing about babies so it's been hard and it's a lot of things to remember. I've seen a lot of interesting and cute things so far but it is all so brand new.

Sometimes at work I feel regretful and feel like I should have just stayed in oncology and maybe went for my certification or applied for a chemo infusion unit instead. 

I wonder if it would be a bad idea to apply to my old floor again or just stay here and remain patient. I need advice!

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Follow where your heart is. Bf or gf is replaceable. 

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I think it depends on whether or not you want to learn this new area of nursing or not.

Sweetpea04 said:

I know I'm still early on, but I keep doubting myself and stressing that I made a mistake. I'm in a whole other environment where I know no one and I'm sooo afraid my relationship with my boyfriend is going to suffer and I'm going to have FOMO when we do opposite schedules. Nights suck for me mostly because of the BF.

 

I love my bf dearly and I don't want to risk us or lose him! 

So I don't have good words right at the moment with this next part, not trying to sound preachy:

This is the adult world. I would worry less about FOMO if it's a situation that is going to work out over time (e.g. if you won't be working nights forever or will be able to get back on days at some point). You ARE going to miss out on some things; nearly all adults with responsibilities do to some extent. It is always a matter of trying to find balance for most all working adults. IF you envision getting to days again within a reasonable time frame then just take this current time as a learning opportunity while you wait.

With regard to the relationship, I personally do not think a great match/suitable life partner is all that replaceable, but I do think that if the relationship is solid (or is capable of becoming solid) then it would withstand a situation like working opposite shifts for awhile.

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JKL33 said:

With regard to the relationship, I personally do not think a great match/suitable life partner is all that replaceable, but I do think that if the relationship is solid (or is capable of becoming solid) then it would withstand a situation like working opposite shifts for awhile.

Indeed!

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Appears that you want it all. BF is # 1. The routine of the oncology unit and day shift.  The challenge of a new specialty. Go ahead and apply for your old position. Make SURE it's what you want.

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Specializes in School Nursing.

I'm not an expert on relationships, so good luck with that one. The thought that occurred to me is this: Your position at the old job has more than likely been filled. You will quite possibly to assigned to night shift again. Looking at it, I'm getting these questions, Will the bf be OK if you are still on different shifts, but same building? FOMO...is night shift acceptable for your wishes? 

Life will always throw curveballs. There is no guarantee that the bf will stay in your life. There is no guarantee that a day shift will open for you on your timetable. There is no guarantee that your old job will hire you back, even.

I can go on, but I think (and hope) that you will look at pros and cons here with these questions in mind, and add some more of your own. Good luck! 

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Give it time.  Learning a new unit and specialty takes a while.  Did you stay on PRN at your old unit?  If so that will help keep those skills current, plus keep a foot in the door in case this job doesn't work out. 

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You can't go back to what broke you to begin with.  Going back to the old job never ends well.  I'm more concerned about your attachment to the BF and see  your anxiety.  Nurses as a general rule, suck at picking partners for the right reasons.  You seem to want to fix everything and everyone, even when you're off the clock. Sounds like you were worried that you're not working out which is a red flag that it might not work out. If it is real, there is no anxiety. If it's going to work out, it will in its own time.  You don't have to force it you don't have to manipulate it you don't have to change who you are or what you do.  If you were trying to make the wrong man work, and you weren't leaving any space for the right man at the right time.  No man is worth it. Except the right one, and he won't ask.   I feel like your indecisiveness with your career and your anxiety over a man might be worth a deeper dig into over all anxiety and mental health.  They don't teach us healthy boundaries in nursing school. God knows we all need them.  Oncology is a really hard and stressful. I was there for six years and burned out - hard.  You will find no sustenance in a man or a job until you find your own peace.  Your identity isn't in either the man or the career.  You don't need to prove yourself to anyone. Your job will not love you back.  Your man will not make you choose. Protect your peace at all cost.  And if you don't have any, a good therapist and even meds can help you find your way.  ❤️

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