Two parents workIng shift work? Need advice.

[mamahood85]

I am a fairly new nurse ( less than one year experience). Right now I work part time at a group home for disabled adults. While I like the job I feel like there is too much independence for a new nurse. Ive been considering applying for an acute care residency at the hospital here. The residency starts in late June. I have a son who is 17 months and another baby due in mid-April. The biggest challenge with this situation is that my husband also has a job that forces him to work rotating shifts. I am not sure how child care would work in this situation. All of the other hospital nurses I know have either a spouse who works normal hours or have a lot of family support. I really want this job but I don't want it to create any hardships on my family either. Anybody else been in a similar situation or have advice?

[kmarie724]

I work full time evening shifts and my husband is in the restaurant business, so he works a combination of days and evenings and also works weekends. My parents live close by and provide our child care (my mom runs a home daycare. Her normal hours are 7am-5pm but she will keep my kids late) I honestly don't know what we would do if my parents didn't help us out. I would probably have to have a nanny or a reliable babysitter that could come to our house since I don't know of any daycares that are open until midnight. When my parents go on vacation in the summer, I usually just take the week off too since it's such a hassle to arrange child care. I guess my response wasn't all that helpful. Good luck!

[laderalis]

I work second shift and my husband works days, sometimes he gets out at 2pm and other times not until 5pm. For the overlap we have the kids go to daycare. depending on how large the area you live in is, you may be able to find someone who will do daycare at odd hours. Ours is open 24-7 and will do overnights if needed.

the advantage of infants, is they sleep most of the time anyway, so it doesn't matter terribly where they are (keeping safety in mind, obviously).

My advice is to see if you could find 2 daycare providers (in case one closes for some odd reason) and then go from there.

[carolmaccas66, BSN, RN]

I counsel peple re this situation all the time in psych. It's a big problem with families today.

One of you will have to try and perhaps work dayshift. If ur hubby can't change his schedule, you will probably have to.

Once the other baby comes along, you will have less time to decide what to do. Better to see if you can get a day position perhaps before the baby is born. Can you talk to ur current boss at all? Do u have any holiday time owing to you, where u can take time off to find a position that suits you and ur family? Can u afford 2 take a year off 2 spend time with ur children?

Also, this is what gets to me, people constantly complain on here re not having money, but we all can do without less money & material goods but nobody wants to. Nobody wants to sacrifie anything to get where they are going to.

When I was studying, and sometimes only getting one shift a weekend during a 6 week unpaid clinical, I made do with only what I needed. If I couldn't afford steak - or any type of meat - I bought other stuff on special in the evening from the supermarket, trawled the markets, made cheap but nutritious meals. I did without for many things. I went to opportunity (opp) shops & got shoes, clothes, handbags, blankets, sheets, etc - I still do. I did not go anywhere unless I had to, I walked or caught buses to save money. I actually got fitter and was probably healthier. I had no holidays at all for about 4 years when studying.

You can still save money & have good, quality family time. You can borrow DVDs & toys from the library for ur kids for example. I have always said that sitting in front of TVs or DVDs all day & night destroys families - because nobody listens or talks about their problems. People don't talk anymore to each other - we are all too busy & stressed 2 listen to other people, & that is the problem with the world 2day. I know one family who did not have the TV on for their kids for 6 months - they got rid of it, and went on walks/exercising instead & did family things together. When they said to their kids we are getting a new TV soon, the kids were disinterested and didn't care!

If u take the other job, will you have to work all the shifts they want you to? Do u not have any family at all to help you out?

If you get the new job, ask if they have a daycare program where you can drop ur kids off then pick them up after work.

I'm afraid probably one of you will have 2 stay @ home 4 a while with ur kids & economise. It won't be forever, but you can do it if you really want to. Also you could look for a non-nursing job with better hours to suit u & ur family.

Let us know what happens anyway.

[NoviceRN10]

It's not an issue until you have been offered a position :). Apply, and in the meantime figure out what you would do if you actually land an interview and get chosen.

[anotherone, BSN, RN]

If you live in or near a large city there are some 24-7 day cares and usually at least some open until midnight 7 days a week.

[BluegrassRN]

*IF* you get the position, why not advertise in the paper, on craigslist, and amongst your friends for an intermittent sitter? If you have a college or university in the area, this could be a good job for a college student.

I found a sitter (when I was in college for my first degree) by hanging up flyers in businesses I thought would attract the type of person I was looking for. I ended up meeting a stay at home mom who had a daughter my child's age who was looking to make a little money on the side. She didn't have any other sort of schedule, so she didn't care that my schedule changed each semester. She took care of my daughter in my home sometimes, and as I got to know her more, in her home.

15 years later, she and I are both nurses, and our daughters remain as close as sisters. Their teachers often think they are twins (even though they don't look anything a like).

[dishes, BSN, RN]

I would make the decision by considering my childs need for a restful sleep, I think it is healthier for a child to go to sleep and wake up in the same bed. I know my sleep would be disupted if mid way through sleeping, someone came in, picked me up, dressed me in outer clothing, seatbelted me into a car, drove me home, unbuclkled the seatbelt, carried me into the home, undressed me and put me into my bed.

[Despareux]

I would make the decision by considering my childs need for a restful sleep, I think it is healthier for a child to go to sleep and wake up in the same bed. I know my sleep would be disupted if mid way through sleeping, someone came in, picked me up, dressed me in outer clothing, seatbelted me into a car, drove me home, unbuclkled the seatbelt, carried me into the home, undressed me and put me into my bed.

I agree very much with this. When I was a single mom to my first child, I had to work two full-time jobs for a couple of years and during that time, my poor child suffered in school and at home. Unfortunately, at that time in my life, my support system was seriously lacking. So maybe you could analyze your support system and assess where there may be gaps and work on filling those in.

Once I start working, our family will be in a very similar situation. My husband works afternoons and will not be able to change his shift and I will be a new nurse and not so sure I can get a day time shift.

If you figure something out that is working for you, please share. I would love to hear about it.