Support Stickie for New nurses who are not coping

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I have read through lot of threads recently regarding new nurses who feel they are struggling and not coping with being an new RN. So I thought it would be good to start a support thread where all new nurses could post about their feelings and experiences. You are not alone, all new nurses feel this way and if they dont I would be extreemly concerned.

Specializes in IMCU.
Some of them offer to help, but not all of them. Some of them will say "You okay?" when it's obvious I am not, then continue to go about their business. There is one nurse who asked one of the other nurses to help me because he didn't have time but he saw I was struggling and really behind on everything. She did help me. I just wonder how they get done so quickly and I'm always hours behind!

I will definitely remember this feeling...I swear I'll never be like that to a new nurse.

It used to just kill me when I had the night from hell and then during report when I had absolutely no paperwork done or my I's and O's finished 3 of the nurses who had watched me swimming upstream all night would come around and say "you okay, need anything?" Literally as I was giving report. My only response was "yep, I am okay NOW, unless you want to do my paperwork." Why didn't they offer when I was drowning? I know why...... they didn't really want to help, but wanted to look like they were being responsible. Now that doesn't happen with all of them. Some are absolutely wonderful but unfortunately some nights only the less than supportive ones are around. I know one thing for sure, I want to follow the good ones example, not the jerks.

Mahage

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Wow, this scares me as a new grad. I struggled through nursing school and clinicals. I'm still trying to pass Boards, but I wonder how I'll make it as a new nurse. I hear so much frustration and emotion from each person's posting. I prayed for strength and good to come for each person in their struggle. Hang in there all.

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I posted earlier about the frustrations of being a new nurse, but I thought I'd share something that I *hope* gives you all hope!

Last night, a patient said to me, "I can tell you've been doing this for a long time."

Since I'm compulsively honest I replied, "Actually, I've been doing this for about six months."

She replied, "Really?! You're going to be a great nurse!"

:heartbeat

So, for all the crappy nights where nothing goes quite right, the nurses I'm giving report to put me through the inquisitions and where I feel totally stupid... one patient comes along and makes it all better.

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Specializes in IMCU.
I posted earlier about the frustrations of being a new nurse, but I thought I'd share something that I *hope* gives you all hope!

Last night, a patient said to me, "I can tell you've been doing this for a long time."

Since I'm compulsively honest I replied, "Actually, I've been doing this for about six months."

She replied, "Really?! You're going to be a great nurse!"

:heartbeat

So, for all the crappy nights where nothing goes quite right, the nurses I'm giving report to put me through the inquisitions and where I feel totally stupid... one patient comes along and makes it all better.

I am sure you are an excellent nurse, and I am glad you are getting some "feel goods."

Last night a COPD pt holds my hand and thanks me for finding a way to quickly raise his cpap mask and give him a drink, so that he doesn't feel smothered. You would have thought I was the best nurse in the world or had given him a million dollars. :redpinkheThat is why I am a nurse!

Mahage

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Specializes in Medical, Surgical.

well a doc got pretty upset with me because i called him in the middle of the night for an order. situation: my pt had a temp at the start of the shift 100.1. i encouraged him to do pulmonary toileting, plus the pain med he had already had tylenol in it (percocet). i mean this guy ambulated, used the incentive spirometer etc. so around 10:30 his temp was 103.8. i then called the doc on call and explained all that i have been doing for him, the med he is already on etc. he gave me an order for extra tylenol. so the next day he went to my mgr and told her that i called just to get tylenol order and that i should have tried other measures first. so what else was i suppose to try? my mgr also said i could have wrote the order for the tylenol instead of waking him up and she also stated "you will get to know the doctors and whats okay with them". i told her i refused to write an order for any med (i am only 2 months out of orientation). even though she is my mgr its still my license. i told her what if i wouldnt have called it still would have been my ass for not letting anyone know. it seems as the docs always win and we the nurses always lose in most situation. why do we always have to bow down to them. if a doc is on-call then its his job to answer the phone for a serious situation...well i thought the temp was serious enough. was it not????????

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well a doc got pretty upset with me because i called him in the middle of the night for an order. situation: my pt had a temp at the start of the shift 100.1. i encouraged him to do pulmonary toileting, plus the pain med he had already had tylenol in it (percocet). i mean this guy ambulated, used the incentive spirometer etc. so around 10:30 his temp was 103.8. i then called the doc on call and explained all that i have been doing for him, the med he is already on etc. he gave me an order for extra tylenol. so the next day he went to my mgr and told her that i called just to get tylenol order and that i should have tried other measures first. so what else was i suppose to try? my mgr also said i could have wrote the order for the tylenol instead of waking him up and she also stated "you will get to know the doctors and whats okay with them". i told her i refused to write an order for any med (i am only 2 months out of orientation). even though she is my mgr its still my license. i told her what if i wouldnt have called it still would have been my ass for not letting anyone know. it seems as the docs always win and we the nurses always lose in most situation. why do we always have to bow down to them. if a doc is on-call then its his job to answer the phone for a serious situation...well i thought the temp was serious enough. was it not????????

So how are new nurses dealing with arrogant doctors?? Because I don't have best temper when it comes to rude people and we have a lot of docs that are really arrogant. I have to agree with you, some of the older nurses do bow down to the docs. For example, I watched my preceptor run around looking for a chart for a doc while he sat in his chair. Well one day I was charting and that same doc was looking for a chart again. I kindly asked him what chart he was looking for to make sure I didn't have it. I didn't, so I continued charting. He snapped at me "so you're just going to let me look for the chart??" And I said, "Yeah... I don't have it, so what do you want me to do?" And he didn't say anything. Another doc thinks he's the best thing next to God. He's very very rude. How do you deal with them when they are so mean AND they have this preconceived notion that you know nothing because you're new??

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Specializes in IMCU.
So how are new nurses dealing with arrogant doctors?? Because I don't have best temper when it comes to rude people and we have a lot of docs that are really arrogant. I have to agree with you, some of the older nurses do bow down to the docs. For example, I watched my preceptor run around looking for a chart for a doc while he sat in his chair. Well one day I was charting and that same doc was looking for a chart again. I kindly asked him what chart he was looking for to make sure I didn't have it. I didn't, so I continued charting. He snapped at me "so you're just going to let me look for the chart??" And I said, "Yeah... I don't have it, so what do you want me to do?" And he didn't say anything. Another doc thinks he's the best thing next to God. He's very very rude. How do you deal with them when they are so mean AND they have this preconceived notion that you know nothing because you're new??

LOL! I inadvertantly did sort of the same thing the other day. A doc took my chair when I got up to get a chart while giving report. He then got up and I took the chair back without thinking. He grabbed two of my charts that i was reporting out on. I reached without thinking and took one of the charts back saying, "hey I am not through with those, I will let you have it back in just a moment." He said "you have already taken my chair, now you are taking my charts!" I said "you took my chair first, I only took it back and lets share the charts!" We both laughed. I wasn't paying attention to the fact that this was a doc. Of course they should know when we are giving report that we have worked all night and are heck of a lot more tired than they are, especially since this was a resident. It was totally without calculation or ill feelings on my part, I was just getting things done, LOL!

Mahage

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This is one of the biggest things I hate about working over night - deciding what's important enough to call the doctor for and what can wait till morning. I had my first experience with a doctor who I apparently upset because I called him shortly after midnight. My patient had a foley and was putting out bloody urine. He was having spasms and was in a lot of pain. He needed his foley irrigated, and we need a doctor's order to do that. The doctor was so condescending when I called him, talking to me like I was an idiot. He said "You called me at midnight for this??" Then proceeded to give me step by step instructions on what to do in a very condesending tone. I just bit my tongue and answered him without emotion. I don't have the greatest tolerance for people like that, but I refused to let him get me riled up. I did complain to my co-workers after I hung up. :icon_roll

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Specializes in IMCU.
This is one of the biggest things I hate about working over night - deciding what's important enough to call the doctor for and what can wait till morning. I had my first experience with a doctor who I apparently upset because I called him shortly after midnight. My patient had a foley and was putting out bloody urine. He was having spasms and was in a lot of pain. He needed his foley irrigated, and we need a doctor's order to do that. The doctor was so condescending when I called him, talking to me like I was an idiot. He said "You called me at midnight for this??" Then proceeded to give me step by step instructions on what to do in a very condesending tone. I just bit my tongue and answered him without emotion. I don't have the greatest tolerance for people like that, but I refused to let him get me riled up. I did complain to my co-workers after I hung up. :icon_roll

That is the best way to deal with them most times in my opinion. I just simply don't allow them to hurt my feelings. They don't know me, it ain't personal! I hate it for him that he got woke up, but too bad, that is his job. We are lucky that in most cases we have interns and residents on call and don't have to wake up the big docs. The residents and interns expect it. Sometimes they can even get huffy but not usually.

Mahage

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Specializes in IMCU.
Wow, this scares me as a new grad. I struggled through nursing school and clinicals. I'm still trying to pass Boards, but I wonder how I'll make it as a new nurse. I hear so much frustration and emotion from each person's posting. I prayed for strength and good to come for each person in their struggle. Hang in there all.

Just remember what this thread is for. We are venting here, and it is particularly for those of us who are having a hard time. For each of us, there are loads who aren't nearly as frustrated. Myself personally, I can tell you that the good far out weighs the bad, and I have my bad moments. The first few months were horrible in many ways, but I am too stubborn to be run off, so I hang tighter the rougher it gets. I am really glad I did because I have other options and it would have been easy to give up, but I really love what I am doing and I think that time has a lot to do with it.

Don't be scared, just come in with eyes open and be very determined.

The rewards are great!

Mahage

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Specializes in NICU stepdown (PCA).

I havent even passed my boards and Im scared. In my four years of nursing school I never got to do any skills on a patient other than straight cath's. I mean we learned how to do the skills, but none of the patients I had in any of my clinicals needed anything that I was capable of doing.

Im afraid employers will feel that because I have a BSN Ill know how to do more than I actually do. (hopefully that makes sense!)

How do you ask for help for the simple things- I mean I dont want people to think Im totally incompetent, but I dont want to hurt a patient either! Ive never even done a blood draw. I feel like I skated through all my clinicals!

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Specializes in IMCU.
I havent even passed my boards and Im scared. In my four years of nursing school I never got to do any skills on a patient other than straight cath's. I mean we learned how to do the skills, but none of the patients I had in any of my clinicals needed anything that I was capable of doing.

Im afraid employers will feel that because I have a BSN Ill know how to do more than I actually do. (hopefully that makes sense!)

How do you ask for help for the simple things- I mean I dont want people to think Im totally incompetent, but I dont want to hurt a patient either! Ive never even done a blood draw. I feel like I skated through all my clinicals!

Hey, I had only drawn blood once and that was from a class mate. I just never had the oportunity with a patient in clinicals, but never fear, when you start work you will get plenty of opportunities. I work on out unit where the techs do most of the lab draws but it is our repsonsibility to make sure it is donel. When I started out I didn't even try to stick, I then started sticking the patients who were comatose, then those who had really good veins and were good natured;. I then started doing the hard sticks if my tech couldn't get it. I have about a 50/50 success rate on the hard sticks. I have catherized 1 female and several males and I have worked over a year. I have put down several NG tubes. It is amazing how infrequently we do this sstuff. There will be someone around to help. Dont worry, you will get it.

Mahage

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