This probably is not a unique situation for many male nurses out there.
I worked my first 7 months as a nurse at a small hospital on a med-surg floor. Almost all of my female co-workers/supervisors were always very helpful and non-stereotypical in regard to gender. It never seemed to occur to any of them that I was a male; I was almost always treated with respect and as a peer--there was great camraderie. When I left this position to accept another position much closer to home (my commute was 1.5 hours one way), I left on good terms and was highly regarded (at least that is what I was told).
The experience so far with my new job has been a rude awakening to say the least. I am not going to get into the circumstances of everything that has occured nor try to fester a pity party; just rather provide one example of a phrase that has been uttered to me by someone in a leadership position (a woman) as a summation of what the culture is like where I work:
"Men are not good at multi-tasking. You will have to work extra hard to develop those skills."
There is obviously more that goes into me forming my opinion of the nursing culture--you will just have to take my word for it. I know I have strengths and weaknesses, and I am open to criticism. I need to grow as a nurse to become all that my patient's deserve, but...it has nothing to do with being a male or female. I'm not into pity parties, nor am I on the I'm a male nurse and everyone is out to discriminate against me train.
But...this feels like a work culture that is really annoying to work in. Ultimately it adds to my anxieties, is a strain on my confidence, and makes me paranoid. I can deal with it, but ultimately, I wonder if it is worth it. I'm not a suck up; won't play that game. I just show up, smile, don't complain, and do everything I can to carry my load and be a good team player. I'm as introspective as they come, and am as hard on myself as anyone. I'm really ready to work where that is appreciated.
I guess this more of a vent than anything, but common experiences, advice, and encouragement are helpful to anyone this rings true with.
Don't know about you, but I feel the need to be able to trust those around me. What I do is too important to not have someone have my back; if your pt. crashes, you've forgotten something, you need advice, or a "nursing consult"....
Don't know your specific situation, but in mine, there aren't a lot of options to "go elsewhere." So.... make your situation what you need it to be. Be yourself, do unto others, CHANGE THE CULTURE!
I have been working as a nurse since 1972 and have heard many comments from nurses at all levels. Sometimes I have disagreed and made suggestions an other times I chose to be silent. There is no reason for you to like everyone around you and no reason for every one to like you. As long as people are fairly reasonable you can always ignore them. If they get really out of line you can file a grievance or go to management or if you are inclined get outside legal advice. Me, I have never had any co employee or supervisor upset me to the point that I did any of the previous. Remember our job is patient care and as long as we are trying our best to make it happen, all the rest is superfluous. Get out of your own head and focus on patient care!
There seems to be two kinds of nurses, male nurses and nurses. I have been an LPN, since 1984, in various positions (most while in the army - 21 years, 4 months and 18 days) from med surg to outpatient settings and many things in between including that as a Supervisor.
It is true, that nursing eats their young and has historically been a female dominated profession. This is changing rapidly. I would suggest that the military (US Army) is a choice to consider, less stereotyping and greater percentage of males in the profession.
One of the things I have been known to say, especially when asked to lift or carry something, is "Don't you believe in equal opportunity? They chose to be in the nursing profession, so be nurses! I don't do their job and don't want them doing my job. My back hurts too just as theirs does.
One of the advantages of being a ("Male") nurse is that a doctor will think twice before yelling or doing some other stupid thing to a ("Male"), that they wouldn't think twice about doing or saying to a ("Female") nurse.
I have found that many patients both male and female prefer their care to come from a ("Male") nurse. They say things like ("Males") are more gentle, more caring and yes guys (here comes the part that drives ("Females") ballistic, we spend less time talking, gossiping, don't care what a coworker is wearing and whether it's "cute" or not. We ("Male Nurse") are professional, go to work, do our job, provide appropriate well documented care with good outcomes. We don't have time nor do we participate in all that "drama"'
As you may perceive, I have experienced what you speak pf and I have gotten an attitude about it, deservedly so.
That's my thoughts on the matter. (sorry if I have hurt any feelings. Been there, done that!)
As a male nurse, I can also relate to your situation. However, you must realize we do work in a evolutionary profession and we males are evolving into our own. There are many male nursing organizations that deal with discriminatory issues. Patients often mistake us males for the physician, which always raises female eyebrows. The positive side is look at the patient surveys and note how many positive comments patient say about the male nurse verse the female nurse. Males are more compassionate and less stressed then females and yes we multi-task much better. Keep smiling and evolving.
I too have been in the Army. I retired after 30 years and I have seen the power female dominated pyramid start to crumble but it is not about gender but about the servant leader mentality that goes with being a nurse. Generally, men are the leaders and the female nurse has a hard time with being a leader and making those tough decisions. I too agree that doctors treat male nurse different but only after you have set the boundaries with the doctor and proved your competence. The military had a rank structure that could work to the RNs advantage, in that the nurse could out rank the doctor; therefore, the doctor had to treat you with respect or deal with the consequences. Dale
of course these workers think that they are multitasking. but, when it comes to the brain ability to pay attention, the brain focuses on concepts sequentially and not on two things at once. in fact, the brain must disengage from one activity in order to engage in another. and it takes several tenths of a second for the brain to make this switch. as john medina, author of “brain rules” says: “to put it bluntly, research shows that we can’t multitask. we are biologically incapable of processing attention-rich inputs simultaneously.”
extensive research on multitasking shows that 97.5 percent of people cannot multitask effectively. worse, we waste time when we multitask as it takes four times longer to do two tasks effectively than it takes to do each one individually. the other 2.5 percent have been labeled “supertaskers,” and have the ability to successfully perform two attention-demanding tasks without incurring substantial costs in performance. of the 2.5 percent, the majority are women.
i worked as an rn for 21 years. don't let the stereotypers get you down! they usually spread bad information that can easily be refuted - in a professional manner, of course!
prime your gray cells ,” an article posted to psychology today’s blog, teresa aubele and susan reynolds argue that scattering attention among tasks is a bad idea, not just because it’s difficult to keep up the juggling routine but also because it saps our ability to think creatively. “the more tasks you add, the less efficient your brain is, and the less likely it is to focus on the most important task,” they write.~the washington post
think you can safely multitask, such as drive while cell-phonin'? crash statistics say you can't.
Specializes in Step-down/tele, home care, corrections.
The multi-tasking "skill" is over-rated. Yes, you do get pulled in several directions at once on a floor, but this is also how errors happen. And it is always the nurse's fault, BTW. The main problem I hear in this is what another poster alluded to, and that is institutional or personal insecurity on the part of the "someone in a leadership position." Is this leader your supervisor? If so, then I strongly suggest you bail. You can do as some of the other posters have suggested and do a good job and help others and become a leader yourself, but you could also do those same things somewhere else, too. Many nurse managers have had little training in management; many are promoted to management based upon their seniority, and their willingness to abide by the company doctrine. As with any other organization, you want to avoid working for these people, because they know their vulnerabilities and will strive to suppress any strong personality that might rival them. Just my two cents. Someone mentioned the military; the two best managers I've ever worked for were majors in the Guard; just saying . . . As someone else posted, stay away from HR.
It is absolutely worth it to stick around!! You're not there to make friends you're there because those patients need you. Have confidence in yourself and your abilities as a NURSE, period!!! You are qualified to do the job if you weren't they would not have hired you. People are always going to have something to say, good or bad!! Don't let the nonsense phase you. Keep on keeping on.......
SamyRN
35 Posts
Don't know about you, but I feel the need to be able to trust those around me. What I do is too important to not have someone have my back; if your pt. crashes, you've forgotten something, you need advice, or a "nursing consult"....
Don't know your specific situation, but in mine, there aren't a lot of options to "go elsewhere." So.... make your situation what you need it to be. Be yourself, do unto others, CHANGE THE CULTURE!
I DARE you!!!
:yelclap:
Good luck, gorjos (Gorgeous??!!!)
S