This is my first new thread post in a long time, and I know there are other threads that discuss this subject. However, I wanted to post from my personal situation and get your opinions and stories as to when a better time to start having a family would be:
A) the middle of nursing school (in May after the 1st year is completed)
B) Right after graduation
C) IF a job is obtained relatively soon after the NCLEX, then start a family a few months after starting work
Some of the nursing students and nurses I have talked to have suggested that while it would be difficult to have a baby while in nursing school, it might be even more difficult as a first year RN. Both situations would be pretty rigorous. Background: I will be attending a mostly online RN program. I will generally be attending clinicals twice per week and the rest will be online. I also intend on cutting back some hours at work to make things more manageable.
As far as my situation goes, I have a B.S. in Biological Sciences and I've been in school for a long time! To spare going into another very long story, just know that I got accepted into an ADN program last Friday!!! It will take me 2 years to complete. Financially, I will need to find a job with the Associates first, and then after working 6 months to a year I would like to pursue a BSN. We have several mostly online programs and even a night program that meets once a week that I could pursue quite easily.
Now, there are several reasons my husband and I are eager to start a family. 1) Like I said, I have been in school a really long time and I am tired of putting everything in my life on hold just for school. 2) I've already had some fertility issues and we don't want to wait too long until it is too late for us to ever have children 3) We would prefer to have children while we are still "young" so that we have the energy and stamina to keep up with the little ones and do fun things. My own mother had an oopsie baby as a 40 year old (far past the time I had left the house) and while she is more financially secure and wise she doesn't have the time or energy to do as many of the fun things I got to do growing up.
I also currently work as a full-time CNA at a community hospital. I love it!
I understand any of the options I suggested above will NOT be easy. However, having a family means so much to me and my husband that we both understand the sacrifices we must endure. I also have a very supportive husband, but he is a little worried about being pregnant while in school. But, at this point in our lives, I think it makes more sense for our particular situation to endure being pregnant and going through or finishing up RN school rather than put one or the other on hold and do them at different intervals.
Any comments, opinions, thoughts, and stories would be greatly appreciated!
Wow, thank you everything for your thoughts and comments! Please keep them coming!!!
We haven't come to a decision yet, as we still have a lot of thinking and discussing to have.
As many suggested taking time off to have family and then go to school, it isn't an option for several reasons. I need to start the ADN program this fall. So, that is a certain thing.
If I go with my hormones, I would start having a baby right now. If I go with my head, I know I need to think this through more! Here are all of the conflicting thoughts in my head right now:
- Knowing that I have fertility issues and the longer I wait, the less likely I am to ever have a baby = want to start family sooner rather than later
- My mother went through some moderately bad morning sickness with all three of her children, so that would be hard to deal with while working and going to school. If I were pregnant while in school, I could risk graduating because of morning sickness or unforseen complications. Everyone in my family has had successful pregnancies, no complications, just lots of morning sickness
-I wonder in my mind if it would be harder to have a baby while in online nursing school OR as a first year working RN. The nurses I work with have warned me that the first year as an RN can be very hard and stressful.
-Would I have more time to spend with my newborn in nursing school or as a working RN? I'm not sure.
Would I have more time to spend with my newborn in nursing school or as a working RN?
While I would love to have baby, my thinking is this: Nursing School + studying + homework/papers + clinicals + more studying VS. working three 12 hour shifts a week.
Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
You would definitely have more time for the baby after school, working as an RN. In school you come home & have lots of homework. Where as when you're working, you leave work at work.
I'm a guy, so I will not begin to think I can dispense advice to you. However, four classmates of mine gave birth during this past spring semester (our 7th semester out of 8), so I asked them what they thought about your question.
All four of them said they wished they had waited until after school to have their babies. Two of them actually failed this past semester, which they attributed directly to their pregnancies and the resulting births. The other two passed, but did not qualify for a special summer session that they both wanted to get in to. Those two attributed their passing-but-too-low-for-summer-semester HESI Exit scores on not having the time and energy to study because of their newborns. All four are married with strong support support systems in place, but still struggled.
Two are in their early 20's, one is 27, and the fourth is early 30's. The two early 20's are newlyweds (married
I know this is a tiny sample size, but hopefully it helps to have a few more opinions to consider.
Hi, I completely understand where you are coming from. I was considering a second pregnancy during school because I wanted my children to be close in age and I even thought that if I planned it well I would deliver during summer break and have time with my newborn prior to starting second year, however after discussing with family members and perusing the various threads on this site I decided against it until after school. In your case where you are experiencing fertility issues and afraid of waiting will result in a zero possibility of conceiving....you should have faith. Based on your screen name it appears you are a person of faith, therefore place your trust in Him, only He has the final say on whether you can conceive or not so do not spend your energy on the possibility of not being able to start a family.....
The ADN program is not long and before you know it 2 years have gone by..if you really wanted to get pregnant you can plan it towards your last year in spring semester when you are about to graduate....and spend some time with the newborn prior to starting work.
Thanks everyone for the thoughts! We have decided not to have and deliver the baby while in school. Rather, we are considering having the baby right after graduation. That way, I can take some time off to spend with our newborn before starting a new job and we won't have to wait very long to start trying to have children.
Has anyone else had a baby right after graduation? What was your experience?
Just remember there is no guarantee about pregnancy and delivery. I was reminded of this yesterday when I heard that someone I work with was flown out with pre-eclampsia and they ended up having to deliver the baby at 30 weeks (mom was having kidney issues). Baby is 3 pounds and doing ok so far. But will be a few weeks in the NICU 400 miles from here. This is their 2nd baby and 1st baby had no issues at all. Mom is ok too but recovering from emergency cesarean.
I'm glad you are giving a lot of thought to this. Again, wishing you the best!
God'sLittleNurse2b
11 Posts
Wow, thank you everything for your thoughts and comments! Please keep them coming!!!
We haven't come to a decision yet, as we still have a lot of thinking and discussing to have.
As many suggested taking time off to have family and then go to school, it isn't an option for several reasons. I need to start the ADN program this fall. So, that is a certain thing.
If I go with my hormones, I would start having a baby right now. If I go with my head, I know I need to think this through more! Here are all of the conflicting thoughts in my head right now:
- Knowing that I have fertility issues and the longer I wait, the less likely I am to ever have a baby = want to start family sooner rather than later
- My mother went through some moderately bad morning sickness with all three of her children, so that would be hard to deal with while working and going to school. If I were pregnant while in school, I could risk graduating because of morning sickness or unforseen complications. Everyone in my family has had successful pregnancies, no complications, just lots of morning sickness
-I wonder in my mind if it would be harder to have a baby while in online nursing school OR as a first year working RN. The nurses I work with have warned me that the first year as an RN can be very hard and stressful.
-Would I have more time to spend with my newborn in nursing school or as a working RN? I'm not sure.
What do you think?