I am a 4th semester BSN nursing student, graduate in December (yipiee!!) I have a question that I thought who better to answer this question but experienced Nurses! Today I did my clinical rotation through the ED at my clinical site this was my last clinical of the semester and I went in thinking shew finally done with this now just to pass my finals next week ! When I first started nursing school I was very cold hearted I went into the patient's room gave them their meds and went on with life (AWFUL I KNOW!!) This semester has softened my heart a tad with some of the patient's, but then some the run of the mill drug seekers I still just grin and bear it. Anyways to my question.......... Today I had an older lady in the ED with A. Fib w/ RVR that was uncontrolled she lives alone no family around, etc children live out of state husband died a while back. The RN pretty much just shoved her to the curb and completely ignored her so I took it upon myself since we didn't really have anything trauma wise going on to go in the room and sit with her my 30min planned stay turned into about 2 and a half hours I sat with her while she ate, adjusted her BP cuff so it didn't hurt her anymore, started her IV, and just sat with her while she talked and of course like all older people do listened to her advice on life. Well when transport finally came and got her she gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek and told me to come see her tomorrow if I had time and to look her up in the phone book that she would love to talk to me and that I was a very sweet girl, was going to be a great nurse, etc. (This made me feel really good as I felt like well I made a difference today!)
Would it be wrong of me to stop by the hospital tomorrow and go up and see her on my way home from school or is that overstepping my boundaries? I feel like for some reason there is this nagging in me that is saying go see this older lady you need to, but then the other part is saying no that is over stepping your boundaries. What do you all think?
Satrgazer, you have to understand that our ED yesterday was extremely slow nothing was going on. I have been down there a few time in my rotation and I am always in and out of rooms, starting IVs, floating around the trauma rooms etc. I do not want you to think that I am "one of those" students who do nothing but sit on their rear all day. This happened at the very end of my shift when all of our patient's were transferred elsewhere and there was nothing going on besides the usual gossip at the nurses station.
Thank you very much for this response as I feel like you are one of the very few who did not just jump down my throat. I agree that looking a patient up in a phone book is bad ethics. Thank you very much for your post and thoughtful well put together thoughts.
How is it that I only had 1 patient...... I did not only have 1 patient. I started out with 3 or 4 (depending on how you look at things I had 3, but was helping with a 4th) and they all got transferred upstairs to ICU and a med surg floor leaving this particular patient the only one I had for the time being. Thank you for jumping to a conclusion before even asking any additional background information how thoughtful of you.
I must say that I am extremely disappointed with a lot of the feedback I received on this post there were a couple that got the point across with out being just down right rude and I think you very much for that. Then there are the others that really seem like they are the "eat their young" type. When I first came to allnurses a few years back at the beginning of my college career everyone was much more polite and not as rude. I guess everyone is having a bad day but good grief you all. I hope you all educate nursing students and not just jump down their throat at the hospital. You were all once students too with mixed emotions on what to do right vs wrong vs over stepping. Have a good day geesh I have finals to study for. Have a good week.
You are almost correct there HikingEDRN, we float around from floor to floor mostly to gain experience in like you said IVs, caths, etc. I have had the opportunity to come down to the ED a few times, and usually I have 3-4 patients, this day in particular though we were just not very busy, nothing going on, and I did not want to sit at the nurses station and gossip. Thank you very much for your response
I agree with you it is not something I will always be able to do, and honestly that day was the only time I have been able to do such a thing and maybe that is why it affected me the way that it did who knows. Thank you very much for your comment hope you have a wonderful week.
Wrangler, I don't think you've noticed completely yet, but you may be starting to. This forum is full of old bitter nurses that have lost touch with the caring aspect of nursing. They are all worn out and full of excuses for themselves as to why they don't have time for A, B, and C. Some of them spent just far too long in a place they weren't happy. Don't lose that caring part of you. Once you do it's time to explore new areas to work, or else you'll become one of them.
If you want to be able to start your career on a happy note and do it your own way as a caring person, my advice to you is to stay off of this forum and block out anyone else with negativity that you may come across. Negativity is as contagious as these illnesses we try to shield ourselves from.
I must say that I am extremely disappointed with a lot of the feedback I received on this post there were a couple that got the point across with out being just down right rude and I think you very much for that. Then there are the others that really seem like they are the "eat their young" type. When I first came to allnurses a few years back at the beginning of my college career everyone was much more polite and not as rude. I guess everyone is having a bad day but good grief you all. I hope you all educate nursing students and not just jump down their throat at the hospital. You were all once students too with mixed emotions on what to do right vs wrong vs over stepping. Have a good day geesh I have finals to study for. Have a good week.
You provided a lot of background in your post, and perhaps your true question to the group got lost. Your original question was
"Would it be wrong of me to stop by the hospital tomorrow and go up and see her on my way home from school or is that overstepping my boundaries? I feel like for some reason there is this nagging in me that is saying go see this older lady you need to, but then the other part is saying no that is over stepping your boundaries. What do you all think?"
Some of the responses did jump down your throat, but don't take it too personally. Your right in thinking some people may just be having an off day.
As a nursing professional, you see what your patient needs and intervene. It sounds as though that is exactly what you did - you provided care :)
You were nice to her because you had the time. The details about the rest of your day weren't included in your original post, so people extrapolated from their experiences c ERs (I rarely see one that's that quiet myself), so you too can cut a little slack and learn that a more complete report is helpful, without being so eager to take offense. :)
As to your question, yes, it would be overstepping your professional (and personal) boundaries. At the time, your bounds were very clearly defined: ER encounter. You would have no professional reason to seek out her inpatient room and visit her socially. I believe someone else made reference to personal boundaries; never, ever think that because someone tells you you're sweet and s/he would love to see you again that it means anything at all. This is not heartless, this is your professional responsibility.
What if instead of a sweet little old lady she were a 25-year-old hunk that told you that you were just his type and he'd been seeking a girl like you forever? Or someone who told you that you were special because nobody else ever spent time c him/her (BEWARE: borderline crossing ahead!)? You will learn how to turn these things away gracefully with experience, but start learning by realizing you have to do that.
See, the thing is, that you should never deviate from your professional path to see any of these people tomorrow or the next day or next week. If you are in the elevator and one of them is in a wheelchair going to radiology and recognizes you, you can be polite, but not effusive.
Patients are not your friends. This is not rude or heartless or evidence of lack of passion for being a caring individual. It's the reality of the nursing profession. Boundaries are there for a reason-- they protect patients as well as staffers.
Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
I must say that I am extremely disappointed with a lot of the feedback I received on this post there were a couple that got the point across with out being just down right rude and I think you very much for that. Then there are the others that really seem like they are the "eat their young" type. When I first came to allnurses a few years back at the beginning of my college career everyone was much more polite and not as rude. I guess everyone is having a bad day but good grief you all. I hope you all educate nursing students and not just jump down their throat at the hospital. You were all once students too with mixed emotions on what to do right vs wrong vs over stepping. Have a good day geesh I have finals to study for. Have a good week.
Here is the deal....it is not eating anyone's young. In reality at the bedside you are going to encounter many many lonely people who touch your heart strings. As a student you are blessed with the luxury of spending that kind of time. When you get into nursing you can't let them all in...it will eat you alive. You will need to find that balance of caring and making the patient feel special yet maintaining that distance to help you stay healthy. This kind of emotional involvement can suck you dry.....quickly. It is emotionally draining.
In an average day when I worked at an inner city ED we would see 350-400 patients a day. MANY MANY of the have stories that touch your heart. People who are forgotten and ignored. It is so sad. I try my best to be the best and touch them all in a special way so that my time with them has eased them somewhat. But to stay involved is draining. I would keep your personal life and professional life separate. It will suck you dry if you don't. Have I peeked in on patients to see them? Yes....when I was back at work. I nver went on personal time....too many boundaries to cross. Have I attended a funeral or two? Yes...to pay my respects.
Could this nurse have spent more time? Probably.....did she have the emotional fortitude that day? Maybe not. I know if there was a particular series of events in a particular month/day/week I sometimes didn't have the emotional extra to go there each and every time....I was drained. I was competent and the patient was safe...they were cared for...but something special? maybe not that day.
Give this nurse a little slack...it's a hard hard job. It is not everyone's cup of tea.
Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
Wrangler, I don't think you've noticed completely yet, but you may be starting to. This forum is full of old bitter nurses that have lost touch with the caring aspect of nursing. They are all worn out and full of excuses for themselves as to why they don't have time for A, B, and C. Some of them spent just far too long in a place they weren't happy. Don't lose that caring part of you. Once you do it's time to explore new areas to work, or else you'll become one of them.
While there are toxic work environments I do not agree that the nurses here are all bitter and have lost touch. Allnurses is a wealth of information and experience there is a lot that one cam gain from here. It might not be packaged up in a pretty wrapper but it is valuable just the same.
Wrangler156
75 Posts
Satrgazer, you have to understand that our ED yesterday was extremely slow nothing was going on. I have been down there a few time in my rotation and I am always in and out of rooms, starting IVs, floating around the trauma rooms etc. I do not want you to think that I am "one of those" students who do nothing but sit on their rear all day. This happened at the very end of my shift when all of our patient's were transferred elsewhere and there was nothing going on besides the usual gossip at the nurses station.