A fair warning: I am by no means articulate or expressive. I hope my spiel does not induce a coma!
Well, I've been a nurse for a little over 1.5 years now.
I came into nursing extremely scared and humble. I came with fear in my heart and worry on my mind. I endured sleepless nights and crying fits in the utility closet. I was a young, quiet, shy, and naive nurse.
All that began to change at about the year mark. My confidence began to blossom. I was steadily relinquishing my fear to the past. I reflected on my mistakes and rather than allow them to undermine my self esteem as a nurse, I integrated valuable lessons into my practice.
My communication with physicians improved. I noticed that I began to suggest interventions. This in turn increased my confidence. I began to become assertive when needed for the wellbeing of my patients.
I remember, once as a new grad nurse I hung up on a physician - not because I was being rude intentionally but because I was frozen with fear and forgot what I was going to say. I couldn't imagine this occurring now. Rather, I speak with poise and confidence and openness with my colleagues.
Reflecting, I'm also astonished at how many near misses I've caught. How many deterioration I have halted. How many times I climbed the chain of command until my patient was safe from harm.
I just want to tell all new grads that matters will improve. Do not give up. Find a trustworthy mentor.
Your new grad status is NOT permanent. You will GROW. You will BLOSSOM. Before you know it you'll be a preceptor to student nurses AND registered nurses.
Please remember that you are NOT the only new nurse to cry on the way to work. You are not the only new nurse to question your intelligence or abilities.
I'm proud to conclude this post by saying that I'm currently cross training on heart transplant/VAD unit. Being able to learn to titrate drips and learn all the beautiful things about cardiac has inspired me once again. I DO feel like a new grad all over again - but I will refer to MY very own post and remind myself that this too shall pass and that I can & will.
Oh... and my awkward and nerdy love for cardiac has finally pushed me to apply for my spring classes again so I can finally become the Cardiac Nurse Practitioner that I SO want to become.
