I'll try to get to the point but this is a little complicated for me. I'm a BSN and am actually halfway through a nurse practitioner program. It became necessary to find a job a few months ago and I began working at a very large nursing home. I've worked in a nursing home before, but it was small and a lot less busy compared to this one. The place is so crowded with laundry pushing carts up and down the hall, janitors buffing the floor, housekeeping pushing their carts and you pushing yours. It's literally like trying to maneuver through an obstacle course. Anyway, being a newbie I don't have the luxury of choosing where I want to work, so I'm usually floated wherever a nurse is needed. This is where medication errors are coming in. I don't have a problem on this particular hall where I usually work, but I got a phone call from the boss and was scolded because they had found holes in the MAR I had not signed and when the carts were audited they had found some medications I had not given.
She also told me she knew I had been moved around a lot but I was going to HAVE to be very careful. She also told me there are a lot of others guilty of the same thing (which you can look through the MARS at any time and see holes everywhere) so I was not just being singled out. Still, I can't shake the feeling I'm skating on thin ice, and it really stinks because I'm trying hard. It's bad coming home, sore and exhausted after running 12 hours and in the end you still get flogged for not being good enough. I'm on the schedule tomorrow and feel like I need to go talk to the supervisor, but I don't know what to say. I want to let her know I'm willing to do what I need to so I can be what they want me to be. I did tell her I was sorry I turned out to be a disappointment and she told me I wasn't a disappointment but it sure sounds like I am. Jobs aren't easy to come by around here so I'll be up a creek if I lose this one.
Any advice?