Single parents starting NS....Stories please!!

JBGC4 · Jul 29, 2010

I'm not a single parent. I just wanted to put that the single parents that I do know and are doing this get my full admiration. They are an inspiration to me. Everytime I think I can't do this, I think of those who are doing it your way and I shape up. There is no greater parent who can put their best feet foward and take care of themselves and face the challenges for their childrens benefit. Best of Luck!!!!

CBsMommy · Jul 29, 2010

I'm a single mom to a wonderful little boy who is almost 4. It's hard but very doable! The biggest thing that has helped me is having a schedule! My son helps out with what he can, for instance, we pick his clothes out the night before and he is responsible for getting himself dressed, he is responsible for getting himself and Mommy our socks out of the basket in the morning and he is responsible for making sure all of his toys are picked up before he goes to bed at night. He puts his dishes in the sink when he is done eating and he makes sure all the laundry is in the laundry room. I do give him chore money for helping me although I think he just loves to help me and a kudos would be enough for him! He's so darn cute!

Anyway, I can't wait to get back to school in the fall, I love it so much!

Good luck to you! It can be hard at times but it does fly by! Hopefully you will love it as much as I have!

FLmomof5 · Jul 29, 2010

I was a single mom of 5 when I started pre-reqs. I did all my pre-reqs online. I am now in my last term of NS (finish in 3 weeks!!!) I am re-married, but my hubby is deployed to Afghanistan and my kids are currently...25,23,22,21,17.5 yo! My oldest was a combat medic with 2 trips in the sandbox (Iraq) and my son and stepson were stationed in HI together. (stepkids are 24, 22, 16, 13). All my kids and stepkids that enlisted are out of the AD Army, DD is still reserve though.

I worked FT through school (eve/we program). One piece of advice my brother gave me was to expect "B"s when you have that much to do! It was a challenge, but I did it! You can too!

dmcne2883 · Jul 29, 2010

I am a single mother of two (6 and 10). Thank god my school has a child care program. I take them to school with me, drop them off at the childcare center and go to class. I dont think I would have gotten as far as I have without that.

MsbossyRN · Jul 30, 2010

I am a single parent of 2. When I started my ADN program my son was only 9 months old and I was still breastfeeding. I also had a two year old daughter. Two years later it was such a joy to have my children see me get pinned as a nurse. I Now 4 year old tells everyone that her mom is a nurse like a doctor :). I wish single parents the best because it is hard to manage children, studying, and running a household.

reeta116 · Jul 30, 2010

Thanks to everyone for sharing their stories. Sometimes it is the only thing that keeps me going. Hearing other peoples success helps me to get through this rough time. I know I can do it! The break up sometimes just makes me sad especially when you have been with someone for a long time and they act as if they do not even care. It makes me really appreciate my children because they love my unconditionally! :redpinkhe

DayDreamin ER CRNP · Jul 31, 2010

I'm also a single parent. I have one 10 year old daughter. My husband and I separated about 4 years ago and all was good. I bought a little house down the same street we were living on. We are literally 1 mile apart in location but a million miles away figuratively.

We get along most of the time and he helps out a lot with our child. I'm very thankful for that.

When we first separated I was still a realtor trying to make a living. I made pretty decent money at it but it was very sporadic and I didn't get any benefits or have any retirement. I really needed to think about myself and future and how much I need a reliable income. I started in nursing school during my first try in college back in the early 90s and I regret never finishing.

3 years ago I decided to try NS again and started working on my pre-reqs. I wasn't going full time until I got accepted to NS so I was still able to keep my real estate license and I worked as an hourly employee in the realty office were I had my license doing computer work, etc.

When I got accepted and ready to start NS I had to quit the job to focus on school. It isn't easy and sticking to a budget and being frugal wasn't easy. I was really used to buying nearly anything I wanted, almost anytime I wanted. Now that I am putting a budget together and working to stay on it and clipping coupons and saving and stuff I LOVE IT!!!! I love a bargain and I love the challenge of making my money stretch!!! I mean, it is the greatest feeling to know that I CAN RELY ON MYSELF to feed my family and we do a darn good job of it. It is even fun for my dd to clip coupons with me and find the "bargains" in the Sunday paper. She loves helping me and gets the same thrill I do when we go to CVS and have $67 worth of stuff to buy and pay about $10 for it all. I love these teaching opportunities w/o really trying and we have a little bonding moment too.

ok, so that was a little rambly and has nothing to really do with NS, sorry....

Anyway, it hasn't been easy. About 4-5 months ago I started working at the hospital a few days a month and I do get grants and financial aid. I'm also very blessed that my mom has jumped in to make my house payment every month. It isn't a lot but she knows how important this is to me AND to my daughter. She also knows it is temporary and will be worth HER sacrifice in the end. Needless to say, I owe her BIG time. Yeah, I still worry about money sometimes but somehow I make it work.

I also worry about the time sacrifice. There are weeks that I only see my child 2 days out of that week and that is hard. Between clinicals and just needing time to study and her soccer schedule it is often hard to get good time together. I try very hard to go to every game and all the school events and stuff but it doesn't always happen. Rarely do I miss those things but it happens.

What that means for me is that I don't always make the grades as high as my study buddies. I'm very close but I'm really ok with not making straight As. It is kind of a joke tho that I make an 88 on everything. I'm not exaggerating either. My friends are in the 92 range and I am stuck on that 88. Yeah, I could study the same hours they do but that also means I miss out on stuff with my dd or I don't sleep. I need both of those things so I'm ok with my grades. When I do make As, it is just that much sweeter and my dd loves that we celebrate with ice cream.

When I decided to go back full time, I sat down with my dd and explained to her what it all meant and that everyone was going to have to sacrifice a little. I told her how important it was to me to have her support and what it all meant for our household. We discussed how she was going to have to help out a good bit more around the house. It is still a struggle sometimes and I do have to let some things slide just to keep the peace. There are days when neither one of us makes our bed or we eat fast food for dinner but I'd rather keep the peace and not argue. I guess what I'm saying is that you have to pick your battles wisely.

Another MUST for me is to make sure I make time for myself sometimes. I have to allow myself some down time and that sometimes means my dd stays with her dad so I can just sit here or it means I go out with friends to blow off some steam. That might sound selfish to some but I HAVE to have that or I just might go nuts!

The way I see it, NS is just a short amount of time in the grand scheme of things. Yes, it is definitely tough but I KNOW it will be worth it in the end.

good luck to all the moms and dads doing it old skool!

meredith