Okay, so I've been an RN for 2 months now. I work on a BUSY med-surg floor with 12 hr shifts on nights. Our hospital is too small for the community that has grown around it, so there are plans to expand, but for now we stay packed to the rafters.
Anyway, I'm at the stage in my career where I cry a lot when I go home. You know, because either I feel like I forgot so much or didn't do enough or whatever. Even though we have an excellent ratio (4:1 with an occasional 5th), the kinds of pts we get go anywhere from "just here for a day" all the way to "I need to be in ICU, but there aren't any open beds." For example, one night I had a 23 hr observation pt, a lap choly pt, a lap choly & Nissen pt, and a GI bleed pt. This was a pretty good night for me. On the other hand on another night, I've also had (1) a dementia amputee who kept crawling out of bed/ pulling out IV's/ pulling out catheter and the docs didn't want to do anything to stop it, (2) a major surgery with a PCA and 20,000 other meds due to past hx, a rising temp and lessening urine output, (3) a new admit coming on who speaks no English with new onset Appendicitis, (4) and a woman with a trach and tube feeds in what I will call an "awakened" coma because her eyes were open and she could scream but nothing else who had to have neuro checks Q1hr and meds Q1hr.
Now, I have an awesome preceptor. But at this point, I have told her to just wait for me to come to her because I want to do it all on my own for now and just use her for questions and back-up. Because, hey, she won't always be there, right? And my other co-workers are very supportive as well, but they have their own load just like mine. We do primary nursing, so we're all off in our own little worlds most of the time.
I'm just writing to get some of the stress out. Almost every night when I go home, I think about everything I missed or might have missed. Things I could have done or didn't get to do. Like with the "awakened" coma lady, She needed mouth care and other basic things done Q1-2hrs like how they do in ICU, but I did not have the time. It makes me sick to think about it. At any rate, I just wanted to write about it and get some therapy from putting my frustrations into words. Thanks for listening!
I feel the same way. I'm a new nurse for two months and crying as I read all these posts.
I'm miserable in my new job, absolutely misrable. I take the misery out on my family too and that makes me even more miserable. I try not to, but I'm just snappy at every body all the time.
I was trained on days, now I'm on nights. I called in sick the other day because I could not sleep during the day after my first night shift. It was awful, now I worry about being fired, which may be a blessing but then I can't get another job. I just don't know what to do. I'm very depressed right now about every thing.
Nursing school was a breeze compared to this transition from student to nurse. I don't know if I can keep this up or not. Please pray for me.
I feel the same way. I'm a new nurse for two months and crying as I read all these posts.
I'm miserable in my new job, absolutely misrable. I take the misery out on my family too and that makes me even more miserable. I try not to, but I'm just snappy at every body all the time.
I was trained on days, now I'm on nights. I called in sick the other day because I could not sleep during the day after my first night shift. It was awful, now I worry about being fired, which may be a blessing but then I can't get another job. I just don't know what to do. I'm very depressed right now about every thing.
Nursing school was a breeze compared to this transition from student to nurse. I don't know if I can keep this up or not. Please pray for me.
Brealynn,
PLEASE hang in there!!! I know how you are feeling... When I started working nights, I was the SAME way. I can only imagine how hard that adjustment must be when you are brand new! I worked on days for awhile and once I was feeling comfortable I switched to nights. Please, please. please just hang in there, I'm sure your family understands your stress level is higher due to being in a new VERY stressful profession. On your days off try to make a point of doing something special for them, cook their favorite meal or plan a family outing. This will help you all stay bonded and let them know this is a temporary attitude change. I also found talking to friends (nurses and non) as well as your SO about what is going on makes it easier for them to understand your plight. I always tell my SO "I just need you to listen, please do not try and solve my problems/hardships I am having at work." Just having him be my sounding board helps get the stress out and I feel relief from not holding it in and stewing in it...
GOOD LUCK!!! :icon_hug::icon_hug::icon_hug::icon_hug:
Hang in there. It's normal to have a roller coaster of emotions during preceptorship and that first year.
Please take care of yourself physically, emotionally and spiritually. It's o.k. at the end of the day to cry now and then, but crying a lot isn't necessarily normal for nursing. (Note, I said "a lot".)
Please remember why you became a nurse...I'm sure you didn't say "Oh I'm going to do everything for my pt" and believed it! Nursing is tough...too much to do and too often too little time to do it. So as others have said...take a deep breath, do a little Yoga and Reiki and you will be one with the Energy! PAX..
Thanks to all who have replied to my plight of emotions. I'm just so grateful that I have this message board to come to and gather experience from you all. It's one of the reasons I hang in there, because of reading so many other's posts before mine about how hard it had been for them the first 6-12 months. School never came close to the preparation needed for this career. You would probably need to go to school for four years of NOTHING BUT NURSING courses/clinicals to even be close. And those four years would not even include the prerequisites to get to the four years of nursing courses. 4 levels of nursing just isn't enough to pack in all you'd need to really jump in and not flounder about. There needs to be about 8 or so levels. But then, there'd be a heck of a lot less nurses due to the time requirement. *Sigh* You just can't win. Well, I'll hop down from the ole soapbox now.
Thank you again to those who have shared their experiences on this message board. It is truly a help and inspiration to those of us still trying to make our way toward the light.
:loveya: :heartbeat :redpinkhe :wink2: 
RedhairedNurse, BSN, RN
1,060 Posts
I feel the same way. I'm a new nurse for two months and crying as I read all these posts.
I'm miserable in my new job, absolutely misrable. I take the misery out on my family too and that makes me even more miserable. I try not to, but I'm just snappy at every body all the time.
I was trained on days, now I'm on nights. I called in sick the other day because I could not sleep during the day after my first night shift. It was awful, now I worry about being fired, which may be a blessing but then I can't get another job. I just don't know what to do. I'm very depressed right now about every thing.
Nursing school was a breeze compared to this transition from student to nurse. I don't know if I can keep this up or not. Please pray for me.