Should I talk to NM/DON about co-worker

Nurses Relations

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Hi all,

I have been working in the same hospital since I graduated. I work in a small city in a rural area. I am having difficulty with one of my co-workers. We have always been cordial to one another although from the moment I met her something told me not to trust her. She has worked in the same hospital/facility since she was a teenager. She was an aide, a LPN, then a RN. Her mother also works there as a nurse and her sister as an aide. I believe working in this facility is the only job she has ever had. She constantly gossips about aides, other nurses, and administration.

About a month ago there was an issue with a doctor's order which I observed; it was transcribed in what appeared to be an incorrect way (it was not). Although it had been clarified, she called the NM/DON on a weekend to complain about it. I am not sure if she was "telling on" me. I never heard anything about it from my supervisor.

Over the past few weeks I have had to work with her more and more. Tonight I worked on the same floor as her. I was asked by a flex nurse for assistance with a foley cath insertion. We gathered our supplies and I attempted to insert the cath using sterile technique. In the middle of the cath insertion she enters the patient's room and stands over us. I did not get urine return in the tubing so I took out the foley and she went to get a new tubing. When she returned I asked her if she would prefer to insert the cath and I would go complete a dressing change. She did not have a new cath tray so I offered to get her one (for sterile procedure). She stated, "Oh I don't even worry about that" (meaning sterility).

Here are my problems... first of all, coming into the room, standing over the patient, and interuppting the cath insertion was undignified for the patient and not using sterile technique was just unsafe. I am aware she gossips about me. I am not going to mince words, I do not like her and feel we are on very different wavelengths. I am from a big city (moved here for nursing school), i.e. an "ousider" and she is very embedded in this organization. My concern is that she would set me up or retaliate for some percieved slight. I am thinking of talking to my NM/DON about the stress this is causing me. My NM is new to the hospital, having come from a different facility a few months ago. Otherwise I am fairly well liked and a hard worker which may be one reason this girl dislikes me. I get the impression she's very territorial and vindictive. I don't want to tattle on her and I do not feel comfortable confronting her about the gossip as I think that would only make things worse. When I work with her my stress level goes through the roof. My thought is that if she were to retaliate against me, I would have already informed my NM of the situation. If I don't talk to her about it now, and something comes up, administration would wonder why I had not come forward sooner. I would love some advice.

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You have nothing to approach NM with." I do not like her and feel we are on very different wavelengths"

I can understand a pre-emptive strike... but,there's not enough to move on. Document each occurrence in your personal journal.

In the meantime... you must control your stress level when she is around. She is aware of the effect she has on you, is enjoying it and sees you as weak by your demeanor with her.

Remain cool, calm, and professional. That is the first defense against this kind of bully.

Good luck. Keep us posted.

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You have nothing to approach NM with." I do not like her and feel we are on very different wavelengths"

I can understand a pre-emptive strike... but,there's not enough to move on. Document each occurrence in your personal journal.

In the meantime... you must control your stress level when she is around. She is aware of the effect she has on you, is enjoying it and sees you as weak by your demeanor with her.

Remain cool, calm, and professional. That is the first defense against this kind of bully.

Good luck. Keep us posted.

Totally agree with this. I second keeping a personal journal. If she is the type of person you are saying she is, then I would start documenting things. If it wasn't her patient (a) why was she in there and (b) why did you offer for her to do the foley (or am I misunderstanding that part?)....

Just document dates/times/things said/done

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Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

I would wait, too. In the meantime, don't give your power away to her. Unless I'm misinterpreting your post, she's not your supervisor, but a peer. She had no business walking in the room when two nurses were already there, but asking her if she would prefer to insert the cath herself seems to actually validate her inappropriate control issues. You can be assertive without being nasty, and you can learn to appear more confident around her than you actually feel. It sounds like she wants to intimidate you.

I'd also suggest that you not ever discuss this with any of your co-workers in the meantime. I know you probably already knew this, but that type can make a whole lot of drama out of one little snippet of information. Hope it all works out for you!

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She stated, "Oh I don't even worry about that" (meaning sterility).

That is something that might be worth reporting. If nothing else, they can use it as an opportunity to reteach her about the importance of maintaining a sterile field.

The rest? I wouldn't report anything yet. As others have said, keep track of what she is doing BUT only if one of two situations applies. 1 - she's endangering a patient, 2 - it directly effects you. Everything else will most likely be thought of as nitpicking/petty by your supervisor.

In the meantime, keep your chin up and do your job to the best of your ability. That way she has NOTHING on you!

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