Should I give up?

ceebeejay · Apr 16, 2014

That is really only a question that can be answered by yourself. For myself, I find it's like my weight loss journey. I have to figure out what causes me to constantly sabotage my efforts. I'll be great for a few weeks and then I am shoving horrible stuff into my mouth and sleeping the day away. Obviously, there is something in ME that is saying that I don't deserve it, or I am scared of success. I haven't figured it out yet. You are obviously up to the task because you got through school, you managed to get interviews AND job offers. So, work with your therapist to figure out if you are self sabotaging or something else. But, in the end, only you can answer the question of walking away from it. Then, you have to answer what you will walk toward.

Trauma Columnist · Apr 16, 2014

Agree with above poster - you have to find out what works or doesn't work for you. Going to a counselor is the first step. Best wishes.

GinginRN · Apr 16, 2014

Maybe a career coach could assist regarding what direction to take next.

HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD · Apr 17, 2014

You're obviously intelligent, and know how to learn - otherwise, you would not have been successful in obtaining your BSN and RN. Recent findings in neuro-biology have provided a lot of evidence that "social skills" are hardwired as part of our overall DNA. Characteristics, such as introversion, extroversion, optimism & pessimism are part of our genetic heritage. The same goes for social skills & ability to interact with others. Some people have very high EQ (emotional intelligence) and others don't. Most of us are somewhere in the middle of the continuum.

I have a relative who is very socially 'unskilled' - absolutely clueless when it comes to picking up social clues from others; always making strange comments. Although reasonably good-looking, very intelligent (Masters in Computer Science) and a successful software developer.. remarkable unsuccessful in his personal life. His employer 'forced' him to either seek counseling or be fired as a consequence of a work situation. Well, turns out he is borderline Aspergers. AHA! After the fact, we all said "Of course! Why didn't we see that?" With professional help, he learned behavioral techniques to help with social interactions... such as actually verifying that a conversation is over before walking away (srsly). We've noticed a real difference.

My point? OP is making a very good decision - seeking counseling to uncover the cause of previous issues. Hopefully, it will involve a professional capable of conducting a valid assessment rather than blathering on about 'life skills' or 'optimization'....

jlw5 · Apr 17, 2014

To the last poster - sorry I didn't get your user name ^^^ - Thank you for your input. I believe you are absolutely right about all that you said.

Yes, the person I am seeing seems to genuinely want to get to the root of my problem. He understands that I need more than talk therapy. We already know I have a disability (called Non-verbal learning disability) which is a rare diagnosis. Unfortunately no one in the nursing world (managers and such) want to hear this. The psychologist who did my assessment even wrote that because my disability was so LESS severe than most given with this diagnosis that he thinks my outcome is FAR more favorable (testing done at age 10 - may have someone retest). I know he is right - I just need help finding out how to fix this.

I've definitely improved since I was a little girl but there is still improvement to be made. I just hope I haven't burned all my bridges, since I have gotten jobs and been fired with both of the major hospitals in town.