Sexual Harrassment?

Critical LPN · Jul 8, 2006

How about an ample of ammonia? Wouldn't that cause a loss of erection and then you could get your point across?
Seriously, I'm sorry you had to deal wth that pervert.

WhimsieRN--(Love your sign-on name) Thanks for the love as is said now days. We all gotta stick together. There will always be the stones in life that we must tread softly across, but sometimes I just let the Lord help me find the way to get the rocks out of some people's crainium. Usually I or someone else will come up with the perfect cure for the im---perfect situation that we have to deal with. Don't get me wrong, it might not be pretty, but it always seems appropriate for the particular person. :gandalf:

"Old age and treachery will overcome youth and vigor", at times. Or so it is said. LOL

I learned this early in life before the first year nurse syndrome so I guess that always helps to have a little experience of some sort. My first job was in an ECF that had several of the patients that had been pushed from the local mental institution due to overcrowding to our facility as they were so old, ill or considered relatively harmless. Talk about exposers! They would try to escape to run nude down the street of all things to go back to that mental hospital. Even if it was worse and our place brand new, it was home to them. I always remembered that. Sometimes, it is just acting out, sometimes its dementia and sometimes its the perves. That's why I learned to read my patients before I reacted. Overreaction is sometimes the worse thing you can do. Thanks;)

ShayRN · Jul 8, 2006

Besides, the issue isn't privacy, but aggression. Men who expose themselves take great delight in upsetting their victims. It's an extremely negative power play and needs to be stopped cold. Whether it takes place in a hospital room or a post office or the perpetrator's own home, it is wrong and no amount of "respecting his space" changes that.
If the behavior persists, barring mitigating circumstances such as dementia, it should be treated as the aggressive/harrassing act that it is.
Being ill in a hospital bed does not give anyone carte blanche to attack or harrass others.

:yeahthat: :yeahthat: :yeahthat: :yeahthat:

EXACTLY! This is no different IMO, than blaming the rape victim because she was wearing a miniskirt. For these men, it isn't about the sex, it is about the power they have to shock/intimidate/hurt you. It is about "Look at what I can do and you can't do a thing about it." Just because they are a patient in a hospital bed doesn't allow for unacceptable behavior. I won't tolerate it. Besides, you never know who that person really is, I have had many patients at the hospital that I use to take care of when I worked at the county jail.

soliant12 · Jul 8, 2006

It is not a male nurses responisbility to handle all of the perverts you female nurses do not want to deal with. If you are too timid to handle the job then perhaps a new line of work would be in order.

or i would find a male nurse if there is one and let him take care of that pacient . I would tell him to cut it out . I like the idea that MLOS had. That is another good idea canoehead.

Overland1, RN · Jul 8, 2006

You could do one of two things:

1.) Point at it and laugh hysterically

2.) Say something like, "we need to start an IV, and I see the perfect vein for it."

Unfortunately, neither would help the ol' Press Ganeys .

Seriously, document any such behavior and notify your Charge Nurse/Manager/Director.

As an Administration person, I have had to deal with patients like this who are completely A&O, but think they can hook up with a nurse with such antics. Usually, a "what would your wife say if she found out?" question works wonders. people like this do not even realize that we could not actually follow through with such a suggestion, but it works.

burn out · Jul 9, 2006

It is not a male nurses responisbility to handle all of the perverts you female nurses do not want to deal with. If you are too timid to handle the job then perhaps a new line of work would be in order.

Please give me a break. Why is it that it is only male perverts that do this kind of thing..therefore it really isn't an issue men have to deal with but it is created by men. I have never walked into a room and seen a woman doing this kind of thing. I do not see how leaving the profesion would help anything only some other female would be his victim. Why do you condone his behavior and resort

to blaming the victim? Surely you are not like him?

P.s. It is not in my job description to handle perverts.

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Jul 9, 2006

Please give me a break. Why is it that it is only male perverts that do this kind of thing..therefore it really isn't an issue men have to deal with but it is created by men. I have never walked into a room and seen a woman doing this kind of thing. I do not see how leaving the profesion would help anything only some other female would be his victim. Why do you condone his behavior and resort
to blaming the victim? Surely you are not like him?
P.s. It is not in my job description to handle perverts.

Where in the world was that poster condoning harrassment or blaming the victim?????????? :uhoh3:

At a NH i used to work at, several nurses (a few male ones as well) walked in on a woman doing that kind of thing. As in, she was doing it for the shock value. So there's at least 3 men in nursing that had to deal with that, nor was it a situation that was created by men.

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Jul 9, 2006

It is not a male nurses responisbility to handle all of the perverts you female nurses do not want to deal with. If you are too timid to handle the job then perhaps a new line of work would be in order.

Or perhaps some suggestions and/or training in assertiveness would be more effective.

weirdRN, RN · Jul 9, 2006

It is not a male nurses responisbility to handle all of the perverts you female nurses do not want to deal with. If you are too timid to handle the job then perhaps a new line of work would be in order

Gaaa...!!!! Did you really just say that? If you were my nurse, I would shake my things on my chest at you and watch you go cross eyed just so I could giggle at you.

If you got any less sympathetic or sensitive to how humiliating this kind of situation is, I would have to say you are one of the perverts.

NO Nurse should have to put up with this kind of situation!

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Jul 9, 2006

Gaaa...!!!! Did you really just say that? If you were my nurse, I would shake my things on my chest at you and watch you go cross eyed just so I could giggle at you.
If you got any less sympathetic or sensitive to how humiliating this kind of situation is, I would have to say you are one of the perverts.
NO Nurse should have to put up with this kind of situation!

I think what that person was saying was that getting a male nurse to help just because they are male shouldn't be the way to deal with the issue.

burn out · Jul 9, 2006

I think what that person was saying was that getting a male nurse to help just because they are male shouldn't be the way to deal with the issue.

WE CAN READ WHAT HE SAID. THE IMPLICATION IS TO KEEP THE PERVERT AND GET RID OF THE VICTIM THAT IS TOO TIMID TO CONFRONT HIM, THE TIMID PERSON IS THE ONE WITH THE PROBLEM NOT THE PERVERT. Believe me I don't count on men to take care of the problems in my life because they usually are the problems in my life.

(I think I am starting to get the hang of it)

mlnrs1 · Jul 10, 2006

Please give me a break. Why is it that it is only male perverts that do this kind of thing..therefore it really isn't an issue men have to deal with but it is created by men. I have never walked into a room and seen a woman doing this kind of thing. I do not see how leaving the profesion would help anything only some other female would be his victim. Why do you condone his behavior and resort
to blaming the victim? Surely you are not like him?
P.s. It is not in my job description to handle perverts.

---

As a psych nurse (I am male BTW), it is in my job description to handle perverts (not all of them male). I deal with sexually preoccupied female BPD patients every day. I've had them offer sex, flash me, etc. I've had them try to follow me into private places like laudry room, etc., I've had them try to grope me, rub themselves up against me, etc.

I deal with these behaviors like I deal with any other unacceptable behaviors. I had one female patient doing exactly what you are talking about. Every time she knew I was coming to her room she would be lying on the bed naked, touching herself.

The first few times it happened I sternly reminded her that her behavior was unacceptable, called a female co-worker over and let that nurse make her put her clothes back on.

Then I tried a different approach. I stood just outside the doorway (making sure I was on camera and nowhere near her), stared at her body and said: "What is it that you want me to see? I hope you are getting something out of this because I'm not." She thought this was great for about a minute and continued/intensified her activity... but then as I continued to stare (no expression, just cold obervation), she became uncomfortable and embarrassed.

She covered herself up and yelled: "Quit staring at me!!!". I said: "Then get dressed and quit doing this", and closed her door. She came out dressed, avoided me the rest of the time she was there, and did not flash anyone else for the rest of her stay.

I'd say that a female nurse should do exactly the same thing. Arrange the curtain so the patient can't be seen from the hall, stare openly at what he is trying to show you and make it clear that you are utterly un-impressed. I'd bet that 9 times out of 10 they will get embarrassed, cover it up, and never pull that crap again.

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Jul 10, 2006

WE CAN READ WHAT HE SAID. THE IMPLICATION IS TO KEEP THE PERVERT AND GET RID OF THE VICTIM THAT IS TOO TIMID TO CONFRONT HIM, THE TIMID PERSON IS THE ONE WITH THE PROBLEM NOT THE PERVERT. Believe me I don't count on men to take care of the problems in my life because they usually are the problems in my life.
(I think I am starting to get the hang of it)

I can read what was said as well, and since i had my glasses on, the caps weren't necessary.

He/she never said the pervert wasn't the problem. Someone shouldn't always depend on someone else to put a stop to it, male or female, because that's like saying that when the person doesn't have a buddy with them the next time, it's open season to continue the behavior.

And i never implied or said that anyone is depending on men to take care of their problems. :rolleyes: