Ok here is another thread we can hopefully get going for nurse veterans and young nurses to see what's to come. What are some of the craziest chief complaints or diagnosis you have seen. I don't want to limit it to chief complaint because that tends to be associated with only emergency.
I could name so many but to start the 2 that made me roll my eyes and say Seriously??
Pt came in with a complaint of "excessive anal sweating" stated that his butt crack had profuse sweating and it was impeding his life. Even after D/C came back hours later for same thing. I can not tell you how hard it was to keep a straight face during that triage.
Another patient came in OFTEN with complaints of feeling faint after excessive masturbation. :| His last D/C he was instructed to cut back on masturbation but apparently it was still an issue and he would come in for near syncope.
Specializes in Emergency Dept. Trauma. Pediatrics.
Oh god oh god yes. I had an l.p. done for a migraine with Neuro findings when one pupil was huge and the other not. Had I not had a suspected meningitis or the week before I could have avoided that. When my migraine had no relief after 12 days the anesthesiologist at the pain clinic where I was working that day insisted I get a blood patch. I'm grateful because I can't remember being so miserable.
It was one of my ER docs that insisted on a CT and when that was clean she wanted a LP. She was asking me about a headache I was having at work because it came on a few hours after I had experienced the worst pain of my life (at the time) in my head during exertion. The pain lasted like 45 seconds tops and went away. Well a few hrs later pretty wicked headache came on and apparently my pupils were unequal so she wanted me to clock out and check in. I said I would after shift and her exact words were "I swear to god if you drop dead from a ruptured aneurysm I will punch you in the face" hahaha So I agreed. Anyway the LP did me in. The ER docs had me admitted the next day and suggested to the neuro they felt I needed a blood patch but the neurologist didn't agree. So 4 days later I could not function, I could not move without vomiting. A nurse from here actually was on shift when my friend brought me in and he said I looked like death. I couldn't walk and couldn't stop vomiting and couldn't get the pain to stop. Our ER doc was like yea we are dealing with this ourselves and had me sent taken to IR for a blood patch. It was a miracle fix man. After that I had one last migraine cocktail and sleep and it was like it never happened. Pain free.
Ok, so normally I don't go out in public wearing anything identifying myself as anything medical. Well, this weekend I neglicted my grocery shopping so I had to stop and get something to eat at work tonight 'cause I wasn't feeling Graham crackers and peanut butter...again. I figured Target was safer than Wally World. I run in, not making eye contact with anyone, go straight to frozen foods. Then I make the mistake of taking too long to decide what I want. A woman comes up to me and says, "I see you're wearing scrubs, are you a nurse? I've seen so many commercials this weekend talking about nurses week!" I figured this was okay, so I said yes. Then..."Can you look at this? We just moved here and I don't have a doctor yet." And STARTS TO PULL HER PANTS DOWN IN THE FROZEN FOODS AISLE! I told her I was going to be late for work and booked my way out of there. I feel so bad for all the other people in scrubs I saw on my way out. Maybe they'll be smarter than I was and won't own up to being a nurse or anything and will say they work in a vets office, although the one I saw still wearing her badge is SOL.
A woman comes up to me and says, "I see you're wearing scrubs, are you a nurse? I've seen so many commercials this weekend talking about nurses week!" I figured this was okay, so I said yes. Then..."Can you look at this? We just moved here and I don't have a doctor yet." And STARTS TO PULL HER PANTS DOWN IN THE FROZEN FOODS AISLE!
Specializes in Emergency Dept. Trauma. Pediatrics.
Ok, so normally I don't go out in public wearing anything identifying myself as anything medical. Well, this weekend I neglicted my grocery shopping so I had to stop and get something to eat at work tonight 'cause I wasn't feeling Graham crackers and peanut butter...again. I figured Target was safer than Wally World. I run in, not making eye contact with anyone, go straight to frozen foods. Then I make the mistake of taking too long to decide what I want. A woman comes up to me and says, "I see you're wearing scrubs, are you a nurse? I've seen so many commercials this weekend talking about nurses week!" I figured this was okay, so I said yes. Then..."Can you look at this? We just moved here and I don't have a doctor yet." And STARTS TO PULL HER PANTS DOWN IN THE FROZEN FOODS AISLE! I told her I was going to be late for work and booked my way out of there. I feel so bad for all the other people in scrubs I saw on my way out. Maybe they'll be smarter than I was and won't own up to being a nurse or anything and will say they work in a vets office, although the one I saw still wearing her badge is SOL.
You should have said "oh dear god woman, this kind of behavior belongs in wal-mart"
Had a young adult call for EMS to pick them up because they choked while drinking water, with no continued ill effects afterward. During ED course, continued to ask me for water and food. Ridiculous.
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I told her I was going to be late for work and booked my way out of there. I feel so bad for all the other people in scrubs I saw on my way out. Maybe they'll be smarter than I was and won't own up to being a nurse or anything and will say they work in a vets office, although the one I saw still wearing her badge is SOL.
OlivetheRN, ADN, BSN, RN
382 Posts
We had a patient check in early this morning with a chief complaint of dryness in their mouth. Like...seriously?