Scared and Confused

ukstudent · Oct 23, 2007

There is speaking your mind and "speaking your mind." If you are bring constructive information about patient safety, that is one thing. If you are just complaining about things are done, that they are not done to nursing school standard and that you don't like how the other nurses are doing things that's another.

You haven't been a nurse long enough to know the real world of nursing yet. So, yes if you keep complaining and not being a "team player" you will keep getting fired. Learn to fight the important fights, eg patient safety (is this going to kill them type stuff). The lack of gloves for the urine collection was like you thought an excuse to get rid of someone that keeps complaining. You need to decide if being able to speak your mind any time you feel like it is worth not being a nurse. If you really want to be a nurse, getting into trouble every week during nursing school should have taught you something. Such as what did you do to get into trouble and how to stop repeating the same mistakes. Good luck in getting a new job with a new start.

ktwlpn, LPN · Oct 23, 2007

honey,you'll learn.It may take you 46 years or you may be like me-STILL LEARNING.I have always been blunt (but not unkind) I always felt very passionate about situations that I thought were not "fair" I always championed the under-dog.Then I realized that #1-there are 2 sides to every story 2# the underdog is not going to champion Me-and if they don't care enough to speak put for themselves then why should I? As far as "speaking your mind" Some opinions are best kept to one's self and out of your work environment.You have to learn to play the game. I pick my battles very carefully now-if something is going on at work that is not in the resident's best interests I will advocate without a second thought-I support my co-workers and I just today did speak up about a situation that many view as unfair and I think it probably was a mistake but I felt morally obligated to do so-I'll sleeep better tonite.And take my licks tomorrow if they come....Good Luck

deeDawntee, RN · Oct 23, 2007

I hear you so clearly you have NO idea. I have been in the exact same shoes and I have learned a hard lesson about the very issue you describe. I have realized that even if something is true and important to point out, the reality is that it is HOW I deliver the message that will make or break me/or have the message actually be heard. They say 90% of communication is non-verbal, so that is body language, inflection, volume, etc...and I learned that when I was upset or even feeling righteously indignant, my words could not be heard because of the way I presented my message...the attitude, etc was too much. People could not really respond to what I was saying (no matter how valid) because of how I presented it.

I have learned to do everything I can to not communicate to make a difference when I am emotionally involved. (Sometimes, venting is the purpose, and that is a different situation.) I am much more powerful if I can talk to someone when I have some rationality around an issue and am calm about it.

This was a very difficult lesson for me to learn. It seems like selling out...but it really isn't...it is learning to say things in a way that can be heard and can actually change things.

Hope this helps....hang in there!

;)

FreshNewNurse · Oct 23, 2007

I hear you so clearly you have NO idea. I have been in the exact same shoes and I have learned a hard lesson about the very issue you describe. I have realized that even if something is true and important to point out, the reality is that it is HOW I deliver the message that will make or break me/or have the message actually be heard. They say 90% of communication is non-verbal, so that is body language, inflection, volume, etc...and I learned that when I was upset or even feeling righteously indignant, my words could not be heard because of the way I presented my message...the attitude, etc was too much. People could not really respond to what I was saying (no matter how valid) because of how I presented it.
I have learned to do everything I can to not communicate to make a difference when I am emotionally involved. (Sometimes, venting is the purpose, and that is a different situation.) I am much more powerful if I can talk to someone when I have some rationality around an issue and am calm about it.
This was a very difficult lesson for me to learn. It seems like selling out...but it really isn't...it is learning to say things in a way that can be heard and can actually change things.
Hope this helps....hang in there!
;)

you are very right, it does seem like selling out.....that is the way I feel but you guys are also right about knowing when to say things and when not to say things. Ill tell you about one of the things I got in trouble for in school........I was on the TCU of this hospital near my house and I had been going there for a few weeks for clinicals. About 2 weeks prior to the incident I had an elderly patient I took care of. She was a wonderful person, very independent and smart. She made me laugh and I really liked her. I couldnt figure out why they still had her there because she was only in for asthma and she had great O2 sats, was doing everything for herself and looked absolutely healthy. Well I had this habit of going back and checking on my previous patients to see how they were doing and I went back to check on her like I said 2 weeks later, she was bedridden. She yelled at times but when you tried to interact with her she did not respond. It was sad seeing this very independent woman in this position. Well one of the times I was in her room sitting with her (my assigned patient was sleeping and very comfortable) I noticed they brought in a food tray with regular food on it. I thought to myself that people in this state can not eat regular food so I did some investigating. First I talked to the nurse taking care of the patient, she simply told me she hadnt had that pt in awhile and she didnt know what was going on with her. Next step was going to my instructor. I asked her what was going on and she told me to mind my own business it was none of my concern. While this might have been true, I could not morally go without finding out the truth of the situation. Next stop was the chart and the charge nurse. After a short conversation the charge nurse told me that woman had not eaten in 9 days. I was mortified, so I did the only thing that made sense to me at the time....I went to the family who were in the pt's room. All I said was they needed to talk to her dr about an alternate form of nutrition because she hadnt eaten in so long. Thats all I said. Next thing I know I have my instructor BLOWING UP at me saying things like "do you know what you have done?!" and "you have overstepped your boundaries" I was very confused at the time lol I believed that I had done something very wonderful and professional and I felt better for it. Well I know now the proper route to go is to talk to the dr, and not the family lol However, I would most definitely talk to the doctor and get some answers because I felt that the pt was not being given what she needed. That lady ended up dying about 2 weeks after this incident. Those are the type of things I got in trouble for in nursing school. I think my biggest problem is not knowing HOW to go about getting things done. I need some good lessons in professional etiquette lol

ukstudent · Oct 24, 2007

The reason your nursing instructor was so mad at you was that you broke HIPPA and then gave the family a reason to sue the doctor, hospital and nurses. Although you were trying to do your best for that patient, that patient was not yours. You had no legal right to open up and look into her chart. Insurance companies do not like patients to stay in the hospital for no reason so I am assuming that there was a reason behind the subsequent decline and death other than asthma (under control) that you were made aware off. I can see that your heart is in the right place, you know need to learn the rules in order to get things done the correct way.

FreshNewNurse · Oct 24, 2007

You are very right, I think i need to pick up a law and ethics class or something. Not many would understand how I feel though, I grew up very different than most people and have difficulty behaving in the professional setting. However I learn from my mistakes and I really need to find a facility that can help me grow by giving me the corrective criticism that I need.

pagandeva2000, LPN · Oct 24, 2007

You do have to learn to pick your battles, in school as well as at work. You are a new nurse, and one of the things that is not accepted easily is a new person that is speaking before they experience for themselves.

There are a few nurses that do check on their old patients, but, it is another thing to get deeply involved as you did. At my hospital, for example, (I work in a clinic) once we complete what we have to do for a patient, we are not to look in the chart again, except to make late entries on own own personal treatment. Nurses that have done that may be accused of breaking HIPPA because they were no longer treating the patient.

Also, with the glove thing, who saw you? It is not a wise thing to do, but many nurses have had to jump in and do things without barrier precautions. As ukstudent stated, it seemed to me that they just found any old excuse to fire you before things actually became a power keg for them.

When we do speak, we have to be as diplomatic as possible, and pick our battles carefully. Nursing can be a very catty, petty profession, and is not always as noble as the books and movies portray it to be. It's early in your career, you will have another chance to prove yourself and learn. Be more observant the next time.