The day I got my acceptance letter into nursing school was a highlight! I called every family member and friend I knew! What new soon to be real nurse doesn't? When I got my first "D" on an exam, I freaked out - and ran crying to my professor. She told me, in the nicest way possible, to put my big girl panties on. In nursing school, a course grade of a C is the new A....right?
The day I went to buy my college scrubs for clinicals was again, a highlight! I had been looking forward to wearing those royal blue scrubs - to being one step closer to my finish line. As an e-line student, I went to my first clinical solo, without the benefit of classmates or a professor to be my saving grace/mentor/guide/hand-holder. My preceptor was a frustrated and overworked nurse who didn't want me. She said, "I have five patients, you take This One and don't bother me." With a "deer in the headlights" look, I took her report info. "This One" was a 50 year old, 400+ pound patient who was involved in an auto-ped collision fracturing her pelvis, femur, and arm, and I am not sure why (been a while) - but she had a colostomy. She was in traction, in constant pain, and incontinent....and I was on my own. She was my patient for the entire semester, although along the way, I added other patients to my list.
My med-surg clinicals took me to a level four trauma center. Here I saw my first of just about everything. Here, I did my first 'scoop the poop' procedure, saw my first necrotic leg from a heroin injection that missed a vein, worked with sun-downers patients, angry patients, desperate, perverted, depressed, and bewildered patients. I saw my first surgery - a hip replacement - and knew right away I would never be an OR nurse.
Or a labor and delivery nurse after I watched a 15 year old girl deliver a 17 week gestation baby. My preceptor RN took the baby - a still born - and we made prints of his tiny hands and feet on a card. We wrapped him in a washcloth because it was the smallest "blanket" we could find. We gave him to mommy to hold. The nurse was amazing, kind, compassionate...inspiring.
As my clinicals went on, one semester after another, I experienced the birth of many children - and sadly, the death of a child. I learned how to change sheets while a patient was still in the bed, how to properly place a patient on a bedpan, how to do oral care of ventilated patients, peri care for those who have foleys, how to run and get ice for a patient and then the same patient wants something else, then something else - thus making me realize that all I had to do was ask the patient before I left the first time, "Can I get you anything else?" This simple question saved me many miles of running back and forth. I learned valuable skills like time management, assessment, interventions, and evaluation. I had preceptors that taught me how to be a great nurse, and preceptors that taught me how to be a horrible nurse. I watched every move each of my preceptors made, and I took away pearls from almost every one.
I can't tell you how many times I went to the Board of Nursing website after I graduated, just to look up my name, and see "GN" beside it. I was so excited! Then reality hit as I prepared even harder for my NCLEX. I doubted my education in an e-line program, I doubted I had actually learned anything. I took every practice exam, read every rationale I could get my hands on. I listened to the Hurst review - several times.
The day of my NCLEX exam arrived. As I sat for my exam, I answered the first 10 questions before I finally came to a question I might have actually known the answer to. And so the exam went, question after horrible question. And then there were no more questions, and I stared at my screen in disbelief. There were only 75 for me...OH NO! I checked the cable to see if it was actually still connected. I suppose it was, because the annoying survey about the testing facility came up. I have no idea what I answered - I was in tears because - like all of us - I just knew I failed.
I walked to the parking lot, numbly climbed into my car, and cried. I tried all the "tricks" to see if I passed or not. Like trying to re-register to take the NCLEX. Finally, I could not stand the suspense a moment longer and paid to get my results. Maybe I should not have done it at work in the nurses station, surrounded by my co-workers. When the results appeared stating I passed - a collective cheer went up, and again, I was in tears. And again, I called everyone I knew.
Several months into my new real nurse career, I began precepting nursing students. I found it exciting and challenging. I finally realized what it feels like to be on the other end of the scale. Through the years, I have learned some things about precepting students. Yes, teaching students as you go can cause your routine to slow down. Of course there are some things that I - an experienced nurse - can do faster than a student nurse. No - I don't want to be the cranky, frustrated nurse who will not teach students who want to learn, and who are willing to try. I want to be the nurse that motivates, inspires, molds, and creates a passion in students for nursing.
Today, I teach at my alma-mater as well as work as an RN. I am with my students as they trudge through the trenches of Med Surg 2 clinicals. Last week, I had a conversation with a nurse who was precepting one of my students. This nurse was very excited about me getting her a job at the hospital I work at, and she even gave me her phone number so I could call her with any job information. Little did she know that I began watching her interaction with my student a little closer, and I wasn't happy with what I saw. Today, I went to check on a different student who was with her, and my student was near tears. The preceptor gave her several assignments (place an NG tube, do admitting documentation and history on stroke patient, collect lab work) to do on different patients all at the same time and then yelled at her because she had not got them done as fast as the nurse wanted them done. When that nurse turned around and saw me standing there (I was watching her for several minutes in the hopes that she would redeem herself by offering to HELP my student do these tasks), color drained from her face. THEN she decided to be nice and helpful - a full 180. However, I pulled my student away from that nurse, after we completed the skills, and put her in a better situation.
With a real nurse. With a nurse who wants to see students succeed.
And I wonder, why - just WHY don't some nurses remember where they came from?
