Relationships Ruined by Nursing...

Pudnluv, ASN, RN · Oct 30, 2008

It's not nursing school that is threatening him. It's your independence, having your own ideas doing your own thing that threatens him. It doesn't matter if you are in nursing school or studying to be a welder. You are improving yourself and that is a threat to him. Better to know now, than later. As for an eligible pool of men in the hospitals? No matter where you go, you will run into the same kind of men. Some will be understanding of your career, some won't. Just because you work at the same place, doesn't make them better. No fear though. Men are like buses. When drops you off there is always another right around the corner. Finding a relationship is easy. It's keeping it that is more difficult.

PiPhi2004 · Oct 30, 2008

I had a similar situation but it was more me being the unsupportive one lol. I was fine throughout school but once I got in the real world of nursing I was a stressed out mess! My husband and I fought all the time and I really felt he didn't understand where I was coming from. We ended up doing marital counseling for a few months and it really helped me work out my feelings of being overwhelmed and stressed and we learned techniques to help us both cope. From your post he seems unwilling to really help the relationship but I do suggest some type of counseling to help you both work out your issues. I don't know how he would react to that type of help but its definately worth a try!

PS: MichiganRN, that pic is creepy! LOL

TopazLover, BSN, RN · Oct 30, 2008

I would have to suggest counseling , also. If you have a committed relationship, with or without marriage, it might save the relationship. If not, it will assist you to disengage from this relationship with less hurt.

My husband of many years describes marriage as two becoming one. We have lived this for many years. When things have gotten rough, and they have with family, finances, time, stress, etc., we remind each other that we are together in all things. I am blessed with this man who is honest to me about what is happening, even when I don't want to hear it. If we could not talk it out together, you better believe we would be at counseling.

No one can tell you what to do. Just make the best decision you can and get help to make that decision, as necessary.

biochemnurse2b · Oct 30, 2008

I honestly do not believe that my relationship will survive as my fiance is extremely unsupportive of anything and everything... ... ... is their a pool or eligible MEN (hospital staff) who understand and can relate to the hours and stresses? I just do not want to put up with ... ... ... .

It looks like your doubts are pretty strong right now. As others said doubts and troubles can deepen during a marriage but after awhile they can get smoother as well (after the first 5-10 or so turbulent years:)). What happens would depend largely on your mutual trust, connectedness, understanding, commitment, etc... And yes, who else will know better than you? It can be hard to focus on that and get an inner answer, being under stress and pressure, therefore it's probably best not to make hasty life-changing decisions until your inner waters are calmer...

...My guess about the pool of eligible men (hospital staff) would be for sure the MDs ;0) and other professionals.

My belief and experience is that once we know ourselves better, are clear on what's best for us, what we deeply want, then we somehow naturally attract it. We can also learn to create our happiness, one day at a time...

Best of luck!

RN1982 · Oct 30, 2008

PS: MichiganRN, that pic is creepy! LOL

It's Dr. Frank N. Furter.

nursemike, ASN, RN · Oct 30, 2008

I honestly do not believe that my relationship will survive as my fiance is extremely unsupportive of anything and everything--maybe I am just a little too mad here. This may be a bit of an odd question, but to all those who are in hospitals, is their a pool or eligible MEN (hospital staff) who understand and can relate to the hours and stresses? I just do not want to put up with constant and incessant complaining about nursing school and eventually the hours that I will work as a Nurse by someone who has no clue what he is talking about.

Absolutely. Do you like cats? Older men?

But seriously, I don't know that I'd recommend nursing school as the best way to meet guys, but it might not be a bad way to meet some of the best guys. Young, single male nurses seem a little scarce at my facility, but the ones there are seem like they'd be a pretty good catch. And there are guys in other roles, too.