Love_all

Thank you for replying! I think you're right a slower pace unit would be a better fit for me, the pressure that is put on me on this unit has taken a lot of my confidence away and I have worked so hard to get here. I really do appreciate your words I'm still struggling with the fact that I have to take meds but I've noticed that it has helped me, I'm eating agin and my panic attacks aren't as severe. again thank you for your advise and I will be looking for a new job with your suggestions in mind

Thank you so much! That's how I felt before I took FMLA I felt suicidal I'm a little better now and your right I think its the floor I'm working on they have a high turnover rate and no-one likes to work on pm shift which I'm on and it feels like I get everything dumped on me like yesterday I had 2 complex d/c that AM knew about and didn't do anything about it, I'm barely getting on my shift and I don't even know the pts or get chance to look them up plus after my d/cs I had to pick up a pt and an admission plus my other pts. I felt overwhelmed and my charge nurse when I asked for help brushed me off and basically told me to figure it out. We are extremely short staffed with cnas and RNs. To top it all of my floor is now a covid unit as well and I don't know how long I can hang on to this job I have good days and bad but all I do is sleep eat(at least the meds increased my appetite) and work and try to not freak out or have a panic attack. I'm physically and mentally exhausted and will ask my psychiatrist to write a note to fmla company or HR to cut my hrs to part time while I try to look for another job. Again thank you so much it really does help to know you found a better place and gives me hope!

Hi thanks for replying its my first week back I'm still having panic attacks before going to work I really hope this starts to lessen b/c its exhausting and scary and my body feels like its been run over by a truck and then I have to go to work. I have spoken to my superiors before I was okayed to be on my own and they said everything will come with time and continue to ask for help form other nurses. Which I do, my anxiety I'm starting to realize stems from not having control and time everything seems to happen at once and I try to prioritize I triple check everything I do and I feel myself starting to to panic but I am able to calm myself down at work but then I come home and I begin to doubt myself did I forget something, did I do this right, did I get the order correctly (I read back to MD but still I have these thoughts). This unit is so fast paced that I feel like I'm being rushed and afraid that I will make a mistake. I will keep going I'm telling myself if I can't control my anxiety after a month of working then I will quit this helps me feel less trapped because at this point I'm afraid my overall health is suffering just because of this job. I will be speaking with my psychiatrist to refer me for CBT. I'm definitely going to secure a job before quitting though. Again thank you everyone for replying, it really did help?

Hi everyone, Hang on, this is going to be a long one. I need advice I graduated amid covid peak in May I had my capstone at a LTC for disabled kids for 1 week before they were shut down and that week was horrible. My preceptor was mean, impatient and unapproachable and ignored me. I was having panic attacks and shaking with the thought of going in I wasn't eating and to top it off I had a full on panic attack in front of my instructor when she came to see me at the end of the week. And she told me something that I thought I had started building after yrs of being a CNA, which is tough skin. That happened and the next day clinicals were shut down d/t covid. 3 months later I got hired in the facility I worked in as a CNA on a crazy busy floor and got off orientation recently but ended up doing fmla b/c my anxiety got so bad I was having panic attacks everyday even on my days off and couldn't eat felt constant anxiety, it was awful.I wished I could just disappear and be forgotten. I had some issues with my preceptor at first she worked fast and rushed me and put me down I understood where my preceptor was coming from because our shift is very fast paced. I would come in early to look up my pts, I wrote down med pass time and tried to organize my day. Still I felt incompetent, felt like I was being rushed and didn't know my patients which only increased the anxiety. I felt like I was in a never ending cycle of anxiety after 7 wks I finally went to my pcp for help and was put on lexapro and Ativan PRN for panic attacks this happened a week prior to my full on meltdown where I thought I was going crazy and couldn't stop feeling anxious and crying. I can't really pinpoint what is the cause of my anxiety, its pretty much everything a new grad is anxious about, time running out, and everything in between. I had my meltdown and I went to a psychiatrist that same day and got my med changed to prozac. fmla is almost done and I have no idea what I'm going to do I'm scared of going back and have that anxiety and panic attacks start again but I feel like a failure if I quit this job when so many new grads are struggling to find one. With my prior past I just feel like maybe nursing is too stressful for me and I wasted so much time and money to get this degree. I went into nursing to help people and feel like I'm making a difference in the world little by little, I enjoyed learning about the science of our bodies. I'm introverted and have a bit of social anxiety but I hate that I have to take meds for anxiety b/c of this job, granted I've been an anxious person but never to this extent. I've read and been told that it gets better and that there's light at the end of the tunnel but it feels so impossible and far. Has anyone had this much anxiety? Any advice or tips would be greatly appreciated