Nursetk4

Thank you for you input. And your opinion is important and welcomed. This maybe a nurse site but working in healthcare we are all members of the same team and each persons opinion is needed. I know that as a nurse I could not do my job by myself. As I mentioned before I think we all use the word "my". And I think in many instances it is a term of endearment. I know I use it all the time. Thank you for sharing your insight.

I know this is hard. But remember this too shall pass. When you get in these high stress situations, take a few deep breaths. Studies show that deep breathing calms you down. I know it seems simple but it works. You are being too hard on yourself. You need to show yourself kindness. Remember how you feel now and I can guarantee in 2 weeks you will feel better. Surround yourself with supportive family and friends. And make sure you are getting enough rest. You got this girl. If you can survive nursing school, pass boards and handle a preceptor from hell. There isn't anything you can't master. Have Faith and Believe.

I take it as a compliment that I am being referred as their NP

I take it as a compliment when I am referred as their NP.

Best advice.

The above comment is for nurseonamotorcycle.

You made me laugh. I reread my post and thought it said the same thing.

I suggest writing down all the issues you have had with your preceptor. Then put in order the top issues. Have time to process it and when you are in a calm place, make an appointment with the nurse manager to discuss your concerns. I would meet her without your preceptor. Bring in your thoughts in bulleted format and discuss each concern. Have a notebook to write down your managers suggestions. I would not tell anyone that you are meeting with admin. You don't know who you can really trust. This situation is going from bad to worse and I am worried that this is going to escalate to where you will get into it with your preceptor. It sounds like she is trying to get you to lose it so that you could lose your job. One can only take so much. This is not healthy for you. I am truly sorry this is happening to you. Enough is enough. You need to go to admin. NOW. Do you belong to a union at your hospital?If so, they can assist you. Know you are not alone. Please keep us updated.

Your experience reminds me of my first job as a RN. I had a preceptor that was very similar to yours. She even called me stupid in front a patient. It was constant put downs. She was best friends with the nurse manager and admin. So I had no where to go. I was a new grad and had been an intern on the floor and had worked really hard to get this job. I was not going to allow her to chase me off. It was one of my hardest experiences a nurse. I have been a nurse for over 17 years and look back on those times as my foundation. I promised myself I would never treat another nurse like that and I can say I never have. When I am precepting I remind myself when I start to get frustrated with my student I remember how I felt and find kinder words to say. You will be a preceptor someday. Never forget how it felt to be treated the way you have. I am not saying that any of this is ok. But I am a true believer that you can learn from not only good experiences but the really ugly ones too. I am thankful for the experience because I truly believe that it has made me a better nurse and teacher. It is obvious that you are smart to be working ICU as a new grad. Give yourself credit for working on a had unit. A suggestion is on your time off take an area that you need to learn more about and look it up and write notes down. I had a small notebook I kept in my pocket with me at all times that had formulas, med info. Etc for when I got nervous. I also wrote little phrases in the notebook that would make me laugh or remind myself I am smart. One of my favorites is "this is a fabulous experience and I am getting smarter by the minute". You will make it through this. And all that matters is that you are giving the best care for your patient. You are not there to make friends but to do a job. You have worked hard for that license. One last thing is to make sure you have a good support system and outside activities to balance. Exercise is always good. Nursing is constant learning. You will never know it all or remember it all. A good nurse is constantly looking things up and educating themselves. That is why working in medicine is such a cool job. Everyday is a new learning experience. You got this. Please keep us updated on your journey. And always know you are never alone. Thank you for being honest.

I know you are frustrated but don't give up. All this hard work will be worth it. I promise. These experiences will help you when you are dealing with difficult patients or situations where you are humbled. It is teaching and showing you are resilient and that you don't give up. Attributes that make a great nurse. A couple of suggestions. Don't study when you are stressed. I know easier said then done. Studies show that when you study during stress that is what your brain remembers. I would wake up around 2 am and study until 4 am. Then go back to sleep for a couple of hours. This helped me because I had slept and the environment was quiet. I would also play music in the background so when I was taking a test and I started to panick I would stop and start singing the song in my head and it would calm me down. Pink got me through NP boards. I passed on my first try. Another suggestion is to read the last sentence of the question and then read the answers. Usually you can omit 2 answers. Look for words such as Only, No, always, but etc. These words change the question and can be confusing I am too the mom of 4. So I know how hard this is for you. I also read books on study skills. I hope this helps. Please keep us posted Best Wishes

You my friend are AMAZING.

On my first day of starting the RN program, my class was asked how many of us were working. More than half the class raised their hands. Our instructor told us we would have to quit. Well I did not have a bill fairy. I worked 2 jobs. One full time, one part time and went to school full time and clinicals. It was hard but totally worth it. I recently completed my PNP while working 2 jobs, going to school full time with 4 kids. It was extremely difficult. Just remember short term pain for the long term gain. You can do anything you set your mind to.

Perfectly stated. I could not agree with you more. Being a Nurse is a stressful job. That is why it is so important to have coping measures and family/friend support. In addition, when the stress becomes too much to get help and not be afraid. This attitude that we have it all together is a misconception. I have been a nurse for a long time and still have many days of stressful moments but many days of absolutely loving my job. There is no other job I want to do.

Thank you for your kind words of encouragement. It is greatly appreciated.

So today has been a fabulous day of feeling quite stupid. This transition period is definitely more than I bargained for. I guess it's when you finally think you have something figured out you are sent in a tail spin. I pretty much just need to put my big girl panties on and realize there will be days like this

To Ambr46 post 21 You are absolutely right.

I think nursing school curriculum needs to do a better job in addressing the transition period from student to new grad. Coping skills need to be taught. Learning how to care for ourselves is vital. Some employers are better at taking care of their staff than others. However, many areas of nursing are short staffed, have high acuity patients, long shifts and so much more that add to the stress level. Telling one not to be anxious or stressed is a slap to the face. Crying is a release mechanism. Usually the tears happen at the most inappropriate times. All this being said. Nursing can be one of the most rewarding jobs but also one of the toughest.

Thank you for your post. You said exactly how I feel. I graduated over a year ago and have been practicing for almost 8 months. I love the provider role. I have worked really hard and sacrificed even more to be here. It was not easy to get into FNP program I attended and I had some of the toughest but best instructors. I also spent 1000s of hours studying. The NP role isn't for everyone. I agree that non quality programs need to be shut down. Lastly, how about being called health care providers or better yet Nurse Practitioner.

I try to treat everyone I come in contact with as an important member of the team. I could not treat my patients without the help of CNAs, fellow nurses, unit secretaries and housekeeping. Our patients deserve the best care.

It's obvious you are missing the point of what was said. It's a combination of critical thinking, being competent and showing compassion. Nothing was said about being superior for being compassionate. The post was referring to taking the NCLEX exam and that people were sharing their experiences of not passing.

This is a response to post number 17. I think this is a great plan. I was a nurse for 12 years before I went back to school for my NP/MSN. I feel my years as a nurse has really helped me in my new role. Being a NP is a great job. However, grad school, clinicals and transitioning into the role is a lot of work. But totally worth it.

This is the attitude of nurses eating their own. This thread is not only talking about competency but of understanding that one is human, not perfect. I agree that nursing is a combination of critical thinking, being competent but most important being compassionate. If you can't show kindness to your fellow nurses, how do you show this to your patient? How many of you have held a dying patient's hand or comforted their family member? I don't think they were wondering what your score was on your NCLEX. Let's stop being so judgement and stop hiding behind being superior because one passed their NCLEX on your first try. Let's for once show support for someone who was brave enough to be vulnerable.

Thank you for this post. You hit the nail on the head. We need to support each other. There is so much negativity in our profession. I appreciate those who are brave enough to show the issues that affect them. These are the attributes of being a nurse. The OP did not give up. That's what is important.

Thank you for not giving up. I know it was not easy to share your story. There are many components of being a great nurse. Test taking is only a very small part. Being humble and compassionate are far more important than how many times it takes to pass a test. Enjoy your achievement. Best of luck to you.

I have meet several nurses who were extremely book smart, passed tests with ease but could not have a conversation with a patient. Nursing is a combination of critical thinking, tenacity,passion and caring for others in a way only a nurse can do. It is important to support our fellow nurses. I think that if one fails the NCLEX, CEUs in their weak area should be completed before another attempt is made to take the test.