The last time I was on this forum was mid 2012. I apologize for the length of this thread, however, I was just looking for a little support. This was my last post in July 2012:
Hello everyone, I have posted before about my issues so I won't go into more detail. I currently and recently have a suspended RN license for 2 years for diversion of narcotics after falling into postpartum depression. Since then, I have had a very difficult time pulling myself together because of the shame and guilt I am experiencing. Currently, I am staying at home with my 7 month old daughter and doing all of the necessary compliance recommendations of the Board of Nursing. I was hoping to say that things have gotten easier since this past February but they have not been. I have been having a very, very difficult time forgiving myself and have a great deal of self hatred that I am dealing with. I feel like a failure. I sincerely care deeply about my profession and about my patients and am having a terrible time being away from nursing. However, I have been entirely sober and do not have ANY desire to use whatsoever. Sorry, I'm getting off topic. Anyway, I have always wanted to get my Masters degree in the healthcare field. Obviously, it would be my choice for it to be in Nursing but since I don't qualify for a MSN due to my current suspended license, I was wondering what you all thought about a Masters in Healthcare Administration. I would love to be a Nursing Director or a Nurse Manager etc.. someday but I feel extremely discouraged about the recent suspension. I hate to not get a Masters in Nursing specifically but.... would I be able to be a Nurse Manager/Administrator someday when my license is reinstated?? Would this Masters degree be helpful to the Bachelors degree that I already have? I was wondering if it would be an asset to my Bachelors or just not even worth it. Do any of you know the significant differences between a Masters Degree in Nursing: Nursing Administration and a Masters of Healthcare Administration? Can I get similar jobs? This is of course AFTER my license is reinstated. I figured that since I am home with my daughter anyway, I could look into an online Masters program. I hate to get excited about this because I don't want to be let down but this could most definitely help me get through these next few years. Please let me know what you all think. I greatly appreciate your comments. So sorry this was so long
Fast forward two years:
Clean and sober of all mood altering chemicals/alcohol since my initial date of sobriety (almost three years sober and feeling great)
Attend at least two or three meetings a week among many other meetings/apts.
Compliant with all of the nursing board's demands and requests
Started and completed my Masters Degree in Health Care Administration
Recently reapplied for my nursing license in September and am anxiously awaiting the next step
Chasing around a very busy "almost" three year old
I am not writing this to brag, whatsoever. I am writing because I am ready for the next step in this long process and I have been praying and praying (and PRAYING) that everything works out the way it's meant to work out. Although my husband and I have been getting by, the financial strain of my mistakes and faults have taken a tremendous toll over the past few years. I feel like I have been attempting to be very strong, but there are times when I need encouragement and prayers and am too afraid to ask. Now is one of those times. I am taking the risk of asking for that here because I know others have been in the same shoes. I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to read this. It means a lot to me.