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bigeyes4's Latest Activity

  1. Hi everyone. A third time, I am attempting nursing school.- from the beginning. I am a sensitive person "in recovery". I don't mean that I took drugs or drank, but that my sensitivity has caused melt-downs on two attempts at nursing I. I am wiser now and am healing this sensitivity everyday with affirmations, biofeedback, neurofeedback and therapy. I thought I would strengthen myself and be ready to begin in the fall of 2014. I am applying to a program that requires chemistry as a prerequisite. So I figured that would buy me time to get functional. I have a 3.8 GPA and learn quickly. I just have to polish my stress management skillls. Some days it seems that I am doing the right thing and other days I panic and worry that perhaps this isn't the right thing. - returning. What if I have another failed attempt? I will be even more depressed. I don't know if I can tolerate it. Yet other days I am confident that I can swing it in all ways. My feelings about this big decision keep wavering. I am married with three children 23, 20 and 17. My age is 57. I am healthy, strong, energetic and fit. I wonder what anyone's take on this situation would be . Thanks so much.
  2. Thank you so much, hurley and non for the inspiring and encouraging words! I will go cautiosly and find the right spot for myself. I wll know in May if my request to re-enter will be granted. Since I have just about been through the whole first semester twice, I also requested to challenge nursing 1 with their exam. We shall see what they say. Thanks again.
  3. I've been working with a clinical psychologist regarding the meltdowns and they are due to my inherent hypersensitivity. I may be able to improve that, but I don't think I will ever totally get rid of it. I just have this hunch that everything is going to work out this time, though. I know that there is no logical basis for me to think this way which worries me. I am afraid that I am deluding myselt. not good..
  4. I just know I can do it. I wrote a letter to the department head today requesting to be reinstated and to be given the opportunity to challenge nursing 1 with their exam. It is going before a committee in May and I'll find out then. I know I can do it. My husband says that I shouldn't try and that I'm just not cut out for nursing. I know I can do it. Maybe I have grandiose thinking? I had two meltdowns due to stress. But I am wiser now. I know I can do it.
  5. I think that is what I am going to end up doing. Are you a musician? I play violin and piano. I was just noticing your logo there. Thanks for the suggestions!
  6. bigeyes4

    29 too old to start nursing school?

    Well, I am 57 and may start in the fall. I tried twice before. Am I foolish to think that I can do this? or should do this? My children are older and I am married. What do you think?
  7. Actually, I did want to work for an insurance company. I was thinking of legal nurse consultant too since I used to be a paralegal. I want to be a nurse to make a positive impact on people and to learn the material in which I am extremely interested. -
  8. Hi all - I have a low threshold for stress. I have had melt-downs during each attempt at nursing school. I have taken the first semester twice - almost to the end. I'd say that each time I dropped it I allowed the clinical instructor to stress me out. I feel stronger now. I exercise, I eat right, I sleep well and think that I have a good attitude. I know what to expect and I know how to handle difficult situations. To attempt nursing school for the third time, I have to write a letter to the head of the department. I haven't sent it yet. Any suggestions. I had no problem academically. Thank you in advance.
  9. bigeyes4

    Ccri Spring 2013 admission

    Anyone who plans to attend the nursing program at CCRI is masochistic. The clinical instructors are nothing but abusive. I never once heard the plural of diagnosis pronounced correctly. They kept saying "diagnosises". These teachers are illiterate. I heard one instructor ask how to spell postpartum. Unbelievable. It's an inferior training with instructors who threaten and abuse the students. The biggest mistake I ever made was to matriculate in the CCRI nursing program. It's nothing to get excited about. Anyone who attends is in for a very rough ride. It's nothing but torture. I remain angry, bitter, resentful and remorseful for having wasted a few years of my life. beware.
  10. I encountered the same situations at my former nursing program. Most of the time, the instructors can't pronounce terms of medications. I haven't heard one of them pluralize the word diagnosis correctly. (diagnoses - They keep saying diagnosises). Ubelievable, and these people have Master's degrees. They really do set us up to fail. There is no altruism. It strictly "dog-eat-dog". I have caught instructors giving us incorrect information too. As you say, I pay them to teach me, not for me to be the teacher. So now I can see that these phenomena are not specific to my nursing program but may be universal. My decision has now been made. I will not venture into another nursing program hoping that things will be different because they may not be. I felt my physical and mental well-being going, so I had to quit. I don't think finances or any other self-imposed restraints should keep one from leaving an unhealthy situation. The indivdiual is worth more than that. By the age that I am (over 40) I have finally learned that. I leave the field with nothing but acrimony.
  11. Thank you for your nice response. I am feeling better by now. I have been brainstorming for alternate avenues. I know that I have strenghts and it only makes sense to capitalize on them. So, once again, I seek my niche. But it's ok. I have a lot of good things happening in my life despite this nursing thing failure. I do see a therapist and the advisors at the school have been very available to me. I have been trying to handle the situation intelligently and I think I"m heading that way. Best of luck in your nursing adventure! I hope you are young and single because it's a lot easier to negotiate then!
  12. I sure wish I had been in a program like that. Our program was definitely brutal. I would have preferred a BSN program, but I didn't do the right research. I have a bachelor's in a non-nursing area and could have done well, had I found the right program. Our instructors bully their students. I found that difficult to tolerate. I am bitter and wish I had gone somewhere else. I am tired of school. I have tried many things. That's it. In addition, I found the hands-on aspect difficult. I am not a particularly dexterous person (even though I play three musical instruments). I can't figure out why. I was reprimanded for not learning how to put on and take off sterile gloves. It took me a while to learn how to put an ace bandage around a stump (amputated leg - phony - in nursing lab). I passed the med calculations test and my academic performance was quite good. If that were all that it took to be a nurse, I'd be doing fine. One day, I had had enough and could feel myself slipping emotionally. In the interest of self-preservation I just had to leave. I think that my situation is probably unique. Most students drop out because of academic deficiencies. That area was my strength. When I started nursing school, I considered it a journey that would probably change me for the better. I looked forward to that. But now I don't have that. I have this need to experience something life-changing (in a good way) like joining the army but I'm over the age limit for that. I am married with three children - two grown and the third in 11th grade. I was happy to have something potentially to fill the nest when it emptied. But again, I don't have that anymore. I feel a void. My motivation to find a job is nill. Thank God my husband's income suffices for the family. There is very little I'm interested in right now. I have decided to file for disability because it seems that I can't hold down a job (I have been fired many times) and I can't complete a post-graduate program. I feel like an emotional cripple. I am sensitive and have had problems with depression and anxiety with many hospitalizations. I even self-injured during a period of a few years. I don't do that anymore. Sorry for the candor, but I can be candid when no one knows my name. Verbalizing my situation seems to put it in perspective perhaps. Any comments are welcomed. Thanks.
  13. bigeyes4

    Rahhh! Nursing school is taking its toll

    I quit nursing school. I couldn't stand my instructor's constant bullying. I am depressed about it. I think about death a lot, but I have no plan.
  14. bigeyes4

    NEU Direct Entry Online?

    HI - I just quit an associate's degree program because the instructor was too sarcastic for my tastes. Is this typical behavior for clinical nursing instructors or are there some institutions that actually have teachers who encourage their students? I got into Northeastern's direct entry MSN last year. Should I reapply? Thanks for your input.
  15. bigeyes4

    Assuming The Nurse Role

    I am neither thriving nor survivng in nursing. Hence my exit from the program. I know that I''m obsessing on this unfortunate event, but I just can't get my mind off it. I have a lot going for me without being a nurse, but it really is disheartening. So much led up to this point with the prerequisites, the research, the visualization of what it was going to be like, etc. and now it's one big let-down. I have had a lot of let-downs in my working life - and this is yet another which serves to worsen my morale about life. Today I passed a bridge that didn't have railings on it. - so easy to jump, but I don't think I'd ever have the nerve. The temptation was there, however.
  16. bigeyes4

    Starting Clinicals and Having Anxiety

    Hi all -- We just finished our nursing home rotation. I am a first semester older nursing student. During a free moment, we are allowed to practice blood pressures on eachother. At home mine is usually 118/60 but at the clinical site it is closer to 150/90. Is this of concern?

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