Thank you all so much for your advice! This is a hard decision, but as the week as worn on, I have become more at peace with the idea of moving on. I am 26, single and not dating, don't have children...I am definintely in a different situation than many. I don't have anyone to do this for but me. I can't even describe how much I hate my life right now and what a roller coaster I am on. I went to classes yesterday, took my Med/Surg exam and felt like I knew nothing. Waiting on the grad, but I think my mind is made up. My family has been so supportive of me through all of this. They are not judging me for leaving; they really just want to see me happy. I am thinking of just dropping my Med/Surg 7 credit class and keeping the 8 credits of 3 easier classes. This gives me some time to think, be less stressed, and still haev my spot at school incase I change my mind. I don't see myself changing my mind, but at least it's there.
Sueall, thank you for your story! It sounds like you felt exactlty the way I do. I don't feel like I'm making the wrong decision for me, but I also worry about what to do next. What are you doing now? You don't regret dropping out? I am feeling so much better thinking about not doing this anymore. I don't care anymore about learning or the patients and that is such a red flag saying this just isn't for me. I always really wanted to be a vet tech, but the pay is so low, I talked myself out of it and decided to do humans instead. It is NOT the same thing for me. I don't have the deepseated love for people, I have for animals. I just felt like I could do nursing even if I didn't love it and have it finance my love for animals. But what good am I to anyone if I am miserable in my work?
My friend sent me this quote the other day and it all clicked:
The most dangerous risk of all - the risk of spending your life not doing what you want on the bet you can buy yourself the freedom to do it later.