DolceVita

I 100 percent agree but I also think you should escalate this to your senior. You can tell them you want to be coached to handle this with the individual. It doesn't have to be a formal process. This does 2 things: gets it in front of your senior and it shows that you are a mature and responsible professional. I had a great boss a while back. I went to her to complain about someone and she was happy to listen and coach me through dealing with it directly. I was horrified because the woman was deeply unpleasant and spoke to me like I was something she scraped off her shoe. However, every time we worked together and she was rude/dismissive/hostile I had a script that was manager approved. Best thing I ever did. It took about 6 weeks and I hated it in the moment but ultimately she stopped the behaviors. I grew professionally from the experience too. It was also the hardest thing I've ever done professionally. Failing that you can ask your senior for mediation with that individual.

Unfortunately, this happens more often than it should. Sometimes an offer is "anticipated" but still needs HR approval, budget sign-off, or reference clearance before it can be finalized. If something changes internally (another candidate, hiring freeze, internal transfer, etc.), communication can fall apart. You did the right thing by following up twice. At this point, I'd move on and keep applying elsewhere. If they circle back, great — but don't pause your search waiting. It's frustrating, but it's usually disorganization rather than something personal.

I'd like to think managers could hire PRN related to individuals on FMLA but I can see why some don't. Continuous FMLA is relatively easy to cover but intermittent can be unpredictable. I've had intermittent FMLA for a family member and it wasn't predictable at all and no PRN position could have covered it because there would might be less than 12 hours notice of absence. I hated using it because I knew it impacted my team but at the time that was the only option open to me. However when I had a big surgery and had to be off for 12 weeks (using FMLA) they could plan staffing in advance. I think what gave me perspective and lessened my guilt was, that for years I had worked when others had/used FMLA. It did impact us as a team but I think supporting people quietly is part of being a team. I've never had any tolerance for colleagues that have speculated about other people's sick leave or FMLA. I leave that kind of issue up to managers and HR. Believe me they monitor that stuff.

This should be on our break room wall.

You will have to review the state application for licensure to see if there is a stipulation regarding status or ability to work. Be extremely careful, it isn't always worded as clearly as you'd hope. Most important, do not lie. Your biggest issue will be that you can't work once you get your license. You won't qualify for any special programs for foreign nurses due to your overstay. If you leave the USA you'll be unable to re-enter for 3-10 years. I had an immigration issue and had this same problem when I graduated. 10/10 don't recommend.

We all know that colleagues calling off, FMLA or not, affects us at work. Colleagues going on vacation affects us too. I get that you have resentment about this individual. It is important to recognize that FMLA requires verification by a provider and the provider dictates the amount of time/number of instances per month. FMLA is not unlimited. I suggest that if you feel that strongly about it ask to speak privately with your manager. I'll repeat my advice to not discuss this with your colleagues even if you are mad about it (or they are mad about it). Over time you'll find that gossip will impact your work life far more than an individual on FMLA.

I use a note template that I made myself and I just fill in. If you looked over a year's worth of shift summaries you'd probably think the same about mine. If there was an inaccuracy in the recent note you should discuss with the individual. Otherwise why are you playing detective? As I frequently say - make sure to keep your opinion to yourself and not "checking in" with others to see if they've noticed the same thing. That's just toxic gossip wrapped up as concern.

I would leave it alone. Also, I would not discuss your opinion/thoughts about it with even your most trusted colleagues. I worked with someone who had FMLA for a family member and there were 2-3 people would always speculate about the veracity of her FMLA and they'd be resentful that the person was "free" to call off. Even if that person had been misusing FMLA I thought the cruddy behavior of our colleagues towards her (behind her back) was far worse. They basically smeared this woman's name to anyone who would listen. Totally toxic. Leave it be and hope you never need FMLA for yourself or family.

My observation is every nurse has their moments at "bedside". Before this, you, yourself detected that some patients may have been unhappy in the past. Now you have external supporting data. As someone who has had feedback like this is the past, listen and act on it. I am culturally more formal in my dealings with patients than American nurses. I am also older and probably a bit more serious and thorough in my interactions. It is possible I might be on the spectrum. Also, I have an issue with my spine which makes my body language look stiff which I think people pick up on. These things have bit me in the bum with patients and colleagues. Not a lot but enough that it has been professionally painful occasionally. There is a reasonable difference in the experience a patient will have between me and a mid-twenties or even mid thirties nurse. I have had to slow down and pay much more attention to non-verbals. Patients don't give verbal feedback on the spot but their nonverbals can scream. If I think a patient is annoyed, they are, and I try to deal with it at the time. I'll also apologize unreservedly if necessary. When you go into a room (or patient's house) spend a moment or two being cordial (“is that a picture of your family"? "Where was it taken”). Try to see and be interested in the person as a person and not a patient. Don't call them "dear", "hun", "bud" etc. because these are reductive, depersonalizing and offensive to some. Know their name before you enter and ask permission to call them by their first name. Review what you are required to do during your visit and ask if that's OK. They may decline some care, want to do it in a different order or want something else completely. Educate gently and document. Patients get extremely annoyed if they think you're going to blast through a checklist or they feel rushed. In home health I know that time management can be challenging. I've even taken to reading a couple of junky, gossip type magazines, knowing how the local American Football team is doing etc so I can have some small talk with patients. I'm not going to tell you to smile more or any of that BS. But know that every patient, even ones with mental health issues, know if we have their best interests at heart. When we are in their homes or in hospital they are vulnerable and need control. So it is a constant negotiation. Some say "do what you like" others feel insulted over a review of their pill boxes. The fact that you're asking about this and not dismissing it shows real courage. We have to constantly change and grow as nurses and the most important assessment we do is our self-assessment. Good luck!

I think if you check you'll find you are eligible for financial aid once asylum is granted. You probably already know this. So you may wish to do a CNA course and work as a CNA until that happens. Low financial outlay plus high employability. Also, look into some of the larger hospitals that have nurse apprentice programs. They are not always well advertised. Typically you apply and start as a CNA (but you're called a nurse apprentice) and most of them pay your tuition. You commit to a certain number of hours a week to work as a CNA. You stay in the program until graduation and then enter their nurse residency program. These are great programs. I think Clay county hospital has one. If you have applied for asylum and are pending a decision you aren't undocumented. What is important is the stage are you at in that process. If you've been granted an EAD you can train and be licensed as an LPN or RN (or certified as a CNA) in any state. If you have not been granted an EAD I would not advise you doing a CNA course as typically you won't be able to obtain state certification or work to maintain that certification. good luck!

Backstabbing. There is nothing worse than when someone gets a resentment with you at work and instead of speaking with you like a grown up, the go to a manager. My former manager used to send people out of her office until you'd spoken to that individual first. Our new manager lets people sit a moan about others. It has created a really bad work environment.

@Davey Do I’m so sorry. What an awful experience for you.

This! It was drummed into me that nursing was a team sport. Yet I see nurses or pcts with heavy assignments and people texting or streaming a movie at the nurses station while others are massively busy. They get upset if they are asked to help (eye rolls and complaining behind peoples backs). If those people have heavy assignments they loose their minds and are the first to complain if they don’t feel they are getting assistance. If the work of the unit is done, by all means relax. But it should be “we” and “our” not “you and your”. It isn’t bullying to have something delegated to you not is it bullying to ask someone to do their job.

My experience is boyfriends, friends etc are not as committed as I am to my dog. I found a good doggie day care and a reliable dog walker. Getting a puppy or very young dog isn’t the best idea and could create a nightmare for you. Training requires consistency. I’m sure you know that a fenced in yard is no real substitute for training and paying attention to your doggo. Also, who will take the dog once you and your room mate part ways? When you go to work, if it’s 3 twelves what’s the plan? You may end up on night shift and then doggy care gets more complex (I’m on night shift). I have had to plan ahead for all of this. I’m not saying don’t get a dog but consider your future. Most of my dogs have lived 12-15 years but I adopted them when they were 3-4 years old. There personalities were formed, they were chill and great dogs. Their training and potty training was easy. All that being said my dogs have kept me sane through nursing school and ten years nursing. Totally worth the time, effort and money.

I was in London, I used to work in corporate finance. I just kept thinking of all the people I knew who worked there that I used to speak with daily or weekly. Then knowing we would go to war. Later there was this surreal silence of no planes flying overhead. London has three airports. Whenever I see footage it makes me want to cry.