I could not have explained this better than Esme12. KimRN, I am so incredibly sorry you had to go through that. You were definitely there for him, fighting for him. Often our training flies out the window when it comes to caring for our loved ones but it sounds like you were able to maintain your composure in order to give your husband the best chance at surviving. That takes incredible courage and strength.
I cannot speak to the actions of the medics on-scene because I was not there of course. I recently lost my father very suddenly and traumatically and was left with many questions for the paramedics, hospital and for my non-medical family that was there. I was able to speak to the supervisor of the ambulance crew and received a copy of their report, also contacted the M.E. for a full tox report and obtained the ER report from his recent visits to the ER. It took a lot of time and energy but I felt it was the only way I could get closure. It was/is very difficult to deal with but personally, I did take comfort in having my questions answered. I wish you could have been part of their resuscitation efforts. I have always been in support of family presence. Again, so very sorry for your loss. No words.