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mayagoose's Latest Activity

  1. mayagoose

    death and dying

    As I sit here at this moment, the death and dying issue now applies to a Director of Nursing who greatly influenced my life. She had a double mastectomy followed by chemo. She was told she was cleared of cancer. Recently, she was told that it had metastasized to her lungs and liver. She never smoked cigarettes. While I know that has nothing to do with metastasis I am so deeply saddened at this moment that I do not know what to do with myself. She started out with this certain facility way back when and took it from a dungeon to what I believe is the finest of nursing homes in the state. She is the backbone - the heartbeat if you will of it all. Sometimes one does not know if they are saying the right thing or doing the right thing. All I know is her time on Earth appears to be limited from the way she spoke to me today and my sadness overcomes me.
  2. mayagoose

    On Death And Dying

    I was working on a telemetry unit and went in to assess the lung sounds of my patient who was on bed rest. I asked him if he could roll onto his side so that I could put my stethoscope to his back to listen. He complied. It was not long before I heard no lung sounds. I asked him to take a deep breath ... soon after another nurse came to me to tell me that at the nursing station the monitor showed a flatline. The patient was a DNR so no Code Blue was in order. It was not long before I was in tears and blaming myself for the patient dying. A well-seasoned nurse asked me if this was the first time I had "lost a patient". She knew. That was about 20 years ago. Since then I have come to a place with myself of understanding that what the other nurse said was true. This changed my life gradually as time went on as would be expected. People are human. The only thing certain in life is death and taxes. One day, years later, I was working at a nursing home. I had several CNAs who worked with me on a regular basis. They were young and as luck would have it none of them had ever experienced the death of a patient. In long-term care, there is much more time to get attached to someone that one takes care of and thus making the situation a bit more complicated. So that day was their first experience. They were crying and falling apart. I really needed them all as, of course, there were many other residents there who needed us as well. I called them for a meeting to regroup. We had to pull ourselves together as a team to deal with the emotions of the family as well as for the needs of the other residents. I explained to them that if they were going to work in the healthcare field, it was more than likely this would not be their last experience with this type of situation. I shared with them ...my story. My story of my first time. I explained how over time it would not be so difficult to deal with and it comes with experience. The next day there was an article in the newspaper that told of a woman who shared my name. She found her husband in her garage pinned under a car he was working on. Her husband did not make it. I did not read the article, nor was I aware of it in any way. There was a lot of whispering going on amongst the CNAs. Finally, one of them pulled me aside and said: "we know that you handle death better than us but at least you could have taken a day off to grieve". They were all whispering about how if a person was in healthcare long enough there was probably nothing that would bother them. It is something I will never forget. It was not even me. I tried to explain it to them, but I have a feeling some of them had their doubts. They were very young and impressionable. It truly was not me. As a matter of fact, there were three people in the area with my exact name. No, I will never forget that one.
  3. mayagoose

    super powers...

    my superpower would be to levitate people. this would alleviate the falls that occur because there are rules that we can not protect them from this because it is their right to fall . perhaps, there are no apparent injuries, perhaps they split their heads open or maybe break a bone or two. "Didn't you hear the personal alarm sound?" by the time that goes off, unless your close enough, chances are good they're on the floor. and so it is wrong to put a table over someone unless they are eating/drinking. Just an example. Gone are the days we could protect people. I need to know who makes these rules up.
  4. mayagoose

    The powers that be

    I am curious to know if the powers that be that make the laws/policies that have taken time from caring for the patient and think it should be more spent on paperwork ie..lengthy incident reports, have ever actually performed the job or if they merely set the rules. Also, in my 20 years of working in various settings, I have seen the staffing to care for those who need us, pretty much cut in half. This can be very frustrating to have people need you and literally we can not be everywhere at once. I realize it has alot to do with money, but this bothers me.