I really feel for you, OP. I am in a similar situation. I am a new grad about 9 months into my first job...in the ICU. I have had 2 performance evals and the first was "you're doing a good job, you're still new and need to improve on this..." but the most recent one broke my spirit. I racked up overtime (more than other new grads on the floor)...not too ridiculous, I think...like 2-3 hrs per pay period (which is like an avg of 30min per shift) mainly to scramble on charting. Some items mentioned I can completely understand needing to work on- time management, better communication with doctors/charge RN, more proactive with asking for orders/knowing what med to request...but it felt so soul-crushing to hear them say things like they were concerned for a patient's safety under my watch. Also, some negative items on my eval were when I ask experienced RNs for advice on an issue and followed their advice!
I was so heartbroken, disappointed in myself, and also annoyed with certain things that I felt were not my fault. (A nurse complained about my colostomy bag leaking...I watched her replace my bag and she put the new bag on the exact same way I did!)
The hospital is very far from my house...and I recently got an interview for a hospital (also ICU) 5 minutes away from home. (I know I have no offer YET...but I'm just thinking it over...) I'm torn. I don't want to be a sore loser/quitter in leaving my current hospital after a bad eval especially since this hospital is much bigger, probably has more high acuity pts/ better learning experience, (better benefits), and newer technology/equipment, and the team is very knowledgeable and nice (some of them). 5 min drive vs 1.5-2hr drive is tempting though.
Any advice? I've even considered that I'm not cut out for ICU or should go lower acuity to get more experience then switch later if I want?