I literally have those same diagnoses' ocd, depression, and anxiety. i totally know where your coming from, i do the exact same thing where if i dont study every day i begin to freak out, i study every day as if the test is the next day even if its not for weeks, and if i dont i begin to feel guilty. im sure you know how the ocd works, its not always just things like checking the door is locked over and over, or repeating things multiple times in a row like most people just assume. the ocd is occurring in your thoughts, obsessive intrusive thoughts like "if i dont study every day i will fail and get kicked out of nursing school" or "im out with my friends, which means im not studying, i cant hang out with my friends or i will fail". everyone has these thoughts , but people like me and you just have trouble switching them off, much like the person who checks the door lock over and over cant switch that off. this is what leads to the anxiety, and those long periods of anxiety can easily make a person depressed. i could be way off but what your describing sounds alot like this, and im not trying to pretend im a doctor here but this is literally identical to my life so i have alot of experience with it. and with all that being said heres what i do to manage it, not just for nursing school but for life in general:
- speaking with a therapist in the times im having flare ups of my condition (its more intense at times of course, and some weeks seem almost like its non existent at all) but yeah a good therapist helps alot, having someone to talk to helps so much, there also trained to teach you techniques to deal with what your going through and believe me they help. and i know you said your insurance is an issue but my therapist i speak with is over skype(sounds weird but its actually very convenient for a busy student) and its only 40$ a session which is dirt cheap for an hour of a professionals time.
- take at least one day a week to indulge 100% into a hobby that pry's your mind completely away from nursing. for me im into cars, yesterady i spent 10 hours straight in my garage and that 1 day a week totally refreshes me and lets me feel less anxious about my work load for the upcoming week.
- caffeine... i dont wanna assume your like me but i drink alot of coffee and when i have a flare up of these obsessive kind of thoughts the caffeine accelerates it. as a nursing student the need for coffee is real but remember it will accelerate these thoughts as well. when i have a hard week where these conditions are flaring up i avoid anything but water.
- my meds help me tremendously, this is obviously something you need to consult 10000% with a psychiatrist. i take lexapro and when i started it helped curve these obsessions alot.
- remember your long term goal. what seems to help more than anything now a days is thinking about how rewarding it will be to help kids just like me. ive spent days in the ER for anxiety and depression before i got professional help, nothing fuels me more than to think about the good i can do for someone who was in my situation. this is the reason that i (someone who worked as a carpenter for 8 years) decided to go to nursing school. it eases my anxiety when i think about why im doing all this in the first place. let these conditions make you stronger not weaker!
i hope this helps you in some way!