Please help (my nursing story to date)

[ursulanursula]

This may be a bit long, but I have no one to talk to and if I don't say how I am feeling, what's going on... I am going to need psychiatric care.

So I graduated in 2003, with my BScN. I had done my fourth year preceptorship on a general surgery floor. I interviewed for a job at the same hospital & during the interview the DON verbally guaranteed me a position on the surgery floor. When it came time for my job offer, she said that she was making me a med-surg float, who would be doing primarily medical. I mentioned how she had guaranteed me surgery floor, and she told me I "needed to step out of my comfort zone" and if I "didn't aceept med-surg float, I could do hospital float but they would staff me primarily on medical floor."

I was fresh out of school. Not very assertive, so I accepted the job. I was on medical floor all the time, had a lenghty orientation (I'll give them that) and proceded to work there for 10 months. The reason I decided to leave was because it was quite physical & I had an injury from 3rd year nursing school (roatator cuff tendonitis) that meds, physio, cortisone shots, etc...couldn't seem to touch. I had gone to the DON to see if any opportunities existed in Peds, or elsewhere in the hospital for me, and she said " I don't know what jobs we have. I am not going to find out for you. If you don't like medical floor, feel free to seek employment elsewhere." Just in case anybody is wondering, I am a competent nurse, who has always recived positive comments from supervisors & cow-workers.

Anyway, I accepted a maternity leave in Community Addictions (took a leave of absense form my medical postion). This job was good (easy on the head & the body), the only drawback was a supervisor that was truly psychotic (no one can stand working for her & eventually quits, except these 2 nurses who have been there forever & have learned to just do their thing). My whole goal at Addictions was to find a job that was "non-physical" or "less physical" to try & really heal my shoulder.

10 months into the position, I apllied for a job at a Psych Hospital in Geriatirc Psychiatry. In my job interview, they told me that the RN's team led, did assessments, family conferneces, rounds with doctors, etc...I specifically asked if the did any physical work & was told "no." I went so far as to say "If you were to offer me a position & there is any physical work involved, please don't offer it to me because I am injured & I can't do it."

I am sure you can imagine where this is going. I get on the unit & surprise, RN's team lead 1/2 the time, the other 1/2 the time, thay have a patient load & do patient care (many bed patients, lots of physical work). I went to my patient care coordinator & she said "oh no dear, there is lots of physical work on this unit, I don't know why they ever would have told you that."

Anyway, I decided to give it a try. It was physical at times, but we had a really good staff & I didn't want to keep shifting jobs & I decided to give it 2 years & then re-evaluate.

I was 1 1/2 years into it, when a job on the Adult unit came up for a year temporary. I figured I would apply & get a break form the physical. I was offered the job in early July. I was not allowed to start it until late Septemeber & was informed of this in a note. The reason was "There are lots of casual nurses working over the summer & we want you to have a good orientation." They decided to give me a lone orientation day in August, and lo & behold, the RN orientating me is a casual. I ask if I can have a 2nd orientation day (to at least have 2 in a row) and they say no. Reason they say no is because I have to orientate a casual RN on the geri-psych unit, not to team leading, but to patient cares.

So I start to think of relocating & going up North (I live in Canada). My fiance & I look into this & I interview for a job in a small community hospital in a remote area. I accept this position verbally & receive the job description yesterday & letter of offer to sign. Based on the job description, I will be in way over my head. Meanwhile, I am on the new unit at work after having had 2 orientation shifts for nights (by a casual of course). I am calling in sick the past few days because my orientation was not good or sufficient & I truly feel unsafe. They won't give me any more orientation because I am leaving, which I understand.

Guys, I just don't know what to do. Do I send back my letter of offer signed & move 6000km away as planned & give my new scary, overwhelming, probably quite physical job a chance? I have been crying all morning because I feel so overwhlemed by everything. Do I not sign the job offer (even though everything is set in motion for the move & we are slotted to leave in less than 3 weeks). I should mention my fiance has secured a job which he is absolutley pumped about. I really need some advice, or a kind word.

Thanks for listening.

[jetscreamer101]

If you don't feel up to the job offered, tell them that. Maybe they have something else you would feel comfortable doing. If not, surely there is something else available in the area you are moving to. Maybe a doc's office or something? School nurse? Clinic? Insurance co.? Check with the local home health to see if there are any light "private duty" needs?

Good luck with everything.

[GingerSue]

if the description is such that you realize that you are in over your head, as you mentioned, then

why are you accepting the job?

[augigi, CNS]

I'd have to agree. If you have a bad feeling before even starting, don't do it!! There are too many opportunities and varied areas available in nursing to do something you a) are physically ill equipped for or b) feel unsafe at. Keep looking.

[GingerSue]

are there some things that you could do in order to prepare yourself for this new job?

[heartbeat2]

Wow...talk about a common thread woven throughout. Sounds like you already know your answer.

You have been through so much already. There are many opportunities out there. Wait until you have a fit for you and your injury if you can.

Hang in there.