We've all been there. In our time as nurses, we've heard patients say some pretty wild things. Whether it's off-the-wall reasons for how they came to need medical care or something as seemingly mundane as a catchphrase which a patient uttered that resulted in you having a laughing fit; those memorable phrases, reasons or moments could win you one of two $250 Amazon.com gift cards courtesy of relode.
Dust off those memories and leave them in the comment form below. The two grand prize winners will be announced during National Nurses Week but have no fear - even if you don't win one of the grand prizes, we are giving away some cool runner-up prize packs to two more lucky winners!
We all know that patients say the darnedest things, let us hear your best! Thanks for all that you, our nation's nurses, do and Happy National Nurses Week!
Be sure to enter our two previous contests for more chances to win...
I had to incert a foley on this lady she was so scared it would hurt. I joked and talked with her while I was incerting it. Then I told her it was all done she said are you going to do the cath! When I told her it was all done she said I'm going to tell everyone your the best foley putter inner! And she did! She was walking with PT about an hour later stopping everyone telling them if you need a foley ask for Julie. She is the best!!
I had a patient admitted for GI bleed due to swallowing paper clips and a spring from a pen. We were having a normal conversation and started talking about our eating habits and he said "you wouldn't know it by looking at me, but I eat really healthy, no GMOs, gluten free,etc." your eating habits are what got you in here buddy.
I had an out of control patient and this patient demanded we called the police so we complied. As they were trying to talk the patient down, the patient said you guys have a very difficult job, there are crazy people out there. Seriously, one of the cops had to walk away because she could not keep a straight face.
One hospice patient of mine thought I was his wife and when I was changing his brief told me he wanted to take me to bed, in not such a thoughtful way. His wife proceeded to yell at him. AWKWARD
This weekend I had an elderly woman who wore hearing aids. I work night shift, so she did not have them in when I assisted her to the bedside commode at 2AM. I placed her call light within reach and assured her that I would be back in 5 minutes if she had not called for me. When I returned to check on her I asked her "Do you need another minute?" She turned and looked at me with horror in her face and said, "NO I DONT NEED AN ENEMA!" Bless her soul, I wish I could show you the look on this poor lady's face at the thought. Once she understood what I said, she calmed down and proceeded to laugh the cutest little laugh. She reminded me of it the next night when I came in and said, "No enemas tonight either, darling!"
After telling pregnant patient her UDS was positive this was my reaponse from her : I do not do coke or marijuana. I am around smoke almost everyday and I was at a party with cocaine on the table. I fell next to the table and must have gotten some in me.
There is absolutely no story behind this comment, but just recently I was triaging a 6 year old in the ER. When I asked her mother about medical history, out of nowhere the 6 year old replied "I'm a psychopath". I was speechless. Turns out this girl wants to be a comedian!! Cutest kid ever
I was taking care of an elderly woman with a bad infection confused and convinced she wasn't at the hospital and that we kidnapped her. When she cleared up she says " I thought I was stuck in a brothel"
careyo
8 Posts
even a toilet can only handle one ******* at a time!