Please help me with my new Customer-er...I mean Pt - page 6

Just got a G1P0 at 37wks, transfer from L&D. Advanced maternal age (she's pushing 50), but no other health or pregnancy issues. She was cervidil'ed yesterday, no progress (shocker at 37wks, huh?),... Read More

  1. by   crissrn27
    Quote from chasingmydream
    well ...i know i posted earlier..but just another note.....
    i did have my last 37. i had had 4 sons and finally got my girl.
    she is an angel. as not easy. i had problems. at 30 weeks i knew something was wrong. to make a long story kinda 33 weeks i had the doctors finally convinced to keep looking, something was really wrong ! and sure enough. my daughter was starving in there. for 3 weeks she had not grown and was literally starving. they gave me all kinds of drugs...for 2 days and then induced. she was born at almost 33 weeks and weighed 3 pounds. she spent 32 days in the NICU. my placenta was blackened and looked dead my husband said. she is a miracle.
    she is wonderful, and almost 3 years old now. but it was a long road..very scarey. to all you nicu nurses, i love the special ones, you know who you made our life in the nicu and we love you for taking care of our daughter and other children in such a critical time !
    She is a miracle, it sounds like. Thank goodness you pushed for an answer!
  2. by   LandDRN
    Quote from KellNY
    No, its all her--she's "TIRED of being pregnant. Can't do this anymore..."
    And yes, that is the quote I used for her cheif complaint.
    Wow, that's alittle against ACOG guidlines!!
  3. by   LandDRN
    Quote from gr8rnpjt
    I think this is an attitude that needs to change with the times. With so many women delaying having children until they are ready, and so many others like us who continue to feel healthy enough to continue to give birth into our 40's, we certainly don't feel elderly..
    My son was born 4 years ago and I was 45 years old, and I felt well prepared for this child. I hunkered down and "did my thing" and only needed my nurse and doctor when my baby was crowning. (by the way, epidurals...wonderful invention). We even delayed the birth until after midnight so I would get my full 2 days in the hospital! My nurse came to me afterwards and couldn't say enough about what a wonderful patient I was and how she really was glad because her other 2 patients were a handful and took a lot of her time. I was happy to be able to experience this wonderful experience and "gift from God" one more time...

    The advanced maternal age guidlines were established to give an age recommendation ( over 35ys old) for both insurance companies and medicaid to be required to pick up certain screenings for this age group if the parents wish (amnios, fetal echos ect..) that normally aren't run on every patient. They aren't meant to "knock" older patients. Of course 40 yr olds can do it, and do it well! But the 37yr old who'd like to be reassured and wants those tests doesn't have to worry about getting fully billed for them!
    Last edit by LandDRN on Jun 2, '08
  4. by   cherokeesummer
    Quote from ruby vee
    yes, some women have their first babies when they are that old. sometimes it's by choice, but sometimes it's because they tried and tried to have babies when they were a more "appropriate" age, and it just never happened. but it's happened now and they're ecstatic and they're going to enjoy it no matter that the baby's father was a one-night stand from their wild business trip to omaha and they haven't seen him since, no matter that their husband left them for his much-younger assistant years ago and no matter that irritating youngsters find it somehow distasteful to see a middle-aged woman having a child.

    how is it irresponsible or selfish? that woman probably had a job with benefits and a living wage, a home, and the financial resources to care for her child. selfish and irresponsible would be having a child at 14 when you have no job, no income and no home but keeping the baby because "it will love me" while you continue partying like the teenager you are and leave the child alone or dump it on your parents.

    her attitude sucked, i'll give you that. but i also find the attitude of someone who called a woman "irresponsible and selfish" merely because she was in her forties and having a child somewhat sucky as well.

    i'm not partial either way but i'm thinking others think it selfish b/c of the hardships that sometimes accompany older parents. my hubby's parents were mid to late 40's when he was born in the 70's. they could not even attend his high school graduation b/c of their illness, there were many things in his life that they could not be a part of b/c of ailing health but i don't think they were trying to be selfish or anything, they were unable to conceive until the time they did, not for lack of trying . and now hubby is 30 years old with both parents gone, his father we cared for up until his death at home last summer, and our son has no paternal grandparents. but age isn't the only way you lose grandparents. my mom was 25 when she had me and she is no longer living - she died of a rare form of cancer 2 years ago so our son has no maternal that can happen regardless of age.

    my point for all the rambling is that some ppl do see very ama parents as being selfish b/c sometimes they can't be involved as much in the child's activities b/c of health issues or death, etc. but having been on the side of fertility problems i would probably have kept trying til i was older if i didn't get blessed with my son at age 29.
  5. by   cherokeesummer
    Quote from babyrn2be
    thank you, thank you ruby for this post.

    i really try to let things roll off my back, but i must say that some of these posts have disturbed me a little bit. i know that you all are venting, and that's just fine. but blanket statements are being made about a whole segment of people who are choosing to give birth later in life.

    this concerns me because i will be giving birth this november to my first child. i will be 40 at the time of delivery. i won't go into all the details why we waited to have a family. one of which is because i wanted a wonderful man to spend my life with, so i got married a little later. we wanted to be financially secure so we waited a year or so to get our finances in order. then we really examined our lives to see if we really wanted a baby. this decision was not made overnight, and i don't believe that we are anywhere near the realm of being "irresponsible" and/or "selfish."

    although not required at the hospital where we will give birth, i'm planning on rooming in with our little baby so that i can relieve a busy staff member from having to bring my baby to me. my husband will be with me so he, too, can learn infant care. although i've been a birth doula for 9 years, i know that there's something that i can learn from the postpartum nurses. my ears are going to be primed and ready to receive any information they can give me about my new baby.

    i really hate to say this, but i'm concerned that the staff might be putting me in a category in which i don't belong. just because i wanted for the right person for marriage, and we waited until we have finances up to date and examined our readiness for a child, i hope that does not put me into a category which doesn't fit our situation, just because i'm 40 and having my first baby.

    sorry, this is longer than what i meant it to be. please understand, i don't want to be stepping on anyone's toes here. i just want to say that there are so many valid reasons why people wait until later, and it doesn't make them any less of a mom just because she doesn't fit the normal age range of a primip.

    i know you've already had your baby as this is an older post but trust me i don't think you will or would have been put in a bad category, i don't judge moms based on age, from young to older, i just care for them and i do what i need to do. to me its not about the age, its about the person and how they care and how they treat their child and those around them.
  6. by   SarasotaRN2b
    Quote from weirdRN
    WOW... Do women really have FIRST babies when they are that OLD?????

    I want to say that is just irresponsible and selfish. No wonder their attitudes seem to really suck.
    Ouch! That's harsh. Not every older mom is in that category, just as not every young mom is. Don't generalize. Yes, this particular one has a high sense of entitlement, but don't lump everyone together.
  7. by   rnmomtobe2010
    You should have told her Burger King was down the road...Just kidding!! Some ppl can be sooo unrealistic.