Funny things that pt's say! - page 5

Pt comes in, ask her what brought her in today, she says that MD checked her in the office and then she had some spotting so she thinks that her "mucous cord broke". Checked a pt, she was 4... Read More

  1. by   Vikingkitten
    Quote from nursechris2008
    haha i absolutely loved the lawn mowing post! thanks for the laugh. next time the doc should write no doing the dishes, laundry, or anything remotely related to house work!!!! ha. thanks for the laugh.
    worked for an ob that did something similar for his patients, plus " no lifting anything heavier than a credit card". needless to say, he was real popular1
  2. by   Vikingkitten
    Quote from obrn9382
    We had a multip come in with her 3 year old son and precipitously deliver. As the pt was screaming her head off, one of the other nurses took the little boy out of the room for some juice and crackers. After the pt. delivered, we brought the boy back in the room to see his new baby sister to which he responded...

    "Mama, where you get that white baby from?"

    The pt was african american.

    Mixed marriage, or OOOPPPs?
  3. by   JenTheRN
    Mixed marriage, or OOOPPPs?
    African American babies often times come out looking "white". They don't get their dark coloring until a little while later.
  4. by   ElvishDNP
    My husband is Hispanic and very brown. Our son was born just as white as I am....he has darkened up as he's gotten older, esp when out in the sun. Five minutes and he's darker than I am in five hours.
  5. by   JDCitizen
    Quote from CAprisonRN
    my patients are definitely not the brightest, but one time an inmate refused to have a skull x-ray stating on the refusal form, "I graduated from high school, so I ain't stupid. I don't need an x-ray to see if I have a brain"
    In 2008 not much has improved here........... If you have not worked with inmates you can never know.

  6. by   newmommy1331
    I had a Hispanic pt's husband once try to explain to me that mom wanted to breatfeed. I dont remember the exact conversation but at one point he said to me, " you know...the titties" I about hit the floor! Hilarious!
  7. by   nursingmommyto3
    All of our pts come in through the ED and the greeter down there always calls us and says "so and so is here for her inducement"
  8. by   L&D-RN
    I walked in to hear a pt on the phone explaining that she was getting antibiotics b/c she had strep like in your throat except hers was in her vagina.. :chuckle
  9. by   bagladyrn
    Quote from L&D-RN
    I walked in to hear a pt on the phone explaining that she was getting antibiotics b/c she had strep like in your throat except hers was in her vagina.. :chuckle
    Actually this is how I explain GBS to some of my patients and their S.O's, particularly to emphasize that it is NOT an STD.
  10. by   LandDRN
    Oooh...this is a fun one! I had someone come in for "traptions", another ask " How come this is taking so long? Every baby on A Baby Sory is born in a couple of minutes." Had some one check in for "fetal distress" b/c she had gotten into a verbal fight and the baby could probably hear curse words at this point in pregnancy.
  11. by   thefrayh2sal
    This past weekend I had a G2 in active labor ask my NST for some Tylenol. My NST said she'd tell her nurse, then asked if she had a HA. The patient replied "no, I need it for these contractions". My NST tells me this at the desk as I was getting her epidural papers ready. I went into the patient, inquired again why she wanted the Tylenol to which she replied for the contractions. I just smiled and told her it wasn't going to work "how about an epidural?". Ofcourse I work nites and this became the running theme for the weekend...

    How about the phone calls in the middle of the night... "I'm 6 months pregnant and my husband and I just had sex. When I got up I think my water broke, something ran down my leg. What should I do?" Upon assurance after some further triaging, "What do you think it was?" :chuckle Hmmm, any takers????
  12. by   bscn_rn_10_years
    I was at triage one day when a young professional man came in with a worried look on his face. When I asked him what he was in for, he stated "well I think I have caught something from one of my co workers" Ok I said (expecting a cold or something) he says in a low hushed voice "well he is bipolar and I think I caught it from him" . Well I had to take a moment and excuse myself as I was crying with laughter.........
  13. by   NurseLite
    OMG. I am getting ready to do my OB/Peds rotation and this is what I have to look forward to ... This is going to be a riot!