? About not breastfeeding

Specialties Ob/Gyn

Published

Hello,

I am not looking for a big debate or anything. I just want to know if nurses, in general, look down on moms who choose not to breastfeed. Not because of a medical reason, just because mom chooses not too.

My friend had a negative experience and feels so guilty for not breast feeding now. In my opinion, I think she is more guilty about not even trying , but she keeps mentioning a comment one of the nurses made.

Just a general question

Thanks!

Well, you're welcome one and all;)

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As a nurse and a new mom, I was so overwhelmed. I KNEW "Breast is best", I went to a breastfeeding class prior to giving birth, I was GOING to breast feed! I cannot tell you what a terrible time I had. I had flat nipples and a baby that turned into a screaming, red tomato when I couldn't get it right!! I ended up pumping for quite awhile, but that even seemed to be looked down on by some nurses

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All you can do is try! You put forth the effort to educate yourself and give breastfeeding a shot. You did more than many moms do by attempting to pump as well. Congradulations to you ! I am sorry it didn't work out, I am sure that was frustrating and discouraging:o . I think that you are you good mom, don't let anyone get you down about not brestfeeding, sometimes it doesn't work out. I wish you and your wee one well. :)

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As a nurse and a new mom, I was so overwhelmed. I KNEW "Breast is best", I went to a breastfeeding class prior to giving birth, I was GOING to breast feed! I cannot tell you what a terrible time I had. I had flat nipples and a baby that turned into a screaming, red tomato when I couldn't get it right!! I ended up pumping for quite awhile, but that even seemed to be looked down on by some nurses

Same scenario here! I even posted on Allnurses for help and one woman in particular was just reaming me at every turn. Nothing I did was right and she was a so-called expert lac consultant. I just learned that there are going to be many choices we make as parents, its no one else's concern and we do it all out of love for our children. Sorry you had a rough time too!

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Specializes in postpartum, nursery, high risk L&D.

I haven't really noticed a negative attitude toward bottlefeeding moms among the nurses I work with. I have noticed a lot of practices that seem to "sabotage" breastfeeding, however! Whisking babies off to the nursery after delivery to have their admission stuff done because it's more convenient for the nurse, giving them "treats" in the nursery at night, circ'ing boys who aren't yet nursing well, etc.

There was a nurse i used to work with who, if a mom was having a tough time for whatever reason...fussy baby, sore nipples, baby not latching well, baby doing a lot of cluster-feeding...would go in and say things like "breastfeeding isn't for everyone," or, "would you like to try giving a bottle?" rather than support and provide information. she was almost proud of it, like she was doing us all a favor that we wouldn't have to spend our time helping that mom with breastfeeding anymore.

The lactation consultants I work with are amazing. They work so hard, are almost always willing to drop what they are doing to come help get a kid to latch, and provide awesome support to breastfeeding moms. They just have so many nurses working against them, so to speak, that sometimes I think they push back a little, and then they are labeled "milk nazi" (or whatever.)

just a bit different perspective.

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When I delivered I gave explicit instructions that my baby was to stay with me at all time and wasn't to recieve anything orally but breast milk. the lab tech wanted to give my baby sugar water while drawing blood. (New research says that or breastfeeding will reduce pain for infants)

I told her no that I would nurse her while the bloodwork was bieng done, but they refused b/c the lab tech wasn't comfortable. Then a battle axe from med-surg floated over and told me that she'd "have to" take my baby for the night b/c I needed my rest. I told her no, that Sara was to stay with me. SHe says " No hon you need some sleep and tried to walk out with my baby!:angryfire Big mistake. No one interferes with me and my baby.

Seperating a mom and baby or giving other oral fluids to a new baby is detrimental to breast feeding. Some nursing practices need to be altered

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Specializes in postpartum, nursery, high risk L&D.

Another thought I had is how our personal experiences/values/choices can affect the care we give our patients. The nurses I mentioned in my last post tend to be either the very young ones with no kids, or the ones who bottlefed their kids and are very vocal/defensive about it ("I bottlefed my three babies and they all turned out fine!")

So, for example, while I happily breastfed my two kids into toddlerhood, we all agree I should not be laying guilt trips on my bottlefeeding moms in hopes of somehow "converting" them to the joys of breastfeeding. Likewise, nurses who themselves chose not to breastfeed should not attempt to downplay its benefits and importance to their breastfeeding moms. we need to put our own values aside while we provide lots of unbiased, accurate information and lots of support for whichever way our patient chooses to feed her baby.

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Specializes in ER.
I haven't really noticed a negative attitude toward bottlefeeding moms among the nurses I work with. I have noticed a lot of practices that seem to "sabotage" breastfeeding, however! Whisking babies off to the nursery after delivery to have their admission stuff done because it's more convenient for the nurse, giving them "treats" in the nursery at night, circ'ing boys who aren't yet nursing well, etc.

There was a nurse i used to work with who, if a mom was having a tough time for whatever reason...fussy baby, sore nipples, baby not latching well, baby doing a lot of cluster-feeding...would go in and say things like "breastfeeding isn't for everyone," or, "would you like to try giving a bottle?" rather than support and provide information. she was almost proud of it, like she was doing us all a favor that we wouldn't have to spend our time helping that mom with breastfeeding anymore.

The lactation consultants I work with are amazing. They work so hard, are almost always willing to drop what they are doing to come help get a kid to latch, and provide awesome support to breastfeeding moms. They just have so many nurses working against them, so to speak, that sometimes I think they push back a little, and then they are labeled "milk nazi" (or whatever.)

just a bit different perspective.

I honestly think that pushing a mother to BF is wrong if her mind is made up, but the scenerio that you talk about is what I most often hear. As I have said before we walk a fine line with lactation support. Help too much (we are nipple nazis) Help too little (we don't support lactation)

Oh what's a girl to do?:chuckle

T

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The hospital I gave birth at had a good way of how they would procede with education on breastfeeding. First off, the class was encourage while pregnant...we were sent info in the mail 2x during pregnancy.

Then when admitted to the hospital, they ask if you are planning on breast or bottle feeding. If you say breast, they ask if you would like the lac consultant to come and see you. You have the choice for yes or no.

If you say bottle feeding, they ask if you would like info on breastfeeding or would you like a lac consultant to assist you,etc. So I had a choice in the hospital. I thought they way they did it upon admission was a good idea.

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Specializes in postpartum, nursery, high risk L&D.
The old timers living into their 90s were not all breastfed. They used to use condensed milk as formula! I'm sure you can agree that the formula that exists today is way more acceptable than the older versions. But, amazingly there are humans alive and WELL today who were not breastfed. My husband was not. They are healthy folk, no allergies, high IQs, no cancers in the family hx...maybe its just anecdotal.

I have several friends who have new babies and NONE of us prop the bottles. This is actually very dangerous. We all "hold and touch" our babies while feeding them. We are very hands-on moms. Realize that just because one breastfeeds does not equal they are being more loving. I hold my baby close to my chest and lovingly look into his eyes while feeding him from a bottle. I sing to him, we hold hands, he puts his little fingers in my mouth. I feel very bonded to him. During my horrible breastfeeding experience...I could not even see his face my breasts are too huge. So I was not bonding with him.

Now, I think the reason society is not breastfeeding at the rate you would like to see...maybe because it takes 2 incomes just to make ends meet anymore. If more people were able to be SAHM then you would probably see more of it. At my job...I don't have time to take more than a 30 min lunch break. So, pumping would have been out of the question. Most women only get 6 weeks off postpartum out here.

Maybe another reason could be since a mother is the sole source of food for the recommended one year...how can she ever break away and have some moments for herself? I am human and need a break once in a while. If there is no option for a bottle, then the mom is the sole person responsible for feedings.

Realize that most cancers have no real cause. I don't know what study you are referring to, but I have learned that it's relatively easy to find any study/statistics to support whatever we want them to. We can thank the internet for that.

I think another reason maybe breastfeeding rates aren't as great as they could be, is the way even healthcare professionals continue to perpetuate a negative and inaccurate perception of what it's like to breastfeed. (Think "being the sole source of food for a year with no break!" "baby attacking mother's breasts!")

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I think another reason maybe breastfeeding rates aren't as great as they could be, is the way even healthcare professionals continue to perpetuate a negative and inaccurate perception of what it's like to breastfeed. (Think "being the sole source of food for a year with no break!" "baby attacking mother's breasts!")

None of the nurses at the hospital said that to me...BTW I don't work L and D, so this has never come out of my mouth in regards to a patient. Is this what you are insinuating?

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Specializes in postpartum, nursery, high risk L&D.
None of the nurses at the hospital said that to me...BTW I don't work L and D, so this has never come out of my mouth in regards to a patient. Is this what you are insinuating?

nope. I just mean that there are a lot of misconceptions out there about breastfeeding that are reinforced when people in general make comments like the ones I mentioned. I think when people hear stuff like this coming from a nurse, it might make it seem even more credible.

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