You know you're an Australian when......

  1. You know you're in an Australian summer when.....
    * The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
    * Hot water now comes out of both taps.
    * You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
    * The temperature drops below 35 degrees and you feel a little chilly.
    * You discover that in February it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.
    * You develop a fear of metal car door handles.
    * You break a sweat the instant you step outside at 06:30am.
    * Your biggest bicycle-accident fear is, "What if I get knocked out and
    end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
    * Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from
    laying hard-boiled eggs.
    * The cows are giving evaporated milk.
    * The trees are whistling for the dogs.
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  3. by   nekhismom
    sounds like texas, too!
  4. by   gwenith
    One of my all time favourite cartoons was a picture of an Aussie in slouch hat and shorts leaning on a post in the middle of what is obviously hell saying to the devil "You think this is hot??? You should have been in The Alice last year!!!"
  5. by   moonladye
    heres an old one
    Whats geographically wrong with australia??

    its above sea level

  6. by   gwenith
    hey watch out or we'll start with the Kiwi jokes
  7. by   moonladye
    I've never heard a kiwi joke, please tell!
  8. by   donmurray
    Most of the ones I heard involve sheep!

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