Charting Bloopers - page 15

Found in the History and Physical section of a patient's chart who had experienced visual hallucinations while ill: YIKES! Angela... Read More

  1. by   Adam D. RN2005
    One of my classmates computered charted that the patient's penis was intact. One problem, the patient was a female!
  2. by   Gompers
    A classmate in nursing school actually charted, "The patient pooped in his pants."
  3. by   talaxandra
    The "pleasantly confused" thing I understand, if you compare it with the many unpleasantly confused patients we get. I had one guy I was doing neuro obs on who, in response to "can you tell me where you are?" said "If you don't get out of my back paddock I'm going to shoot the lot of ya's!" Then there was the unpleasantly confused post-op woman who was scratching and hitting when we tried to prevent her removing her IV - in response to "It's alright, we're nurses" she replied "Nurses? Green b-tches from hell!" With that she kicked the poor RN next to me in the groin so hard he had to go to cas.
    On a lighter note, a friend of mine recieved a patient with ataxia. I'm guessing fatigue is the reason the admitting doc put his admission diagnosis as "walklessness FI"
  4. by   FranEMTnurse
    May the fleas of 1000 camels infest the crotch of the the person who messes up your day...and may thier arms be too short to scratch... I love it!!!!
  5. by   LPN4Life
    My sister charted once, that the patients central line was patent to dependent drainage with clear yellow urine........:imbar

    I learned Purulent the hard way too......:imbar

    I did Careplans and had heel protectors to be in place at all times while in bed, for a lower bil amputee. State surveyors found that one, but got a laugh out of it.

    I also charted that resident had their toenails clipped, and was a lower bil amputee.
  6. by   Adam D. RN2005
    From my first semester of nursing school (Fall 2003), while researching my patient for clinicals, the doctor's handwritting that I was trying to decypher was so terrible that entire sentences looked different from what it really ment. Example, this doctor wrote "the patient is a little stronger", but stronger looked a lot more like the word shrimp. Well, the patient was a bit on the tiny side.

  7. by   schoolgirl82677

    That is a good one.
  8. by   schoolgirl82677
    Quote from Terre
    A new intern to our CCU once charted attempts to cardiovert a patient in the following manner:
    Attempted to convert the patient with 200 jews, unsuccessful. Second attempt to convert the patient with 300 jews unsuccessful. Patient finally converted on the third attempt with 300 jews.
    The mental picture of three hundred rabbis surrounding a patient's bed yelling, "Convert, convert!" was too much. We nicknamed him "Call a Code or Call a Rabbi" from that day forward.
    Good one
  9. by   SharkLPN
    Quote from Gompers
    A classmate in nursing school actually charted, "The patient pooped in his pants."
    That's OK, you're in school. Now, the resident (second year!) who charted on the H&P that the newly admitted lol with diarrhea/dehydration had "c/o pooping herself the last few days", ummm... Are ya too rushed to write fecal incontinence, don't know how to spell it, or is your med school diploma written in crayon?!?

    And I'll second the understanding of 'pleasantly confused'. I'd much rather have a confused one who is happy in their mindset giggling at everything I ask or tell them, than the ones who yell, swing at you, argue when you attempt to reorient, etc.
  10. by   KIWIRN
    I found one on the orthopaedic ward.
    "Patient felt dizzy after standing on bed during bedmaking" I could just picture the nurse feeling dizzy looking up at him
    Last edit by KIWIRN on May 20, '04 : Reason: spelling error
  11. by   BHolliRNMS
    Order for a grouchy old lady in the nursing home who constantly complains about the food, the noise, the sunshine, etc: " Prepare food to pt's satisfaction"
    Hey, doc, you coming to cook?
  12. by   RNtoJD
    Not in charting, but a verbal blooper. A few years ago while caring for a hypertensive patient on a Med surg floor, I made 2 IV attempts and got in, but blew both veins when I attempted to advance the catheter. I must have been very busy, because I shouted down the hall ( without thinking ) to another nurse, "Can you try getting a site in the guy in bed 10? I blew him twice!"..."er, I mean his veins."
  13. by   RNtoJD
    ...and another more recent one. I once without thinking asked a double amputee how tall he was. Then as an effort to redeem myself proceeded to follow up with. "and how much do you weigh?" --Needless to say, I couldn't wait to get out of there.