Anyone got any good nurse/doc/hospital/enema jokes?

  1. Okay, let's all tell a good medical related joke. The one who gets the most kudos wins. I'll start first. It's a little off-color but don't worry, I'll asterisk the bad words out.

    Question: What's 18 inches long, black and hangs in front of an *$$*#**?

    Answer: A stethoscope on a surgeon!

    Yeah, I know, pretty bad. Okay, let's hear yours.<input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden">
    Last edit by tnbutterfly on Jul 27, '10 : Reason: Language
  2. Visit fungez profile page

    About fungez

    Joined: Jan '10; Posts: 370; Likes: 1,219
    from US
    Specialty: 19 year(s) of experience


  3. by   iNurseUK
    What is the difference between God and a plastic surgeon?

    God dosen't think he's a plastic surgeon.
  4. by   iNurseUK
    Bad netiquette to post twice I know but another popular one on my old surgical ward was:

    Q: What is the definition of a holistic orthopaedic surgeon?

    A: They consider the whole bone.
  5. by   emsboss
    How do you make a surgeon taller...

    Give him Viagra...
  6. by   mykrosphere
    Quote from emsboss
    How do you make a surgeon taller...

    Give him Viagra...
  7. by   teeniebert
    ..."some ***hole's got my pencil!"
  8. by   GHGoonette
    This story was told to me by a surgeon.

    An RN phoned him at 3am one morning to tell him his patient could not defecate. His response was, "Sister, take two enemas; give one to the patient and the other one to yourself, then you can both go s++t!