Nursing Advisor a Downer

[pendulum9]

Hello everyone! I just passed the HOBET and looking at starting the actual nursing program this summer.

I have a little problem though. It seems every time I go in to see my nursing adviser, she tries to discourage me from going into the nursing program. Even though she knows I'm dead set on doing this, she always starts/ends her sentences with "if you still want to do nursing..." The last time I was in there, she rambled on about how hard the pass or fail tests can be.

Today, she went on and on about how expensive it will be, how heavy the books are, how much information you have to learn in a short amount of time, how having kids and doing this is very hard (my 22 mo old daughter came with me today) and finally went on to say that "life" can simply get in the way of doing this EVEN if you're intelligent enough! UGHHHH! I just want to throw something at her when she does this! I do like it straight but this is just plain depressing. Shouldn't your adviser be just a little more encouraging than that??? I had straight A's last year and have an A in Anatomy, B in Chemistry and Algebra this semester so.....what gives???

A little history, I never recvd a phone call back from my first adviser who had a "family emergency" come up so I changed advisers. During the process of doing so, I had to speak to the head of nursing for the college. The advisor must have been a good friend to her because she became very rude when I told her she never returned any of my calls. I complained about her to the dean. He apologized and sent me to this lady. So, I don't want to change advisers. I just want to find a polite, yet direct way to tell her how she makes me feel when I go to see her.

Thanks in advance for any advice you can share (:

[caliotter3]

Just try to avoid her if possible. Do everything you need to do on your own. Find out info from a good instructor. Stay away from negativity. This woman seems to have a problem that is affecting her job. Would bet that she has a deep seated jealousy of nursing students. She probably, at one time, wanted to go into nursing herself. Just sweep her attitude aside and go on about your business. And congratulations on your good grades. Keep up the good work.

[Prettyladie]

my adviors are twu were verrrry discouraging. i only have a 3.4 and science gpa of 3.5 he was like why bother to apply basically. he was like only students with 3.8 get in. blah blah well my friend got in with a 3.6 so basically what im saying is advisors are rude lol no really just take it with a grain of salt, if you passed the hobet and you're ready to start in the summer do it. you're motivation is perfect.

[morte, LPN, LVN]

perhaps she is trying to make room for some one else?

[Carrie_MTC]

The Dean of Nursing at my school acted very similar to that the first couple of times I met with her and she can still be a ***** to this day. I think they just want to make sure your REALLY dedicated and are looking for any sense of doubt in you. Even if they make you feel discouraged don't let them see it, just keep a smile on your face!

[AOx1]

I have seen many, many students with 4.0 GPA at the start of nursing school that struggle and fail the first few tests. I tell incoming students that nursing exams are different and offer assistance in learning to study for them, but most people don't come in to visit until that first failed test. I do warn students that the exams are different, not to scare them, but to encourage them not to give up if they get a bad grade on an exam. It sounds as if your advisor is trying to remind you of the challenges ahead, albeit in a rather negative manner.

It is also possible that your advisor has seen many students change their minds; this happens a LOT more than you would think. Also, your advisor may be trying to be realistic vs. discouraging and may not realize it. For example, I would be honest but not discourage a student who did not stand a great chance of getting in. In general, they may be aware that people with less than a given GPA aren't likely to be admitted. This isn't meant to crush dreams, but merely give the student a realistic view of their chances. It wouldn't be fair or honest to do otherwise.

Just a hint for your first advisor- in the future, it might be helpful if you are having a problem with someone, to discuss it with them in person and establish expectations upfront (for example, should you contact them by phone or email? When should you expect a response?). I have had some students get angry when they email me at 11pm and I "still haven't responded" by 8am the next morning. I once had a student complain that I didn't return her phone call fast enough also...the campus was closed for the Christmas holiday! Faculty members have emergencies, just like all people. I don't think the first thing on my mind at such a time would be checking my school voice mail. We also have lives outside of school, and sometimes it interferes. Students do need to realize that most of us also have clinical teaching schedules and often are only in our offices 2-3 days a week. It might be less stressful to assume the best about people until proven otherwise. I understand how stressful application is, but at the same time, most people aren't doing things with the intent of making it worse. PS- many advisors at are actually faculty members, i.e. nurses, and not therefore someone who is jealous of students and wishing we could be nurses. We may have a MSN or PhD behind our names, but this doesn't mean we aren't nurses; I still actively practice as do my colleagues. Although I realize some colleges hire advisors who aren't RNs, many won't allow anyone but a faculty member to advise.

My advice would be to pursue your dreams in any case. No matter where you end up, there will always be someone who tries to discourage you. I doubt this faculty member is doing so intentionally, but if that is the case, why worry about it? Nursing is a difficult profession to start with; you have to know in your heart that you want it, even if EVERYONE tells you "you can't". When you are admitted, find a mentor who will encourage you.

[RNDreams]

Did she suggest other careers you should go for? I am only asking becasue when I first started my associates degree 4 years ago :) and mentioned nursing they immediately started to pucsh me towards teaching and telling me how hard on your body nursing is etc. and I must add thast was when my body was 50 lbs less pre-baby so there was no reason to tell a young, healthy pretty much ripped as far as my muchles went girl that it is very physical not to mention I was still waitressing for the Four Seasons hotel Co. at the time and my job consisted of rinning around my entire shift, working doubles, triples, whatever and I know he made that suggestion before ever looking at my transcripts so I know he didnt made the suggestion according to my grades. I think that at the time there was such a shortage of teachers here in Ga. as opposed to nurses that they are either instructed to, or have the natural inclination ( b/c they are teachers) to suggest that profession.

Since I ended up becomming an esthetician (skin care) and leaving the 4 seasons b/c they didnt haqve a spa at the time and got into management and was doing very well financially, I decided to get my Associates in Business b/c that fit more into spa Management but now that just 4 years later I am totally burnt out of spa management I know that I want to go back to my original plan and become an R.N.

I also have a baby, or little girl as she says, who is 2 and 1/2 and I know that sacraficing 2 years for her and my family up to losinf our house so I can pursue this dream is the sacrifice i will have to make and my husband is supportive and that is the route I am now taking.

So back to you, dont let anyone dissuade you and try to stop you frm going for your dream. Like I said it was pretty clear to me what that adviser was trying to do becasuse he suggested another career within 5 minutes of knowing me and I know he hadnt seen my previous rescords so I know it was strictly becasue Ga needed more teacher so he was prompted to encourage new students go that route.

Did they suggest or push you towards doing something diffrent right off the bat.

sorry gottra go baby is pulling on my arm so i can spell check, and there are probably tons of errors from her doing so.

Let me know!

Christine

[sh1901]

I honestly think that they do that to be sure that you really want it. I think that from an administrative stand point, it looks bad for the school when a class starts with say 75 people and then graduates only 20. It sounds like your adviser is being honest, and although it is discouraging to hear, if you want it, it doesn't matter.

My adviser told me that I could never manage to make it working full time and going to school. Granted I am in my first semester, but I have an A in lecture, an A in lab and gleaming evaluations from clinical while many of my counterparts who do not work are not doing so well. They hand in assignments late, miss class, miss clinical...yeah, and I wasn't going to be able to do it.....hmph.....

Just stick to your guns, do everything that she tells you to do and prove her wrong!!!

[RNDreams]

:down:I agree it really just depends on who you are and your backround. My frind who is in semester 1 says the same thing, he had to of couse leave his full time day job working for the ENT I previously work with becasue it was a 7:30-4 so that was his whole day but he got a job at BJ's wholesale club who says they are student friendly and (luckily he is a guy and has the strength to do this physically) but he just has to work 3 deus a week unloading trucks and stocking freezers and he was able to get the job and go to orientation for that job over his Spring break and he told me the same thing that people dropped out the first half od the first semester (about 6 out of 60) becasue they just freaked out and quit. He didnt even buy the book for the first semester becasue he was a medic in the army and had work as an MA for this ENT for 6 years so he said that he knew it would get harder but he would still be selective about what books he bought and onlt buy the ones he really needed and thus far he has an A and he has a child and came back to the Drs office to train a new person every day of his spring break and said he hadnt picked up a book ince, so like the other poster said its just all about who you are and your experience.

I know I do my best when I have more to do. I havent been working for the last 2 weeks and I am just finishing my business degree before I start my nursin prereqs and it has been really hard for me to do anything besides sit on this computer and read on this webiste and do anything to avoid my schoolwork when I was working in spa management more than full time I was alyeas in top of my work and got better grades then I do now.

Go figure?

Christine