I finally took the sick role.

  1. For the first time, I admitted at work that I have depression.

    I got depressed and I still went to work (I wasn't thinking well. I didn't knew what to say.). Some minor problem arised when I blindly followed something said to me. I realized I have to leave for my client's sake. I could have done so many worse things.

    I admitted to my head nurse that I'm depressed. I think she thinks that I'm just extremely sad (a patient of mine died the other day) and allowed me to leave for the day. It was my off duty for the following two days and I am expected to return after that. However, I am not ready. I wanted to file for a sick leave but I am scared. My reason for sick leave is depression. At some point, I prefer to resign rather than file for a sick leave with depression.

    Resigning means I don't have to return to a place who knows I have depression. I'm scared of the stigma. I'm really scared.
  2. Visit hazyblue profile page

    About hazyblue

    Joined: Dec '09; Posts: 128; Likes: 65

    7 Comments

  3. by   VivaLasViejas
    Please don't throw the proverbial baby out with the bath water. Quitting a job outright because you need sick leave and are afraid someone will judge you is like killing a spider with a flamethrower. Don't do it!

    I'm not saying this to minimize your suffering, because I know from personal experience with depression that there are times when one just doesn't have anything left to give. I also know what it can do to a career to come "out of the closet" with a mental illness, although depression is relatively common among healthcare personnel and doesn't carry the stigma that some other conditions do. (I have bipolar 1 and I can tell you firsthand how well that went over at the job I was in when I was first diagnosed. That's why I don't discuss it in the workplace anymore.) Believe me, you won't be the first nor the last to need help dealing with the stressors inherent in our work.

    You don't say whether you have an "official" diagnosis of depression, but if you do, your doctor can help you get medical leave by writing a letter taking you out of work. If not, please consider using your employer's EAP program or seeing a mental health professional who can diagnose and treat you. You don't have to disclose ANY illness at work, it's really no one's business unless you make it so. In the meantime, try not to worry so much about what people might think, and take that leave of absence. (((HUGS))) to you.
  4. by   hazyblue
    I am now diagnosed with moderate depression. I had my doctor write me a letter to file for a leave but I didn't end up using it. It turns out...that I don't have leave privileges. Fortunately or unfortunately, I didn't have to worry about leaves/resignation because I am fired. I can understand why they fired me and I saw it coming but the way I was fired... annoys whatever it is left to be annoyed of me.

    I had to go back to work after calling in sick for one day. Very awkward. :***: They said I might be marked AWOL. They made me do a performance evaluation earlier than my colleagues. It includes self-evaluation and it was hard for my depressed brain to process. After that, they made me report on my day off for the actual firing stage which involved the uncomfortable topic of why's. It was so uncomfortable, I don't know what I was saying anymore. Eventually, the fact that I was depressed surfaced. Then, they read my performance evaluation which scored negatively . I know my performance was downhill last week but I think I deserved a higher score that what they have written. Finally, I was fired... and I found out that I still "have" to work until the end of the month.

    Apparently, they cannot just fire people instantly.
    Last edit by hazyblue on May 28, '14 : Reason: too much information :D
  5. by   VivaLasViejas
    What the.....??! I've never heard of firing someone and then keeping them on till the end of the month. Either you're fired, or you're not---there's no middle ground. I'd tell 'em to go chase a cat if they think they can toss you aside like yesterday's newspaper and then demand that you stay till the end of the month. That's crazy!!
  6. by   RainMom
    Agree that you should NOT be working once they fire you. How does that even work? Are they going to ask you to train your replacement too?
  7. by   meanmaryjean
    I have never heard of such a thing (re:your firing).

    (hugs) We all struggle with depression sometimes I think...
  8. by   hazyblue
    I said no to them. Err..thankfully, I am depressed so I didn't go "*** are you kidding me? " on them. Apparently, what they did is against labor laws (immediate firing). They wanted me to stay for a while to protect themselves from the law. Come to think of it, my probationary period isn't over yet but I was failed already.

    In the end, they said that they aren't closing their doors on me. I'll process that thought later.
  9. by   VivaLasViejas
    Don't do it. You owe those idiots NOTHING. If they run afoul of the labor laws, too darned bad.

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