Nurses struggling with mental illness

Nurses Disabilities

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I was just wondering if there are any other nurses who struggle with mental illness. It seems to be one disability that is met with little tolerance and support in the medical field. I do have major co-morbid mental illness, Major depression/PTSD/DID, and have had many problems in my career. I have been in therapy and on meds for a long time and have worked very hard to be functional, and I have suprised myself by what I have been able to achieve. Currently, I am a hospice nurse in a residential setting and it seems that I have found my niche. It doesn't aggravate my illness too much. I am very busy at times and most of my job revolves in much cognitive thinking and decision making about the best ways to respond to a patient's emerging or existing symptoms, and in assessing patients to see where they are in the dying process, plus lots of educating to patients and families. My extensive personal trauma background has made me able to have a different perspective on death and don't see it as the scary thing that is SO SAD, that a lot of people do. Plus, because of the things that I have been through, I am more able to be compassionate and understanding of patients and their fears. I especially do well with patients with existing mental illness or lots of anxiety. I notice that a lot of nurses have little tolerance for a patients anxiety and are not willing to take the extra time to walk them through things and provide the extra reassurance that they need.

Yes, there are some nursing jobs that I don't think I would be able to do because of the fast on the spot life and death action necessary. ER and Trauma/Burn are pretty much out for me. But thats OK. A lot of nurses couldn't handle doing what I do either for their own reasons. We are all suited to certain things.

Having mental illness doesn't automatically make you unsuited for the nursing profession. Even though I have heard many times, "what are you doing here?" "Shouldn't you be doing something else, less stressful?"

I am here and am doing the thing I am suited for. Yes sometimes I have to take time off due to my illness, but its no different than somone who has flare ups of a chronic physical illness like lupus, chronic fatigue, or fibromyalgia.

I would like to know how other nurses have coped with their own illness and their nursing careers.

Severina

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
I have also been told, in the past (from a therapist) that I am co-dependent.

Aren't co-dependents supposed to be good caregivers ?

Yeah, I have that codependency too although I've worked hard to handle it in a healthier way.

In an UNhealthy codependent it's called careTAKING - more like we "take" hostages, or let others "take" from us. When it's healthy, it's careGIVING, we give our love, time and energy voluntarily!

That's really simplifying it, LOL ... but it works for me! A more detailed view (don't take this SUPER seriously, there are lots and lots of wonderful qualities in a caretaker - but it can harm the caretakER and the caretakEE if we are not careful!): :stone Just watch out and don't take on these characteristics if they aren't yours!

Profile Of A Professional Caretaker

by Thomas Wright

1. Caretakers have usually grown up with a strong parental injunction "Don't be selfish." Consequently, they go through life masking the self-concern. They turn all their attention to the concern of others and largely ignore their own emotional needs. They live in constant fear of being seen as selfish.

2. Caretakers are usually lonely and emotionally undernourished. They operate in an emotional trade deficit. They give enormous amounts of compassion to others and never get enough nurturing in return. They have many friends but few intimate, nourishing relationships.

3. Caretakers are alway subject to depression as a result of their stroke deprivation. This stroke deprivation results largely from the caretakers, unwillingness to receive compliments or care from anyone else. They are afraid to accept care from others for fear it would jeopardize their role in life.

4. Caretakers are predictable, steady, useful and safe. They are sensitive to the needs of others. They are also boring ! They are not particularly enjoyable because they only smile and rarely laugh. (A spontaneous, raucous belly laugh is of great thereapeutic value)

5. Caretakers have such difficulty remembering names, even the moment after an introduction. They are so preoccupied with their own self-consciousness (How am I doing?) that they don't pay attention to other's.

6. Caretakers wear a sweatshirt with a message on both front and back. On the front we see, "How am I doing?" On the back we read, "Try harder!" All emotional transactions of the caretaker are designed to gain approval.

7. Caretakers are usually very harried. they over-commit their time and over-promise themselves. They are usually running late because they cannot break away for fear of encountering disapproval.

8. Caretakers are afraid of their own anger as well as the anger of others. They avoid conflict at all costs and direct all their anger toward themselves where it is safely converted into depression.

9. Caretakers are only able to excerise assertiveness when they are attacking social injustice or acting as advocates for their clients. They rarely asert themselves in direct self-interest.

10. Caretakers are almost paralyzed when it comes to asking for what they need emotionally. they would rather withdraw or pout, than ask to be nurtured.

Hi! I'm trulie.julie and in the summer I will start taking my prerequisites for nursing school, hoping to attend next year. I'm glad I found this place and I have a very serious question. I have struggled with depression and anxiety my whole life and have been medicated for the last 20 years. The meds I'm on are Wellbutrin, Effexor, Klonopin .5 and Ambien. When I go to take my drug test are these going to show up and disqualify me from even trying to become a nurse and if I tell the testing nurse what I am on, will that also disqualify me? If necessary I would get off the klonopin and Ambien but they have literally been life savers for me and I'm at the most "normal" I've ever been in my whole life. No one in my life even would have a clue I'm on psych drugs. Sorry this post is so long..I was just wondering if anyone here has any advice. Thank you so much in advance

Julie, it is absolutely necessary that you tell the testing nurse what you are on. And bring proof of the prescriptions. You will be more likely to be disqualified if you try to hide what you are on. If they suspect that you are taking medications not prescribed... trouble! I do not have a psych situation, but I do have fibromyalgia. The treatments for fibromyalgia entail the use of antidepressants (to help restore levels of Serotonin), antianxiety meds (to aid in sleep), anticonvulsants (to help with nerve pain), and sometimes narcotic or nonnarcotic pain medications. Even tho the situation is different, many of the treatments are the same. And, due to the constant pain I was in before I was diagnosed and treatment began, I was depressed, moody, and generally just plain miserable. Like you, the meds have been life savers.

Good luck in school! Don't be afraid of holding back on your dreams! :icon_hug:

throughout my teen years i was very depressed but unlike most people with depression instead of being mopey and sad, i became angry and violent. when i finally was ready to face up to the fact that i had a problem i was put on prozac and i thought that was that. but what i didn't know was that i wasn't just depressed i was bipolar, it turns out many, many people are misdiagnosed because most only go get help for the depressive side and don't explain the whole picture to their doctor. also being only on a drug like prozac can make you cycle more rapidly. :angryfire

in aug of this year i was finally properly diagnosed by a psyciatrist and was put on lithium and prozac. they help alot and i am almost normal, the only thing is i still have anxiety problems and a very hard time sleeping. i stay up for days sometimes and then i sleep for days as well. i am hopfully going to acheive my dream of becoming a midwife, before i'm 30. i have basically flunked out of school twice due to the fact that i start my classes and do well but then i get depressed and loose momentum. do any of you have any ideas on how i can make the third time a charm?

i have just moved home to stay with my mom so that i can get my life together and hopefully learn to control my mi if not overcome it completly. also as i am still young and hope to have kids someday in the near future. do any of you know of a bipolar medication that is safe for during pregnancy. my step mother stayed on her meds while she was pregnant with my half brother and now he is having alot of developmental problems that could be atributed to the lithium and all her other meds. :uhoh21:

one more question and then i'll give it a rest. have anyof you heard of meetup.com it is a site where people who share the same interests and.or problems can get together and chat and even meet in person. i was wondering if any of you would be interested in starting an group for people in the medical profession with mental illnesses? anywho let me know and i can set it up as i belong to a few other groups in my home town. :p

celtic bombshell

i don't know of any meds for bipolar that are safe to take during pregnancy. however, i do have a cousin who is bipolar and got off her meds during her two pregnancies. it took a while, but for some reason during pregnancy, she seemed to stabilize even off her meds. my aunt talked to her mhmr case worker and she said that many bipolar women stabilize during pregnancy, tho starting out may be difficult. and she needed to restart on her meds immediately after she gave birth (tho it unfortunately took a while to get them going thru the state -mhmr).

Hello Everyone,

I have been viewing the different threads at allnurses.com for the last 2 years. I've learned alot about the nursing field and some of the in/outs and gripes that accompany and field, not just nursing. Right now I'm in my last semester of pre-nursing classes, before clinicals. I have hoped and prayed for the last 2 years for someone (above) to give me a "sign" that I should pursue nursing for my career. The thought of being a nurse almost give me "chills", in a really good way. My mother, 2 grandmothers, and aunt are all RN's and I look up to them so much. My husband thinks I have a "calling" to be a nurse, as he would put it...and my family thinks its the best career fit for me. I am currently an administrative assistant (A.A. Business Admin) for a large company and am miserable.

Which brings me to the reason for my post. I also have severe anxiety, generalized anxiety disorder, and suffer from panic attacks, which are treated with Ativan PRN (yeah, my first nursing term!!!!)...I have taken SSRI's etc.. before...none seem to help enough to override the side effects (weight gain, lack of desire for intimacy) to keep me on them....but I wonder if I will be able to "keep" it together in the nursing field. I also have a hard time sleeping...I take 3 mg ativan to go to sleep....I worry about having to work 3rd shift and being really out of sync with reality. I would LOVE the 3-11 shift or any combo of 2nd shift..i just don't think i could do the overnight thing..i mean physically..without being so "out-of-it" i would probably end up in the hospital or worse....

So basically, I'd great to read this post and it's what has prompted me to finally register and post a reply myself. I know from reading your posts that some people take ssri's...which one's work and do you notice the side effects?..And do you think "condition" would interfere with my career as a nurse. Do you really have to be tough as nails?....Any information from anyone interested in helping me on the quest would be appreciated in the utmost. I think becoming a nurse will do wonders for my being..I want to find my niche' , too!!

i've taken SSRIs for a couple of decades. i've worked PM shift & flourished on midnoc!!! may be worth a try?? a sun or full-spectrum light is great! i have had a hard time d/t the weight gain issues...but stick /c it considering the alternative???? best of life to you!

I called the (I think) ADA when I started my last job (Maine). They said that I did have to disclose to employee health what meds I am on and dx. But that the hospital isn't allowed to discriminate based on mental illness.

But how could you prove that they did not, if they don't disclose the reason you (anyone) were let go.

Another thing - you can apply for unemployment insurance, don't they have to disclose why you were fired in that instance?

That is sooooo stupid. They cannot discriminate based on MI blah blah blah. Who do they think they are kidding? All they have to do is come up with some other "legitamate" reason for letting you go and deny that it has anything to do with MI. Its as simple as that.

I for one would cover my a**.

Companies discriminate any way they want to in spite of the "law". You can't prove a thing.

Severina

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
That is sooooo stupid. They cannot discriminate based on MI blah blah blah. Who do they think they are kidding? All they have to do is come up with some other "legitamate" reason for letting you go and deny that it has anything to do with MI. Its as simple as that.

I for one would cover my a**.

Companies discriminate any way they want to in spite of the "law". You can't prove a thing.

Severina

So someone having an employee health exam, what should they do? What should they put on the form? that they are not on meds?

I agree, they have ways around the law...

i was wondering if anybody knew of any nursing research done about nursing and mental illness. i can relate. how do you guyz cope with the long hours, day-night rotations, and the high stress of the job? do you have any advice? how does one not burnout under such working conditions and trying to cope with MI? a nurse's work is so crazy these days...how can a nurse not go crazy?

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
i was wondering if anybody knew of any nursing research done about nursing and mental illness. i can relate. how do you guyz cope with the long hours, day-night rotations, and the high stress of the job? do you have any advice? how does one not burnout under such working conditions and trying to cope with MI? a nurse's work is so crazy these days...how can a nurse not go crazy?

When you figure it out, let me know :(

I do know that even WITHOUT mental illness a nurse is hard pressed to not burn out -

:rolleyes:

Specializes in Med Surg, ICU, Infection, Home Health, and LTC.

Having read this thread through I must say "Kudos!" to every one of us with the courage and bravity to step up and talk about our individual battles with mental illness in all it's many forms.

Anyone who admits that they have a mental illness automatically has to struggle with being a victim of discrimination. I am very careful when, and to whom, I share things with.

Society, as a whole, chooses to look negatively on the diagnosis of mental illness. Yet if the truth be known, many of us deemed "mentally ill" are working, functioning, and contributing to society in a beneficial way. :)

(( I cannot count the nurses that I personally know that are on antidepressants and anti-anxiety and insomnia medications because of the stress of the job :rotfl: ))

I have been a nurse for twenty years and have worked full time for both decades. I also live with DID/PTSD, dyslexia, and depression. It has not been easy by a long shot. (((can you say amen?? :uhoh3: )))

My mother was treated with ECT for severe depression. She was often either physically or emotionaly absent. She was also abusive due to her own stuggles with mental illness. Back then there were few treatments for the mentally ill ..... and in the 40's and 50's mental illness carried a severe stigma. There was little to offer those that needed help.

My father was a control freak, horribly abusive, and a weekend alcoholic. (((I do wonder at times if there is not a genetic component to some forms of depression and illness. Sort of a chemical and enviromental predisposion to one illness or another.))))

I admire everyone here who has been so couragious and faught against such odds to not only battle their own "demons", but to continue in a field called nursing that needs compassion and empathy and also contains it's own unique set of stressors.

So often I have felt alone in this war trying to survive and "appear" normal.....

KUDO'S

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
Society, as a whole, chooses to look negatively on the diagnosis of mental illness. Yet if the truth be known, many of us deemed "mentally ill" are working, functioning, and contributing to society in a beneficial way.

Welcome to the club!!!

ALL of us as nurses ought to take good care of ourselves mentally, physically, spiritually, etc. Just like we tell our patients, LOL!

Welcome to the "club" - I think it should be "mentally interesting" vs. "mentally ill", LOL!

Severina,

I know what you mean. I have ADHD which I was shocked to find out as I think of myself as very calm and laid back, at least for the most part. I also have some minimal depression . I most likely have PTSD also but have not even tried to get therapy as I am just finishing up with my RN, about 10 more weeks to go.

I do not think the medical field has much compassion or tolerance for staff with any disorders. I have had to speak up for myself and I know I am looked upon as not being that smart. In truth I am very intelligent but just put up with the stigma of the diagnosis. In time everyone will see.

I was employed as a Nutritionist for 15 years. and had an excellent reputation and a lot of good skils, the patients and the docs were all pleased.

My problmes are accelerated now because I have to sit so much which is a killer for me. I do much better on the go, nursing shoud be good for me.

I understand where you are coming from.

I have been through it all. The death of my 2 young kids, the death of my 2 and only sisters, the terrible physical abuse of a spouse, and emothional abuse of one parent and one other husband. So I will admit I have a unusual outlook on things also after springing back from all of that.

I get condescending statements from my instructors all the time about things that don't matter. Like: why do I always have to "write"; why do I carry my books with me to clinic; why was I late giving a dying man his bath when his granddaughter drove in from another city to see him, possibly for the last time...he got all the important treatment...meds, etc.;why do I write so much information about my patients (if you don't you do not get to do it again...you fail and you are kicked out!); and comments about being "different".

It never interfered with me doing an awesome job in my field before and probably won't again. I am glad I am different if that is what they want to call it. I call it experienced, empathetic, and practical. A bath is second to a last and emotional visit from a grandaughter...It is written in my final evaluation and I almost did not make the last semester because of that bath. I cannot believe it! You cannot think or make decisions on your own I guess if you are a student?! I know where you are coming from about the death issue. We don't have a set amount of years we are to live. You never know. Death is peace, illness often is not. It is not an accepted view in the USA but more in Europe. I found my niche before and I hope I will again before someone kills me with thier negative outlook.

Hang in there. Sometimes you have to just know...and keep it to yourself. You cannot change certain things and other reactions is one of those items you cannot control, but you can control your own thoughts and actions. I bet you are an awesome Hospice nurse. I would rather have someone like you during my final hours.

Again, Hang in there, don't expect too much from the other professionals. If you learn "ouside the box" and think the same way, things can be a little difficult but you will be an asset to yourself and then to others.icon12.gif

I know from reading your posts that some people take ssri's...which one's work and do you notice the side effects?..And do you think "condition" would interfere with my career as a nurse. Do you really have to be tough as nails?....Any information from anyone interested in helping me on the quest would be appreciated in the utmost. I think becoming a nurse will do wonders for my being..I want to find my niche' , too!!

I have worked in mental health about 15 years, and know many other nurses who do as well. I hired a nurse who had spent her previous five years in a state psychiatric hospital as a patient - recovery is possible and even probable! As for anxiety disorders in general, medication is very rarely able to do it. Look for a therapist skilled in cognitive behavioral therapy of anxiety and you can learn skills that will enable you to manage the anxiety. The Anxiety and Depression Workbook is also a good resource. As for the SSRIs - they improve every year. All work and most have different side effect profiles. Lexapro, one of the newer ones, has fewer sexual side effects (I take it for major depression). You can also manage by taking Bupriprion along with an SSRI to help with sexual side effects, or utilizing trazadone at night to help with sleep (it is an antidepressant with the side effect of sleepiness). Look for a psychiatric NP to work with you to find what works. Good luck - I know you can do it! And no, being tough as nails is for hammers, not nurses, in my opinion!

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