Finally Made It!!!! Now what???

Nurses Recovery

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I received a call from my monitoring specialist today from HPRP he said, "Andy, I am calling to tell you, you are offically a free man!" I cannot tell you how awesome I felt, I sat in my pt's room and started crying...I feel proud to have completed this long 4yr journey... anyway, not a few hours later and I realize somehting....I HAVE NOT ACCOUNTABILITY! I can go anywhere, anytime, drink anything and take anything............To be honest I'm a little scared......there have been times when that vial of dilaudid would have never been missed...my addicted brain convinced me I could only use it once................then I remembered I had not called in! Those days are gone now.......bitter sweet, scary, elation......scary.....happy.....scary.......think I'll hit a meeting after work!

Thanks for listening.

Specializes in ICU.
Yeah, more like 1,000 lbs....I just got the official discharge letter.....not gonna lie, I actually started crying when I read it.....It's wierd.....I was at a wedding this weekend......everyone partying, living the life I used to.....its then I realized I don't want that life anymore....I am grateful for the program, good luck, keep me posted on how your job search is going. Any leads? What are your interests?

This is a good place isn't it?

Have you ever thought about giving back? Volunteering for your state's peer assistance program? It really is a good way to keep your sobriety in check AND give back to nurses that really need you.

Ya, I am applying for a job in the same hospital on the sister unit I worked on. My old nurse manager manages that unit and says there is a position if I want it. I will probably start next week if everything goes good.

The happy tears are the best tears! I agree with the wedding thing, people look sloppy.

That is food for thought ETN. I use to volunteer in my town years ago. It was somewhat overwhelming so I got out of it. I told myself when I retire I will get the my dream volunteer job. Then I was asked yesterday to help volunteer for the towns zoning board. Just maybe I will.

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