Nurses and our Healthcare Needs?

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Hello Everyone,

I am starting this thread in hopes to see everyone's honest experiences and to seek help in understanding the Nurse as a Patient/Doctor Relationship. I have experienced a difficult time in my 20 year nursing career with finding a Doctor that shows competent treatment practices for my own healthcare needs. I find physicians that choose treatment options for my care that I disagree with often. As healthcare professional, I know it is best to establish one physician of general practice to work with and manage your entire healthcare needs, but I find it hard to locate one that does not practice as if he is "God" and knows all. I find they do not treat patient's as individuals or a patient's condition as individual to that patient. I seek the knowledge a physician has, but I am afraid, I cannot find many that give me comfort in caring for me. It may be me that only experiences this, but certainly hope not. Recently I was involved in a MVA that was no fault of mine, and have begin to have pain in my neck and upper back. I asked the physicain about getting spinal x-rays, and he questioned me about our patient/doctor relationship. Saying he was not sure if he was treating me or I was telling him how to treat me. The pain and issues I have experienced with the accident has been terrible, but that upset me to no end. I simply told him "I have no problem seeking a second opinion if necessary", and become emotional. He ordered "Valium" for me... "stated it was for a muscle relaxer" geezzz... That is only one example... I could share many.

I wanted to hear from other nurses and their experiences ?

Hope to see a hugh response....

Sincerely, Rose

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I think it's because of the way they are educated and the fact that sometimes they just don't know what to do.

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Well, the MD I see currently (for the past 5 years) is wonderful and knowing I'm a nurse is open to my suggestions and preferences. But I have encountered MD's like the one you speak of in the past. Sometimes it seems like a control thing - I'm the DOCTOR, you're the PATIENT, I tell you what to do! I don't know about your situation, but if you are not comfortable with your PMD, then by all means look until you find one you are comfortable with. Have you tried seeing a Nurse Practitioner or a DO instead of an MD? In my experience, NP's and DO's tend to be a bit more holistic in their approach to patient care.

Good luck!

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I also have seen doctors with this mentality. Sometimes I have been tempted (but have resisted that temptation!) to ask them "Who died and made you God???" I am like the previous poster: my doc and I have a wonderful relationship, and I had the same relationship with the doctor I had before this one. I am treated as an equal and my suggestions are considered. If my doc doesn't think that what I'm suggesting is necessary, we discuss it.

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I asked the physicain about getting spinal x-rays, and he questioned me about our patient/doctor relationship. Saying he was not sure if he was treating me or I was telling him how to treat me.

I'm assuming he knows your a nurse. There have been times when I wonder if being a nurse hinders the doctor-patient relationship, when the nurse is the patient. The questions we would ask as a patient tend not to be the typical questions they would get from a lay person. We also may already have a very good idea about what is wrong, also not typical from a lay person. In a lot of instances we know what tests/Follow-ups may be necessary, again, unlike most lay people. We will also word our questions/inquiries in a manner atypical of a lay person. I think sometimes when we ask questions or express our opinions as a patient, it is can be misconstrued as telling the doctor how to treat us as a patient. The response to your question about spinal x-rays was an over-reaction on the physicians part in terms of the situation.

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Thank you all for the posts.... I did see a NP by the way.... took x-rays straight to the NP of a neurologist...as should have been referred by the PCP... I certainly do not know what to do with the PCP now... but go on still another search for a physician that I can establish a better repore with. Since I live in a rural area, it may take a move to a larger city to locate one. I would hope more nurses will share their experiences. Nurses have a right to speak up for our healthcare treatments, but I believe even the lay person does also.

Sincerely, Rose

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Specializes in ER.

I think my doc and I have a good relationship. She assesses the problem and then says we can do A, B, and /or C and tells me why for each option. I pick what I would like, and if I can think of something else she will add it, or explain why it was not needed. It takes her more time and energy (and knowledge I think) but I also think we learn from each other, if only because I ask more questions than most.

If a doc told me it was his way or no way I'd find someone else. You are missing out on learning about your own health if you don't discuss other options. My doc will discuss anything, but I admit I usually end up doing exactly what she recommended in the first place.

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I think my doc and I have a good relationship. She assesses the problem and then says we can do A, B, and /or C and tells me why for each option. I pick what I would like, and if I can think of something else she will add it, or explain why it was not needed. It takes her more time and energy (and knowledge I think) but I also think we learn from each other, if only because I ask more questions than most.

yeh! :yeah:

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Specializes in PICU, Nurse Educator, Clinical Research.

I've had two major medical issues in the last two years, and i've dealt with many, many doctors- about 75% of them treated me like I can't possibly know what I'm talking about, since i'm not an MD, and one was condescending specifically because i was in nursing school at the time- he actually had the audacity to say, 'well, when i was in medical school, there were some people who became convinced they had whatever we were studying at the time...that's probably your problem.' Turned out I had endometriosis with adhesions throughout my abdomen. Thanks for nothing, doc. :madface:

I've started bringing detailed notes for appointments on ongoing issues....labs, images, surgical reports, that sort of thing- I had that over, then wait to see what the doctor says. Generally, they decide i must not be talking out of my posterior region, since i went through some effort to bring the pertient documents, and ask me what *i* think is going on.

that being said, when i run into a 'doctor god' type, I don't go back.

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I have a PCP who will usually defer to my judgement if a treatment is in question because he says that I know what I'm feeling better than he does. He also knows I'm an RN. I really feel that we have a partnership. I feel that way with my pulmonologist except sometimes he thinks I know more than I do and I have to tell him to slow down or explain something better.

My mom had a doc who never explained anything to her and never consulted her and he never spoke a language she could understand. She just blindly trusted him. But that was her generation and I think we've learned from those experiences.

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I love my Old Dr. but he retired. He had been my doctor since I was born, so i guess he was getting kinda old. The one that took over his practice I hate, he talts down to me it feels like he is doing it because I am young. My brother also felt like he was being talk down to by the same new Dr. but it would seem that he was really nice to my mother. so we decided it was an age thing. But I am going to keep him till I can find a new one that I like. In my home town we have a doctor shortage as well as nurses so you never give up a doctor unless you have a new one.

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Thanks for the excellent replies... everyone!!

One thing I wish to point out...is the fact that having one physician follow your health history is extremely important to me. This MVA has brought this to my attention for sure.... I have had to collect X-rays from two different hospitals, records from three different physicians, and get them to the neurologist that will decide the changes in my spine. Prior to the accident I have no back/neck problems... so this has been an nightmare of events that followed. Plus... I was at work when the MVA occured... never have I dealt with workers comp....what a nightmare and they are not even primary in coverage..... I think that is a discussion for a new post.... LOL

Again... keep your reponses coming... I do feel this is a "problem" all nurses will eventually face.

Rose

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