Why are nurses such back-stabbers?

Nurses Relations

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Why do nurses feel the need to "tattle" on colleagues to the boss for petty things? Behavior like this does nothing to elevate our profession and everything to keep us down. Why are there some nurses who feel superior when they tell on someone to the manager? This recently happened to me and I thought I had a good rapport with my co-workers yet one of them ratted me out to the boss on an off-the-cuff remark that I made. Why does this happen? Is it because the majority of nurses are women and women are catty individuals. I'm a woman btw. From now on though, I am just going to do my work, and only talk to the other nurses/aides about clinically relevant stuff only. Other than that, I'll keep my nose in a book. Actually, I won't be working at this current place much longer. There are staffing issues that put my license in jeoprady so I am starting a job hunt after the holidays.

So, why do we do this to eachother?

BINGO. That's what I've been thinking as I read these posts. People feel threatened for one reason or another.

I work as a flight attendant currently, dominated with a female workforce. The funny thing is...I RARELY see this type of behavior among the women I work with. There is always a mix of male and female...about 4 to 1 on overseas trips. On domestic, I usually am the only male. But I don't see the problem in my profession. We work as a team and get the job done. What threatens one of us, threatens all of us.

The larger problem with us is my company...United...it is really a sucky dysfunctional organization.

I flew United one time and was dissatisfied with them. The flight attendants seemed burned out and stressed.

Specializes in disability.

HI fuzzie You have hit the nail squarely on the head. You have assessed the situation planed your response so well and clearly to this topic imparted home truths and evaluated the reponses of soooooooooo many imature people in this profession. What a psychologist you would make to us who scream out at this behaviour (sorry Aussie spelling) Love to all who want to shake the system for the benefit of our pts. :kiss

Specializes in disability.

Ps I am hopefully dating a fly boy thats about all my high altitude experience. But he does give me a lift each time I talk to him Hmmmmmmmmmmm Byeeeeeeeeee

let me tell u 1 thing all girls jealous to each other ang nursing proffesion is possesd by girls

Back-stabbing isn't gender-based in my experience. You find it where there are limited opportunities for advancement and many competitors. This has often occurred in some traditionally female jobs which lacked much in the way of opportunities. On the other hand, you will find it in any environ where there is rampant competition and few opportunities.

Best way around it - keep your nose clean and be positive.

I agree with you 100%. I do think when people behave like that...the deficiency is within themselves. If they bring attention to you and what you are doing...it takes attention away from themselves.

Recently I almost quit a job, found that just a change of shift....all it took. The night nurses are "normal" ...I was beginning to think I was ultra sensitive, etc. But now it is so nice. I do wonder why the boss, who knows what goes on doesn't intervene?

I wouldn't come in on that shift to help out for anything. It was so bad I was getting physically ill and actually needed to get medical attention twice. That was the final straw.

...... now I am happy going and coming back home. What a difference a day makes. I gave myself 2 nights...if it wasn't better I was out of there...there isn't anythng that could make me work under such duress.

I told the boss, I am sure she believes me but almost the bad behavior is accepted. I counted 2.5 hrs worth of breaks....in one 8 hr shift, swearing, being on the internet, inappropriate behavior with the patients, horrid back stabbing....and a rumor of even more than inappropriate behavior ...after work with the patients.

I could not believe it!! The cloud above my head....was screaming "this is crazy...totally".

I am so relaxed and happy now ...only pass in the change of shift with the others...only 1/2 hour...that is tolerable.

There are other staff memebers that are aware of what is going on....long term employees...but it goes on?!

I don't care now, even if I have to pick up some of the slack they leave behind....gladly do it just not to work with them anymore.

I hope to never leave this job.

Specializes in ER/Geriatrics.

I think there is quite a bit of unprofessionalism at work....I think people blurr the lines at work way too much....there wouldn't be so much trouble if people would go to work and do their job and keep their personal life separate.

Liz

HI fuzzie You have hit the nail squarely on the head. You have assessed the situation planed your response so well and clearly to this topic imparted home truths and evaluated the reponses of soooooooooo many imature people in this profession. What a psychologist you would make to us who scream out at this behaviour (sorry Aussie spelling) Love to all who want to shake the system for the benefit of our pts. :kiss

Barb...I love Sydney, but it is an exhausting trip (17 to 19 hours of duty out of San Francisco + a commute from Denver).

I love Australia and Australians. Most of the people I've met there are friendly and positive. It's a beautiful country...and so much like the US in many ways.

I hope to never leave this job.

That's an encouraging attitude. You found your way to make it work!!

I was beginning to doubt my decision to go to nursing school!!

I have noticed with my job there are a few nurses who like to 'tell on others"(I work in an office setting, no direct patient care) These gals are a throwback to girls in junior high school. I have no time for this pettiness and just do my job. We have a new system for recording and I hear a few that have to make sure they are doing it right and are wondering if others are doing it wrong. Whats with that? We all have manager that clearly can see what we are doing and point out if it is not correct.

Realize that these days, more people in general are impolite. Lots of people do not have manners. Lots of people never say please or thank you. Often in public, when I hold a door open for a stranger, that stranger doesn't say thank you. Lots of people just care about themselves. They see life as a rat race.

As for nursing, I don't think of my myself as just a nurse. I look at my job title as Nurse / tolerator of assholes. We don't just get paid for nursing. We also get paid for putting up with difficult personalities. It's part of the job and it's one reason I do not like nursing.

In defense of gender. Women are not the only backstbbers. I worked in a male dominated field for years before becomming a nurse. It was just as horrible what men did to each other.

It is a symptom of feeling powerless. Powerless people gain a type of power by bullying others.

Sometimes we are all in situations where we have no power or precieve we have not power. Some of us are always in these situations. So it is human to grab power where you can. Often this means bullying.

You might wonder about this when people who are in a position of real power do this. Here is my take on that. One of two things is going on, he has been getting his power this way for so long he does not even know another way and does not know it is no longer necessary. OR he still (at least in his subconscious) is powerless. He has limited power (don't we all) but there is STILL someone who has power over him. So he still feels weak and powerless. He feels this is the only way to hang on to the power he has.

THis is not something the bully consciously thinks about but merely "feels" on some subconscious level. So much for my 2 cent therory.

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