Angry Nurse

Nurses Relations

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I am wondering if this has happened to any of you.... I got "talked to" by my Assistant Nurse Manager (charge nurse) because of an incident with a patient. My patient asked for some water, and I went to get it, but on the way to the kitchen, got stopped by another family member stating my one of my other patients had CP. After 30 minutes, I took my patient her water, only to find out her son called community relations saying that his mother was ignored. I apologized, saying that we were short staffed that day, that I had an emergency to attend to. He said there was no excuse for his mother not getting water. Anyway, I got "talked to" because I was not supposed to tell patients and family members that we are short staffed. What am I supposed to tell them, that I a retard? Why do they think that nurses should take all the blame? What do you think?

goldilocksrn,

In my eyes, you deserve a gold star.

You handled the situation exactly the way it should have been handled.

You were truthful and up front with your explanation. You also gave a reason in case another incident occurred that prevented you from being Johnny/Jane on the spot.

You did not try to make up a bogus reason or accept the blame for something that was beyond your ability to control. in fact you did exactly what many in nursing are wanting to see more of happen. You provided education to the public as to what is going on. What better opportunity could have been afforded than this.

Some have said it is not the patient's problem that we work short staffed. If it does not boil down to being their problem, then exactly whose problem is it? It is not their fault, but then again it is not the nurse's fault either.

Too many nurses have been brain washed to follow the company line in trying not to tarnish its image in one way or the other.

As for this guy who called and complained, i know him all too well. I have seen and dealt with him too many times. He likes to stand outside of doors with an upset look on his face when he does not get his requests met immediately. He truly does not care about anyone other than himself under any circumstances. He feels very self-important and tries to show everyone else that he is. He does not like to wait in line or wait his turn. he will cut in line anytime he gets a chance and will not feel bad it. In fact this guy has many disguises. He comes in all shapes, and colors, and can be male or female of any age. No mater what you do or how far out of the way you go, he will never say, "thank you". You can not satisfy him.

Many nurses will give this person excuses and rationalize his behavior and by doing so, actually reinforce it. His mother might have been in the hospital and he might have been concerned or had issues in dealing with it, but many times assholes are just assholes. Under the customer service banner you can not deal with people like this. Any attempt to set limits is just met with more complaints that you have to face.

Let me add that if hospital and other places do not want to have to face the reality of short staffing, including the complaints that it generates. Then they have it in their power to change things by providing workings conditions, pay, and the subsequent hiring of additional personnel including support and ancillary personnel to make them go away. Too many times, the buck is passed from the top directly on the nursing staff and eventually to the individual nurse who is powerless to do anything. I can see that from some of the responses you have received that some nurses like to perpetuate this as well.

You have every reason and right to be angry about what happened. You received zero back up or support for doing the very best job you could and also in the long run had the blame put squarely on your shoulders where it did not belong in the first place.

I never will understand why we cannot let family members know when we are short staffed. I have been told to use the phrase

"Staffing challenged" I really hate being PC when common sense would work better. I guess Admin thinks all patients and their familys are stupid. And, as a potential customer, I take great offfense to it!!

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!?!??!??! Doesn't your institution teach you first day what to say!!!!!!! Both institution's (hospital's) I've worked the first day taught us what to say regarding staffing shortage. And DON'T mention short staffing!!!!!!!!!!

I like that idea....keeping the staffing shortage hush hush....it only makes me look like a running idiot everyday!!!!

I never mention the nursing shortage. But I will explain about ALL of my patients in a fast synopsis. Most patients get the drift. I'm not going to hide the truth under a rock. That's what the hospitals want, that's not what they're going to get from me!!!

You know I feel my job has many levels. And at times the level is "waitress" I want my patient to feel comfortable. I'll ask all my patients at night if they need a snack.

I was a patient 2 times in the past 2 1/2 years. And the people I remembered most were the nurses that helped me bath after my surgery and the one that got me a snack. Those were simple offers but made me feel so much more comfortable. I really appreciate those gestures....I know the staffing on that unit and those two nurses I'll never forget.

Originally posted by ocankhe

We have all worked in understaffed conditions and have taken the dissatisfied comments from both managers and patients. (I don't think any RN would refer to a patient as a customer, but I have heard administrators and board members refer to them that way). The real question is how to get adequate staffing? Intellectually I agree that the public is slowly realizing that there is a Nursing shortage but until they are directly affected by it the usual American response is to ignore it. If the the RN doesn't tell the patients who will? By telling them at the point of service (a nice managed care term) it then becomes real for them. It willl not become real to the administaors of health care facilities untill they can no longer replace the RN's that are leaving their facility. And then they will try to replace the RN's with unlicsensed assistive personel.

I believe this nurse would had been thrilled to have an unlicensed staff member attend to this family's request for water pitcher to be filled. We need all the help we can get and I'm thrilled when we have nursing assistants on since it has been rare lately. Unlicensed staff can be utilized to help with a short staff situation in my opinion.

Originally posted by teamrn

In all due respect, dwajr, for years nurses have 'taken it on the chin' and done it your way and let management 'handle the complaints'. Patient care has NOT improved because of a 'talking to' that you may get from your manager. I feel that patients have EVERY right to be aware that staffing isses ARE real, and if that means that the nurse whom they may have a relationship with tells them-quite frankly I don't care WHO tells them-they do have a RIGHT to know.

Why do we in healthcare feel the need to 'hide' behind a shroud of secrecy to pretend that everything in healthcare is allright-when we know in our heart of hearts that its not? Consumers may take time to 'catch on' to what we see every day, but once they know, I believe they will be a formidable force for change, and healthcare professionals from top to bottom will have egg on their faces from a deception that 'everything is all right'. I cease to see patient advocacy here. The damage done from this deception will take YEARS to remedy, and I see that as an unnecessary erosion of trust.

I think the big part of this problem is the son who felt there was absolutely no excuse for their request not to be met immediately. Has the "me" generation become too unreasonable.

Any person who calls community relations when water isn't delivered immediately is well versed in putting in complaints.

One reason not to tell this son that they were short staffed is this guy doesn't care.

I'm sorry to say, but my feelings are this society hasn't cared about the nursing situation crisis. Recently, during an impending nursing strike that was to take place with issues about short staffing and wages, editorials were written in with complaints from patients stating elective surgery were being cancelled.

Several articles were written that health insurance will go up with increase wages nurses obtain during contract negotiations.

Originally posted by babs_rn

I don't think the general concensus means to imply that a waitress is lower and can be humiliated. I think what everyone is pointing out is the attitude of patients and others that a nurse is nothing more than a handmaid or a "glorified waitress". We have education and are charged with making life/death decisions on the spur of the moment. That should afford us some modicum of respect on a professional level, which is, admittedly, above the level of the responsibilites a waitress has. We are there to care for our patients, not cater to every whim, as a waitress is expected to do. Our jobs are more complicated and require extensive understanding and critical thinking skills. As I'm sure others in this forum have done, I waitressed my way through college. Don't misunderstand us when we use that analogy.

First, I do think this son was unreasonable with not understanding the delay in this incident. Second, respect to others should be given on any level when a person receives a service. I'm not sure what you mean by cater to every whim. Taking aside the complaint from an unreasonable family member, keeping a patient hydrated and the "whys" has been part of our education. I do not think staff providing water to their patients has been thought of us as being a glorifed waitress.

While it is not a life/death decision, it is a task we are required to do. However, I'm always appreciative when a family member sees that I'm busy will go to the ice/water machine to fill their family member's water pitcher.

With the complexity of patients in the hospital today, I feel just the opposite and nurses have gained more respect for what they do today. I have not felt that patients reflected feelings that we are glorfied waitresses. The biggest frustration today has been time. Being well organized has become essential in nursing.

I'm new to this form & I probably have a very different perspective than most. I entered nursing because of having to watch a relative suffer in nursing care. One thing that was consistant was the lack of available water. Now, when I am on duty, I make sure whoever is passing meds includes getting each person a fresh pitcher full of ice & water that will at least last an hour or two. Yes, they complain. Yes, it is a hassle. But our residents deserve to have water available at all times. If I were that womans son I would have complained only if the lack of water is a consistent problem.

Flo

Originally posted by FlorenceN

I'm new to this form & I probably have a very different perspective than most. I entered nursing because of having to watch a relative suffer in nursing care. One thing that was consistant was the lack of available water. Now, when I am on duty, I make sure whoever is passing meds includes getting each person a fresh pitcher full of ice & water that will at least last an hour or two. Yes, they complain. Yes, it is a hassle. But our residents deserve to have water available at all times. If I were that womans son I would have complained only if the lack of water is a consistent problem.

A patient who has chest pain needs immediate assessment. This nurse had to look at this patient first, then go and get the water pitcher filled for her other patient. I'm assuming you are working in long term care which I've also done for several years. You had someone you could delegate this task to, but in a hospital situation many or most times you are it.

I also believe each patient/resident should have fresh water, however, my assessments of my assigned patients comes first and then I pass water.

Does the residents have water pitchers or is a glass of water left at the bedside. This was a complaint on night shift where I previous worked. There were no filled water pitchers left out at night (they were picked up and cleaned on evenings).

Correct me if I'm wrong, but this man c/o his mamma not getting a pitcher of water promptly? The nerve...Isn't that something you complain about in a diner or a restuarant? I would have said," In all due respect Mr. Whateverhisnamewas, we had an unforseen emergency arise which called for my immediate attention and delayed myself from bringing you this pitcher of water. Should this happen again, and I can't say that it won't, the ice and water machine is located over there (pointing to where it is) and you may help yourself. If you have any questions, you may speak to my unit manager." He would have gotten the point without me saying a word about the short staffing stuff. Some people just have too many ballz of which one should be in their mouths! Priorities first, water second. Don't worry about him, he'll get over it.

I encourage family members to get involved with the care of their loved one. It takes a load off of you and makes them feel as though they are doing something for the person. ;)

I didn't mean to imply that water should take precedence over critical needs & assessments. I just know (from my own experience) that when little things are overlooked over a period of time they become big things. This guy may have actually been complaining about coming in to find an empty water pitcher every day for two weeks - it just got vented at the wrong time. We have pitchers available for the residents at all times & if this wait were a rare incident for this person I think it may have been overlooked. (of course I know there are people who aren't happy unless they are complaining - I try to imagine how frustrating it would be to have to watch my mom / dad in a similar situation)

I do work in long term care & find my work extrememly rewarding but there are times when I am at the peak of my own frustration. When I deal with a crew who isn't as dedicated to the patients as I feel they should be I want to scream! In my facility there are several nurses / nurses aides who will gladly let a patient wait for their water or sit in a soiled bed while they catch up on the latest office gossip Although this doesn't seem to be the situation we're discussing it may be the situation this guy dealt with the night before.

Originally posted by FlorenceN

I didn't mean to imply that water should take precedence over critical needs & assessments. I just know (from my own experience) that when little things are overlooked over a period of time they become big things. This guy may have actually been complaining about coming in to find an empty water pitcher every day for two weeks - it just got vented at the wrong time. We have pitchers available for the residents at all times & if this wait were a rare incident for this person I think it may have been overlooked. (of course I know there are people who aren't happy unless they are complaining - I try to imagine how frustrating it would be to have to watch my mom / dad in a similar situation)

Generally, hospital admissions are measured in days, not weeks.

I tend to think this son was unreasonable with the fact he called community relations instead of hearing an explanation on the whys the request was not done immediately.

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